So, if a believing a lie makes someone a better person then it is unassailable?
I have no idea what you're talking about.
if a system keeps people from thinking for themselves and yet those people are well-behaved then the system is good?
I'm not talking about the systems that keep people from thinking for themselves. There are many churches whose foundation is based upon people questioning as they make their journeys of faith.
I don't understand what you mean by "ruined."
In part, betrayed to the point that cynicism unbalances any hope of making fair assessments.
To me, the word applies to any system that is based on sub-human concepts of forgiveness and mercy
See? I think most everyone would agree that forgiveness and mercy are not sub-human concepts, but rather traits of higher being.
or that begin with telling people that they are inherently bad
A good system celebrates the goodness in which humanity was created.
or that they are sinful or whatever.
Being pulled up short by reality is also a good thing.
Making people feel guilty all the time is not healthy.
There's a big difference between guilt and shame. Guilt can be a very constructive emotion, because it causes us to pull up short and make positive changes. Shame (internalized guilt) is never healthy. So, "feeling guilty all the time" is probably better described as "shaming people." And that
isn't healthy. Happily, there are systems where this doesn't happen.
Every traditional service is centered on the Eucharist and full of "lord have mercy" cries.
There's a difference between the Eucharist and the Kyrie. The Kyrie is said at the time of confession, after which is a proclamation of forgiveness (you must have missed that part).
The Eucharist takes place as a completely different service (in the traditional model you describe above). Kyrie is located within the Service of the Word. Eucharist is central in the Service of Eucharist. The word
eucharist means "to give thanks." So, Eucharist (the central act of traditional worship, is celebratory and an act of thanks. None of that has anything to do with "I'm a bad toad."
Every Protestant service has at its core the need for Christ because man in "fallen" and can't get up on his own.
Not every Protestant service. Some do emphasize that. Others emphasize the work of salvation, in which humanity has been reconciled to God, and now abides in a different state of being.
It's all lies and manipulation and control.
Some of it is. Some of it isn't. As I said, don't throw the baby out with the bath water.
How can such things fail to ruin a person?
Only by the grace of God. Again, happily, "such things" are not universal within Xy.