Why are people afraid of their beliefs being questioned ?

[psychoslice]

You know that the sun has risen, that it is day. You don’t say, “I strongly believe that this is sunrise,” you simply say, “I know this is sunrise.” You don’t say, “I strongly believe, nobody can shake my belief.” If you say it people will think you are crazy. If you say it people will think you must be blind; But you who cling to your beliefs, you are not seeing the sun, you have only heard about it. Others must have told you and you are saying, “I believe strongly.” Just to protect yourself you create a great armour around yourself.

 

[Father Heathen]

So... can I set up surveillance cameras in your living space to monitor you twenty-four seven, then? Just curious.

So expressing doubt towards another's claims is similar to invading their privacy?

 

[Quintessence]

So expressing doubt towards another's claims is similar to invading their privacy?

In a fashion, but you didn't say "doubt" before, you said "critique and scrutiny" which isn't quite the same thing. I don't think it is at all unreasonable for people to not welcome critique and scrutiny in any aspect of their life, and I don't think such reactions necessarily stem from that person being "insecure" or "lacking confidence." This is especially the case when "critique and scrutiny" is a cover for put-downs, proselytization, or harassment. Perhaps they want others to mind their own business? Perhaps they'd rather be loved and accepted for who and what they are instead of subjected to interrogative queries? Perhaps it just isn't that important to them and they just don't care enough to have the conversation? Or perhaps the social context for the conversation is inappropriate and they don't want to talk now? Maybe they're poor communicators? What if they're just quiet and not all that conversational in terms of personality? Yet of all these options - and there are no doubt more I didn't think of - we seize on "oh, they must be insecure!"

Sorry, no dice. Again, I won't disagree that in some cases, resistance to discussion means a lack of conviction or solid grounding in one's philosophies. To say that anyone who doesn't want to talk about it lacks conviction doesn't stand up to... well... scrutiny.

 

[Quintessence]

Which one would rubber fall under?

There's a really dirty joke in here somewhere, but I probably shouldn't say it. :areyoucra

I know I presented a false dichotomy there.

The main point of the dichotomy was to point out that it ain't necessarily a bad thing for something to be destroyed. If someone's convictions are "weak" then there's probably something else out there that can serve them better. It's not a bad thing for "weakness" to exist. "Weakness" allows room for growth. Rigid strength often times does not. It stagnates.

 

[psychoslice]

In a fashion, but you didn't say "doubt" before, you said "critique and scrutiny" which isn't quite the same thing. I don't think it is at all unreasonable for people to not welcome critique and scrutiny in any aspect of their life, and I don't think such reactions necessarily stem from that person being "insecure" or "lacking confidence." This is especially the case when "critique and scrutiny" is a cover for put-downs, proselytization, or harassment. Perhaps they want others to mind their own business? Perhaps they'd rather be loved and accepted for who and what they are instead of subjected to interrogative queries? Perhaps it just isn't that important to them and they just don't care enough to have the conversation? Or perhaps the social context for the conversation is inappropriate and they don't want to talk now? Maybe they're poor communicators? What if they're just quiet and not all that conversational in terms of personality? Yet of all these options - and there are no doubt more I didn't think of - we seize on "oh, they must be insecure!"

Sorry, no dice. Again, I won't disagree that in some cases, resistance to discussion means a lack of conviction or solid grounding in one's philosophies. To say that anyone who doesn't want to talk about it lacks conviction doesn't stand up to... well... scrutiny.

I can see your point, but those who cannot understand peoples beliefs, or wonder how om earth they could believe in such things, have the right to question those beliefs, if those beliefs seem ridicules then also they have the right to say so. Like I think believing in faeries is completely silly, and I have the right to say so, as someone else has the right to say they believe in such things.

 

[psychoslice]

There's a really dirty joke in here somewhere, but I probably shouldn't say it. :areyoucra

I know I presented a false dichotomy there.

The main point of the dichotomy was to point out that it ain't necessarily a bad thing for something to be destroyed. If someone's convictions are "weak" then there's probably something else out there that can serve them better. It's not a bad thing for "weakness" to exist. "Weakness" allows room for growth. Rigid strength often times does not. It stagnates.

Yes and this is a reason to listen to those who see differently than you, who knows they might save you a lot of heartache in your treasured beliefs, you may realize that your beliefs are ridicules.

 

[psychoslice]

Please understand that I am not in anyway against people and their beliefs, but I am against those who come to a forum and expect no one to question their beliefs, that would be childish. If you come to a forum and want everyone to agree with you, then why the hell would you do that, you may as well stay in your little world with you little beliefs, at least you will be protected.

 

[psychoslice]

 

[sarek]

Beliefs(religious and otherwise) often become crystallised inside a persons Ego. The Ego is there mainly out of self preservation. If you attack a part of a persons Ego, you are perceived as launching an existential attack on their selves.

 

[Quintessence]

I can see your point, but those who cannot understand peoples beliefs, or wonder how om earth they could believe in such things, have the right to question those beliefs, if those beliefs seem ridicules then also they have the right to say so. Like I think believing in faeries is completely silly, and I have the right to say so, as someone else has the right to say they believe in such things.

