Advice on possible stripping career please

[3.14]

do you dare show a picture on this forum, dressed?
because if you are to shy about that then stripping will be extremly tricky

btw would you care if your parents found out?, because most people can handle a bunch a strangers looking at them but freak out if there parents knew

ps
poledancing is harder then it looks you need a strong body to handle it


pps
prostitution isn't that bad either it also has a bad name,
if you apply for decent whorehouses you could make a pretty decent living

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Excellent point there BB.

If I wasn't breaking myself in two right now it would easier as well.

I told him he doesn't have to worry about it for at least 6 months. That's how long it will take me to get tightened up, and by then if I still think it's the best option I'm going for it regardless. I'm not going to be the one proactively dumping anyone. He's trying to pass the buck to me ya see, when it is ultimately his decision how he would deal. He needs to weigh my pros and cons as he sees me as a girlfriend. If stripping is the straw that breaks his back then he shouldn't be with me anyway. If the only real con would be stripping and he'd make it the deal breaker regardless of how perfect he sees everything else about us, I shouldn't be with him maybe. I truly believe I have the will power to go through with being involved in a dirty business like this and come out of it without any problems or personality changes. So many times bf's and gf's anticipate possible changes and make decisions based on them actually happening. Or they believe them into existance.

 

[3.14]

wel there will be additude change's but thats with any job

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

do you dare show a picture on this forum, dressed?
because if you are to shy about that then stripping will be extremly tricky

My best friends and I growing up were borderline nudists. LOL. We were naked everywhere. My neighbor/bff and I would always hang out at her house cause her dad was never home, and just lounge around butt naked, eat mac n cheese and watch mtv. We'd sneak into the neighbors pools at night and skinny dip while they were on vacation, and on occasion even race around the neighborhood at night streaking.

btw would you care if your parents found out?, because most people can handle a bunch a strangers looking at them but freak out if there parents knew

My dad doesn't care as long as I stay safe and don't commit that slippery slope fallacy. We have something more like a father-son relationship rather than father-daughter. I've already gotten his limited approval.

ps
poledancing is harder then it looks you need a strong body to handle it

Oh I know I've been checking it out and I can't wait to start doing the excerisises! I've done gymnastics, tap, pointe ballet, jazz, hip-hop, belly dancing, martial arts... I can't wait to try something new. I'm just a tad outa shape. 130 lbs when I should be 110-115. I can tighten up. I don't plan in jumping in over night and breaking my neck. I just overanalyze things way in advance sometimes...

pps
prostitution isn't that bad either it also has a bad name,
if you apply for decent whorehouses you could make a pretty decent living

Right.

I don't even think I'd do that in a country where it was legal with regulations and protection.

This will be like belly dancing in my underwear, but with cool pole tricks, no skirt and sometimes no top.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

wel there will be additude change's but thats with any job

Yeah. The ones I've had with sales/customer service and waitressing are definitely not desireable. I come into too close of contact with enough filth, scum and abuse to make me dam near lose all respect for my species. It's always just those few that make it bearable and remind me we are not all malicious idiots. I do believe my lack of respect/patience with the public will help me stay strong in not wanting anyones hands on me though. lol. Like I said elsewhere, I think I take more abuse as of right now. I feel deeply dehumanized in some way almost every day. I don't have any bouncers or the power to have someone thrown out of my vicinity head first.

 

[Comicaze247]

I'd think that if any future boss found out, they would probably have to fire you. Unless you plan on starting your regular dayjob in another state on the other side of the continent, I'd suggest not doing it. Maybe modeling, as that's considered more elegant.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

I'd think that if any future boss found out, they would probably have to fire you. Unless you plan on starting your regular dayjob in another state on the other side of the continent, I'd suggest not doing it. Maybe modeling, as that's considered more elegant.

Hmmm.......

I wonder how low profile I could make that on a resume... I'm sure I could just list the position as "Cocktail Waitress" and leave off the "Dancer" part.

