The Random, Meaningless Announcements Thread 3!

[Shadow Wolf]

Jury duty is tiresome. A bombardment of paying attention to a bunch of people all day wore me out.
I'm still excellent at short hand notes that no one but me can transcribe, however.

 

[Revoltingest]

Or frantic. A word that I have come to use more often since using internet forums.

The first 2 minutes of this could get you at least 50k posts.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

The Right Way to Poop in the Backcountry

The Gear for Your Rear

• A sealable bag or WAG bag
• Hand sanitizer
• A trowel
• Toilet paper
  

You're supposed to use leaves. And just dig a little hole and bury it.

 

[John53]

Her. I accidentally pressed some buttons on the air conditioner.
Me. How do you accidentally press buttons on the AC?
Her. Do you know there's an economy setting?
Me. Yes. How did you accidentally press buttons?
Her. Is it on economy?
Me. No. How did you accidentally press buttons?
Her. Why not?
Me. Because the bloke who installed said it was useless. How did you accidentally press buttons?
Her. I don't know.
Me. Which buttons did you press?
Her. I don't know it was an accident.

 

[Stevicus]

Russian traffic officer with golden toilet is arrested after police uncover massive bribery scheme

Police colonel Alexei Safonov and six other people were arrested by Russia's Investigative Committee in the southern region of Stavropol.

Officials released footage of the Safonov's mansion, its lavish rooms, extravagant decorations, a billiards hall, and even a golden toilet.

He is believed to have led a criminal gang which issued permits to grain cargo transporters in exchange for bribes.

The permits allowed the transporters to ignore regional laws, even when crossing police checkpoints.

The Investigative Committee of Russia, which is roughly equivalent to the FBI in the US, said the group received bribes worth 19 million roubles (£187,568).

Among the gang members arrested were a former senior traffic officer, a traffic inspector, and four civilians.

A golden toilet.


I never thought my life could be
Anything but catastrophe
But suddenly I begin to see
A bit of good luck for me

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden twinkle
In my eye

I never had a chance to shine
Never a happy song to sing
But suddenly half the world is mine
What an amazing thing

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden sun up in the sky

I never thought I'd see the day
When I would face the world and say
Good morning
Look at the sun

I never thought that I would be
Slap in the lap of luxury
'Cause I'd have said
It couldn't be done
But it can be done

I never dreamed that I would climb
Over the moon in ecstasy
But nevertheless It's there that I'm
Shortly about to be

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden chance
To make my way
And with the golden toilet
It's a golden day

Good morning
Look at the sun

'Cause I'd have said
It couldn't be done"
But it can be done

I never dreamed that I would climb
Over the moon in ecstasy
But nevertheless It's there that I'm
Shortly about to be

'Cause I've got a golden toilet
I've got a golden toilet
I got a golden chance
To make my way
And with the golden toilet
It's a golden day

 

[Shadow Wolf]

Russian traffic officer with golden toilet is arrested after police uncover massive bribery scheme



A golden toilet.


I never thought my life could be
Anything but catastrophe
But suddenly I begin to see
A bit of good luck for me

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden twinkle
In my eye

I never had a chance to shine
Never a happy song to sing
But suddenly half the world is mine
What an amazing thing

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden sun up in the sky

I never thought I'd see the day
When I would face the world and say
Good morning
Look at the sun

I never thought that I would be
Slap in the lap of luxury
'Cause I'd have said
It couldn't be done
But it can be done

I never dreamed that I would climb
Over the moon in ecstasy
But nevertheless It's there that I'm
Shortly about to be

'Cause I got a golden toilet
I've got a golden chance
To make my way
And with the golden toilet
It's a golden day

Good morning
Look at the sun

'Cause I'd have said
It couldn't be done"
But it can be done

I never dreamed that I would climb
Over the moon in ecstasy
But nevertheless It's there that I'm
Shortly about to be

'Cause I've got a golden toilet
I've got a golden toilet
I got a golden chance
To make my way
And with the golden toilet
It's a golden day

Any jokes of freezing your *** off are no longer funny having to follow that.

 

[sun rise]

frenetic.

frantic

fanatic - just what RF needs most of all

 

[Shadow Wolf]

fanatic - just what RF needs most of all

You should go do dog things and pee on them.

 

[sun rise]

I'm in a good mood. The doctor today said everything looks good - see you next year. The dentist said that everything that's going on in my mouth is probably the result of the tooth being pulled and not something else.

So I'll be off to bed shortly.

 

[Wu Wei]

Do you really want that cross to bear?

If I did 180,000 posts in 24 hours, I doubt there is much I could bear.

HEY!!!!! Leave me out of this....

 

[Wu Wei]

The first 2 minutes of this could get you at least 50k posts.

NO, needs this

 

[sun rise]

It's very odd for me and it won't last but

 

[Revoltingest]

 

[Brickjectivity]

Today I finally put on my new climbing harness. It's my first time, so I'm practicing knots.