Sure, at least in a country where freedom of speech is recognized. You even have license to be a complete dick about it... at least until you cross the line where your freedom of speech becomes slander, bullying, or harassment.

Yes and this is a reason to listen to those who see differently than you, who knows they might save you a lot of heartache in your treasured beliefs, you may realize that your beliefs are ridicules.

There's another dimension to it though, that I neglected to note. "Weak" structures are not better than "strong" structures at all. There are plenty of reasons not to listen and there are plenty of reasons to listen; much depends on context and personal values.

I have no problem with people who want to build a solid, lasting structure that resists change. Tradition has value and beauty, and watching people chip away from it is analogous to people defacing a historic building just because it doesn't look modern enough to their tastes. Let the people who value their stable traditions have them, and leave them alone to their ways.

I have no problem with people who want to live in a cardboard box either. Malleability and mobility can have its benefits, and laughing at the guy in his cardboard box like he should have a "real" house is just mean-spirited. Let people have their cardboard boxes. If it gets blown over in a windstorm, it's easy for them to find another one.

 

[NobodyYouKnow]

Religion is one of those big taboo topics that many people are terrified to touch: too afraid that others will question their religious loyalties and just as afraid to step on the minefield that is the overhyped sensitivity of some believers.

People, after all, live and die in the names of religious values, so the stakes of what we are playing with couldn’t be any higher. And yet, few fields can make many human beings as unwilling to face the evidence as religion. It is exactly because these ideas are so central to their lives that they don’t want anyone to plant doubts in their minds.

So, is religion really for the weak minded, is it just a crutch for those who need something to just believe in, something to make their life worth living, then if this is so, should we or not still questions these peoples beliefs, or should we just leave them where they are happy in their beliefs. Then again if these people don’t like their beliefs questioned, why in the world would they join a forum where we should be free to question others beliefs.

I have been in trouble many times on forums from questioning mainly Christians beliefs, its so frustrating, I can question most other belief systems with no problem, but again when its Christians all hell brakes out.

So should I just keep my big mouth shut and say nothing, or should I tiptoe around egg shells trying no to say the wrong words, as I said its frustrating.

It is sometimes because either people feel 'insecure' within their own Faith, either that, or they believe something personally and so much so, that their way (and what their scriptures say) is the only 'right way' or the only way.

It's like a doctor prescribing medicine. That which is for one 'ailment' may not suit another with a different one.

I used to get annoyed and all 'defensive', but I also realise that 'God is on my side' (for lack of a better phrase). There is nothing to doubt and nothing to fear.

Thus, people can criticise me all they like...they can criticise my God and I don't care. Why should I? it matters not in the end...people will fade in and out of your life...you may not even see that person tomorrow, or ever again, so why worry?

A lot of times, it leads to others totally ignoring you when they realise that nothing they do will change who you are unless you want to change, or are willing to change...

A lot of times people just 'accept' it so they won't feel bad about it..

 

[NobodyYouKnow]

Anyone truly confident and secure in their beliefs should welcome critique and scrutiny.

Precisely. I posted my answer before I read yours...but precisely.

 

[Truth_Faith13]

Religion is one of those big taboo topics that many people are terrified to touch: too afraid that others will question their religious loyalties and just as afraid to step on the minefield that is the overhyped sensitivity of some believers.

People, after all, live and die in the names of religious values, so the stakes of what we are playing with couldn’t be any higher. And yet, few fields can make many human beings as unwilling to face the evidence as religion. It is exactly because these ideas are so central to their lives that they don’t want anyone to plant doubts in their minds.

So, is religion really for the weak minded, is it just a crutch for those who need something to just believe in, something to make their life worth living, then if this is so, should we or not still questions these peoples beliefs, or should we just leave them where they are happy in their beliefs. Then again if these people don’t like their beliefs questioned, why in the world would they join a forum where we should be free to question others beliefs.

I have been in trouble many times on forums from questioning mainly Christians beliefs, its so frustrating, I can question most other belief systems with no problem, but again when its Christians all hell brakes out.

So should I just keep my big mouth shut and say nothing, or should I tiptoe around egg shells trying no to say the wrong words, as I said its frustrating.

I think it depends on your personality and the person you are talking to personality. A lot is based on perspective whether that be right or wrong; for example sometimes when my husband is "passionately" explaining something, I can hear an angry/aggressive tone in his voice...he insists he isn't, he is just explaining his point...but I can see that if I was talking to someone I didn't know well, I could easily take offence.

Everyone thinks they are the ones who have the right answer, so it's never going to be an easy ride when you have people with differing views in the same room. No matter how hard you emphasise - "I am just stating my perspective in a non judgemental, non biased way"...someone, somewhere will take offence.

Again my husband (who is atheist) is a classic example...at my church a friend may invite us around for dinner..now whether consciously or not....he will respond in a less enthusiastic/defensive way...if its one of his friends..he jumped at it...now fundamentally there is no difference..both are just friends inviting you over for dinner..however throw the Christian/atheist mix in there and he automatically mentally assumes his belief (or lack of) is going to be questioned making him defensive....it's all perspective...