When some of the dancers were working but not dancing they were just cocktail waitresses. Not topless or anything. Just in a cute outfit.

Keep in mind that it seemed optional if even the dancers were topless. That could be categoried under "Dancer" or "performer," since they are technically not stripping anything off.

Hm. Hm. Thanks.

EDIT: Ya know in some ways modeling might be worse. With stripping the only verbal judgments you get are socially based. When you are performing your audience tends to appreciate your body even if it's not perfect. Models are made so borderline paranoid/self-conscious about their body... they constantly get critique'd and judged on every little detail. Hard drugs are also very prevalent in professional modeling as well. It has the potential and is commonly dirty-dirty from what I understant. And if modeling leads to any acting they have to make films naked and doing embarrassing and dirty sexual things if it's part of it!! Sometimes proffessional models have to tasteful shoots (not porn), topless or bottomless as well. Besides, it's way too competitive in nature anyway. It has to make the girls a little crazy.

No thanks! I'll take the less pressure, private stage, with no camera option and just ignore whatever drugs are around like I've been doing for so long. lol

 

[3.14]

how about delivery person for a high priced industry

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

I'm going to brainstorm on what I'm going to do if my sweetie can't deal and I decide it's in my best interest/investment to follow through....

There has to be some way we can reach a compromise, I can restore whatever security he's lacking, and make him feel that he he part of my goals as well (cause he is). We've been good friends for over 6 years. He's the best bf I've ever had and I love him too much to let him go so quickly/easily.

Hmmm.... I could open up a savings account with both our names on it and put all the money in it. He could help me manage it which might make him feel more indirectly included and in control. He definitely needs more attention, which isn't a problem. I'll just have to suck it up and find the energy. He could apply for a job to be one of the bouncers... lol. I know it screws with guys heads when they are with a girl that is more stable and makes more money than they do. They have that need/desire to be the one taking care of the girl ya know? I already make more money than him and have to take him everywhere, and if I did this it would be this compound of me doing something that tampers with his sensibilities anyway, AND me making even more money than him.

So yeah, I understand completely. There has to be actions and behaviors I can implement to help him reach some sort of compromise though.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

how about delivery person for a high priced industry

Ha ha!

"Gentlemens Club Delivery Lady"

 

[Trey of Diamonds]

Some more thoughts on becoming a Stripper.

So your boyfriend isn’t all that thrilled, sorry to hear that. And for all those folks who are saying to ignore his concerns that is not an option. If the two of you are in a real relationship then you have a partnership and his feelings and concerns are as important to the relationship as yours are. While it is your body and your life, the relationship belongs to both of you. If you consider the relationship as a contract between too parties, you are effectively renegotiating the conditions of the contract. While very difficult, it is best to try and discuss the situation and don’t try to resolve it too quickly. Such a change will take time to adjust to and while his immediate response is no way, given time to think on it he may come around. But backing him into a corner could solidify the opinion and pride will not let him change it. Plant the seed and let it grow.

As for the job itself, I recommend going to the old Pros and Cons list but try categorizing it. It might shed some new light on it. I break the human condition up into three aspects; the physical, the mental and the spiritual (emotional). So work up a Pros and Cons for each of these aspects, here is a start.

The Physical
Pros
You will be in the best shape ever. The workout that stripping gives your body is amazing.

Cons
Drugs. You will be surrounded by drugs and there will be some peer pressure to take them. Also, some management sees drug addiction as a method of control.
Injury. There is always a danger that someone will take to much of an interest in you and it could lead to physical harm.

Mental
Pros
Money. You can makes lots of money doing this.

Cons
Hard to think of a Con on the Mental side.

The Spiritual (Emotional)
Pros
Hard to think of a Pro on the Spiritual side.

Cons
Being a Stripper can make you Jaded. You are constantly exposed to the worst side of humanity. So much exposure can wear you down and cause you to generally see the worst in people rather than the best. The exact same thing happens to cops, just look at their divorce rate. I think this is the most dangerous aspect of the job.

