I stopped believing in God after I was finally honest with myself and accepted the painful truth that my faith in a loving, merciful God wasn't compatible with the reality that I had suffered abuse while I was growing up, and I've had to deal with the traumatic emotional effects of that abuse ever since. I believed in God when I was growing up because that's what I was indoctrinated to believe, despite being abused by my adopted mother, who's a Christian. My adopted father and my adopted extended family, who are also Christians, always looked the other way. And in spite of being abused and bullied, I became a Christian myself when I was 17, and I was a devout Christian for thirty years. I can honestly say that being a Christian was an absolutely miserable and depressing experience for me.
There was no peace and joy in my life, as was promised in the Bible to those who accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. Despite my faith in God and my sincere devotion to him, I was an empty shell, going through the motions. Long story short, I no longer believe in God, and I've renounced my Christian faith. I chose to share my story of being abused as a child (
click here) in the hopes that my story will help other survivors of childhood abuse, and my story of childhood abuse is intertwined with my decision to renounce my faith (
click here). I share my story of leaving Christianity in the hopes that it might inspire others who are thinking of leaving Christianity, or perhaps inspire people who have already left and need reassurance. I can honestly say that letting go of my belief and faith in God is the best decision that I've ever made for myself and for my mental health. My only regret is that I should have done this years ago.