 

[Stevicus]

 

[ChristineM]

Interesting jeans day today. This morning i put on an old pair of holy ;-) jeans. It seems i managed to get my right leg through one one the holes and didn't notice half a denim leg flapping behind me until i went to the shop and was subtly informed of my dress code faux pas by no less than four different people.

So i corrected my error, continued through the day, ate dinner, sat for a relax and cup of tea when i felt a fluttering around my lady bits. I stood, unfastened and unzipped my jeans, slid them down and a wasp flew out. How long it had been there i just do not know but I would call that very lucky that it didn't sting me so rather than giving it a spray with my homemade wasp killer* i relented, opened the window and coaxed it out.

Spoiler: * Homemade wasp killer

It's that time of year when wasps are out and non to docile.
So...
Homemade wasp killer that works better than just about anything you can buy. In a plastic spray bottle pour 10% washing up liquid, fill with water and mix gently (otherwise lots of foam). A quick spray of troublesome wasps instantly kills them. Itvworks by foaming up in the spiracles and the wasp cannot breath.

 

[Stevicus]

Police find accused leg thief with leg strapped to head

TULSA, Okla. (KOKH) — Kevion Hooks was arrested for an armed robbery in which he took a prosthetic leg from the victim, police say.

According to the Tulsa Police Department, the victim stated that Hooks came up to him with a large metal spike, took the victim's backpack and also took the victim's prosthetic leg. Hooks even asked the victim the worth of each item he was stealing.

When Hooks was apprehended, they found him with the victim's leg strapped to his head.

Police say they took the leg off Hooks' head and gave it back to the victim.

People always make fun of Texas, but people from Texas make fun of Oklahoma.

 

[Stevicus]

Interesting jeans day today. This morning i put on an old pair of holy ;-) jeans. It seems i managed to get my right leg through one one the holes and didn't notice half a denim leg flapping behind me until i went to the shop and was subtly informed of my dress code faux pas by no less than four different people.

So i corrected my error, continued through the day, ate dinner, sat for a relax and cup of tea when i felt a fluttering around my lady bits. I stood, unfastened and unzipped my jeans, slid them down and a wasp flew out. How long it had been there i just do not know but I would call that very lucky that it didn't sting me so rather than giving it a spray with my homemade wasp killer* i relented, opened the window and coaxed it out.

Spoiler: * Homemade wasp killer

It's that time of year when wasps are out and non to docile.
So...
Homemade wasp killer that works better than just about anything you can buy. In a plastic spray bottle pour 10% washing up liquid, fill with water and mix gently (otherwise lots of foam). A quick spray of troublesome wasps instantly kills them. Itvworks by foaming up in the spiracles and the wasp cannot breath.

I got stung by dozens of yellow jackets when I was three. I still remember it to this day. Another time I was about 6, and got stung by about a dozen wasps. Nasty creatures.

 

[ChristineM]

I got stung by dozens of yellow jackets when I was three. I still remember it to this day. Another time I was about 6, and got stung by about a dozen wasps. Nasty creatures.

Owww. I bet you do still remember, when i was a little older i disturbed a hornet's nest. I was only stung by one (on the ear lobe), just the one hurt like nothing I'd felt before. I don't think ive ever run so fast.

I think it was this time last year i was stung on the toe by a wasp. As you say, nasty creatures.

I've avoided mass stingings up to now and hope to keep that score

 

[Stevicus]

Owww. I bet you do still remember, when i was a little older i disturbed a hornet's nest. I was only stung by one (on the ear lobe), just the one hurt like nothing I'd felt before. I don't think ive ever run so fast.

I think it was this time last year i was stung on the toe by a wasp. As you say, nasty creatures.

I've avoided mass stingings up to now and hope to keep that score

We were staying some cabin at a small lake in northern New York State. I was playing on some boulders embedded into the ground, and apparently there was a nest wedged in between that I didn't see. I was wearing shorts, but my dad pulled them down and a bunch of wasps flew out. They rushed me to a nearby clinic where I was examined and determined to be okay.

That was the summer of 1967. I learned years later that they called it the "summer of love," but it wasn't really like that for me. On the same trip, we went up to another cabin by the St. Lawrence River. My brother and I were swimming in the river, and I felt a drop off and went underwater. That was scary; felt like I was going to drown. I think my dad pulled me up.

My parents, grandparents, and older brother went to Expo '67 in Montreal, but they didn't let me go. I guess they figured I'd cause some sort of disaster.

Later on, we traveled to Maine, and stayed at a motel which had a slanted parking lot, which was next to a fence, a cliff, and the Atlantic Ocean. While my parents were unloading the car, I somehow got into the driver's seat and released the brake. As the car went downwards towards the fence, my dad ran after it and got in and stopped it.