Now, take this and add what you can think of to it and maybe it will help you in your decision, or help to show your boyfriend that you are considering all aspects of the situation and not just going into it blind.

Hope that is helpful.

 

[darkendless]

So your boyfriend isn’t all that thrilled, sorry to hear that. And for all those folks who are saying to ignore his concerns that is not an option. If the two of you are in a real relationship then you have a partnership and his feelings and concerns are as important to the relationship as yours are. While it is your body and your life, the relationship belongs to both of you. If you consider the relationship as a contract between too parties, you are effectively renegotiating the conditions of the contract. While very difficult, it is best to try and discuss the situation and don’t try to resolve it too quickly. Such a change will take time to adjust to and while his immediate response is no way, given time to think on it he may come around. But backing him into a corner could solidify the opinion and pride will not let him change it. Plant the seed and let it grow.

If my partner was to do such a thing i'd be horrified. Honestly, i think a main concern is men in the club seeing you only as a sexual object. It would be hard in a serious relationship because it could go against the foundations of your relationship. Another point is, can you put a price on your dignity? Is the money worth the stress on your relationship? As a male myself, i know its hard to come to terms with some things until they happen. As a youngin also, it seems unjustified to stop our female partners doing what they want to do no matter how much we object. Its a vicious circle.

Cons
Hard to think of a Con on the Mental side.

People react differently in given situations.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Now, take this and add what you can think of to it and maybe it will help you in your decision, or help to show your boyfriend that you are considering all aspects of the situation and not just going into it blind.

Hope that is helpful.

Thanks!!! You are awesome. Great advice. Here we go:

The Physical
Pros
You will be in the best shape ever. The workout that stripping gives your body is amazing.

Cons
Drugs. You will be surrounded by drugs and there will be some peer pressure to take them. Also, some management sees drug addiction as a method of control.
Injury. There is always a danger that someone will take to much of an interest in you and it could lead to physical harm.

Mental
Pros
Money. You can makes lots of money doing this.

Confidence. From the research I've done, some girls become more confident and self-empowered after stage dancing.


Cons
Hard to think of a Con on the Mental side.

Potential for addiction to easy money, leading to other avenues for more money.

Every club is different.


The Spiritual (Emotional)
Pros
Hard to think of a Pro on the Spiritual side.

I have read from girls online who are in nice locations like this one seems to be, that they are treated like goddesses. Protected by bouncers, showing off thier talent and body, in full control, no touching, and having money thrown at them. Nice to tap into that spark of divinity


Cons
Being a Stripper can make you Jaded. You are constantly exposed to the worst side of humanity. So much exposure can wear you down and cause you to generally see the worst in people rather than the best. The exact same thing happens to cops, just look at their divorce rate. I think this is the most dangerous aspect of the job.

Overblown ego if the above pro turns out to be true.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Honestly, i think a main concern is men in the club seeing you only as a sexual object. It would be hard in a serious relationship because it could go against the foundations of your relationship.

I know!! Ack. The relationship is the hardest element.

As far as sexual object... my last bf treated me that way. Customers now treat me that way. You know how many times I've been grabbed or said nasty things to now? It's sad. It's nasty people. There didn't seem to be many nasty people at this place. That was another thing I liked. When we walked in the sign said "Appropriate Dress Required." We were coming from the beach and wearing flip flops, so I was polite about it and asked what appropriate dress was. He said,"Oh you all are fine. That's just what we use to not let people in if we don't like them or thier atitude." So they scan people at the door. Pretty cool.

Another point is, can you put a price on your dignity?

What dignity:sarcastic? lol.

Is the money worth the stress on your relationship?

Still working on that. I've had so many bf's pull me down and impede on progress and just flat out destroy things I've worked my *** off for.... I think in too many ways I might also be jaded.

People react differently in given situations.

Yeah.... that is what on one side makes life exciting and uniqe and on the other causes unexpected problems.

 

[3.14]

btw will you turn pro with stripping if the opportunity presents itself? (pro as in full job not side job)

 

[darkendless]

I know!! Ack. The relationship is the hardest element.