 

[psychoslice]

Beliefs(religious and otherwise) often become crystallised inside a persons Ego. The Ego is there mainly out of self preservation. If you attack a part of a persons Ego, you are perceived as launching an existential attack on their selves.

Yes and all along the ego really is only an illusion, the ego is only our story, as long as our story goes the way we want it to, then we are happy, but question that story and watch out.

 

[nazz]

To answer your question I'm not

 

[Jainarayan]

Anyone truly confident and secure in their beliefs should welcome critique and scrutiny.

Or ignore it.

 

[psychoslice]

Sure, at least in a country where freedom of speech is recognized. You even have license to be a complete dick about it... at least until you cross the line where your freedom of speech becomes slander, bullying, or harassment.



There's another dimension to it though, that I neglected to note. "Weak" structures are not better than "strong" structures at all. There are plenty of reasons not to listen and there are plenty of reasons to listen; much depends on context and personal values.

I have no problem with people who want to build a solid, lasting structure that resists change. Tradition has value and beauty, and watching people chip away from it is analogous to people defacing a historic building just because it doesn't look modern enough to their tastes. Let the people who value their stable traditions have them, and leave them alone to their ways.

I have no problem with people who want to live in a cardboard box either. Malleability and mobility can have its benefits, and laughing at the guy in his cardboard box like he should have a "real" house is just mean-spirited. Let people have their cardboard boxes. If it gets blown over in a windstorm, it's easy for them to find another one.

Yes I have no problem with whatever people want to do, that's not my point, what i am saying is why don't these people like to have their beliefs questioned on a forum, that is what a forum such as this one is all about.

If you tell me there is a god, then i'll question you where is this god, where is you evidence, if you have non then why believe in a god, its really that simple . If your going to mouth of about something and you cannot prove it then why on earth join a forum, why on earth even bring it up. Of course if you want to just talk to those who believe what you believe in and are not going to question your beliefs, then do that, protect you treasured beliefs, hide behind them.

 

[psychoslice]

It is sometimes because either people feel 'insecure' within their own Faith, either that, or they believe something personally and so much so, that their way (and what their scriptures say) is the only 'right way' or the only way.

It's like a doctor prescribing medicine. That which is for one 'ailment' may not suit another with a different one.

I used to get annoyed and all 'defensive', but I also realise that 'God is on my side' (for lack of a better phrase). There is nothing to doubt and nothing to fear.

Thus, people can criticise me all they like...they can criticise my God and I don't care. Why should I? it matters not in the end...people will fade in and out of your life...you may not even see that person tomorrow, or ever again, so why worry?

A lot of times, it leads to others totally ignoring you when they realise that nothing they do will change who you are unless you want to change, or are willing to change...

A lot of times people just 'accept' it so they won't feel bad about it..

Yea i feel the same way, because I do not have any belief system, whatever you say to me will not stick. I have been told that i am trying to convert others, my god what on earth could I convert them to when I have no beliefs myself. Then the belief in a religion with no beliefs does sound interesting lol.

 

[psychoslice]

I think it depends on your personality and the person you are talking to personality. A lot is based on perspective whether that be right or wrong; for example sometimes when my husband is "passionately" explaining something, I can hear an angry/aggressive tone in his voice...he insists he isn't, he is just explaining his point...but I can see that if I was talking to someone I didn't know well, I could easily take offence.

Everyone thinks they are the ones who have the right answer, so it's never going to be an easy ride when you have people with differing views in the same room. No matter how hard you emphasise - "I am just stating my perspective in a non judgemental, non biased way"...someone, somewhere will take offence.

Again my husband (who is atheist) is a classic example...at my church a friend may invite us around for dinner..now whether consciously or not....he will respond in a less enthusiastic/defensive way...if its one of his friends..he jumped at it...now fundamentally there is no difference..both are just friends inviting you over for dinner..however throw the Christian/atheist mix in there and he automatically mentally assumes his belief (or lack of) is going to be questioned making him defensive....it's all perspective...

Yes no one really has the right answer, that is one thing i like to point out, but then there are those who believe they have all the answers because it all came from their god, its been approved and stamped by the one you can never argue against, well that is what they believe, and these are the ones I am talking about.

 

[Vinayaka]

Yes I have no problem with whatever people want to do, that's not my point, what i am saying is why don't these people like to have their beliefs questioned on a forum, that is what a forum such as this one is all about.

Surely that's not the only reason forums exist.

There are some reasonable reasons people don't want to be questioned:

- It's been done a million times before by others before you and the person is just plain sick of it.
- It's a set-up for name-calling, or way for the questioner to express their viewpoint, not legitimate curious questioning at all.
- The questioner's intent is to rile, not learn.
- The person hold the belief that sacred is secret, secret is sacred, and doesn't want to share.
- Some of the answers might come across as bragging or otherwise pompous behaviour, and the person being questioned is too humble to get into that.

- just some thoughts.