Relationships are never easy at the best of times. Men are from mars and women from venus.

As far as sexual object... my last bf treated me that way. Customers now treat me that way. You know how many times I've been grabbed or said nasty things to now? It's sad. It's nasty people. There didn't seem to be many nasty people at this place. That was another thing I liked. When we walked in the sign said "Appropriate Dress Required." We were coming from the beach and wearing flip flops, so I was polite about it and asked what appropriate dress was. He said,"Oh you all are fine. That's just what we use to not let people in if we don't like them or thier atitude." So they scan people at the door. Pretty cool.

There are some disgusting individuals out there. Men are generally all the same to a degree, no matter where they bought their suit from. They wouldn't be in a strip club if they weren't out for a gawk at some young womens breasts.
Your last BF is your ex for a reason, is it fair on your current BF because you've been in such a situation before?

What dignity:sarcastic? lol.

As long as you're ok with being viewed as a sexual object. From your BF's perspective though, do you really think he's ok with you taking your top off in front of strangers who are in that place for that reason?
In my experience, and i don't speak for all males here, but if your relationship is serious, either he is not letting out his true feelings, or maybe other things are on his mind? Thats just how i see it, i could well be very wrong.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

btw will you turn pro with stripping if the opportunity presents itself? (pro as in full job not side job)

Heck no! The benefits suck. When you get too old you're screwed, and that is definitly not somethint I would thing you would want to retire from alone...

although I have heard of girls doing it for a few years, saving all thier money, nd having enough for retirement.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Your last BF is your ex for a reason, is it fair on your current BF because you've been in such a situation before?

No it's really not. I realize in a lot of ways I am probably at least mildly jaded, and as much as I try to control it I'm sure it still leaks out in some ways... like this:

"Screw you I'm not letting you hold me back like all those other guys... You wanna be a lazy ***, have me break my back and then shut me down when I find a way around it? Hell no."

I didn't say that but it's what I was thinking.

 

[9-10ths_Penguin]

Hmmm.......

I wonder how low profile I could make that on a resume... I'm sure I could just list the position as "Cocktail Waitress" and leave off the "Dancer" part.

When some of the dancers were working but not dancing they were just cocktail waitresses. Not topless or anything. Just in a cute outfit.

Keep in mind that it seemed optional if even the dancers were topless. That could be categoried under "Dancer" or "performer," since they are technically not stripping anything off.

Hm. Hm. Thanks.

Chronological holes in your resume will be a big red flag to a potential employer and so is being less than truthful on a resume, so if you're planning to omit stripping from your resume, you should think about what you'll put in there. Coming up with a fake job title might backfire if they call your former employers and your old boss says "what? No, she wasn't a waitress, she was an exotic dancer" or something like that.

An employer may or may not care about the fact that you made a living stripping; virtually all of them will care about whether they can consider you an honest person. Some employers might throw your resume in the trash if they see "stripper" on it; all of them will throw it out if they think you falsified anything.

If you plan to continue with one of the other jobs you have now or keep at your school courses at a reasonable rate, that would give something to put in that resume "hole" without having to rely on the good nature of your prospective boss at the gentleman's club.

 

[darkendless]

No it's really not. I realize in a lot of ways I am probably at least mildly jaded, and as much as I try to control it I'm sure it still leaks out in some ways... like this:

"Screw you I'm not letting you hold me back like all those other guys... You wanna be a lazy ***, have me break my back and then shut me down when I find a way around it? Hell no."

I didn't say that but it's what I was thinking.

He's protecting his interests like anybody would. Can you blame him for being upset about this?

My advice is, if you still want to pursue such a career, is to check out the place numerous times, just to confirm and misgivings you may have. Perhaps if you do take the chance, get your boyfriend to go with you to work the first few times? Although it may compound the jealousy it may also relieve the worst of his suspicion?

I'm sorry by the way, i'm not full over very positive advice am i, its all gloomy and negative