Click here for happiness!

[Geoff-Allen]

To a certain degree all people wrestle with what is. We have an intolerance for things the way they are and so we want to change it. This tendency is a beautiful thing because it makes our lives and our world improve. If we tolerated the fact that we could not fly, we would never have invented the airplane for example. However, some of us don’t simply wrestle with what is. We are warriors. We fight what is as if our survival depends on it. Our unwillingness to accept what is, is a great source of suffering, especially when we can’t change certain things about what is. And in fact, it prevents us from getting what we need and want.

In a universe based on the law of mirroring (otherwise known as the law of attraction) whatever we resist, persists because in resisting something, we are focused directly upon it. And the primary form that resistance takes is the unwillingness to accept ‘what is’ as reality. For example, lets say that someone you love dies. The reality is that they are dead. The reality is that you are heartbroken and grieving. But instead of accepting what is so, you go immediately into resistance to what is. You spend your energy focusing on how it could have been prevented. You spend your energy on who is to blame for it. You spend your time on how it isn’t ok to grieve so you have to find a way to feel better as fast as possible. You spend your energy focusing on what it means about you and your future. None of this brings the person you love back to life. None of this changes the fact that you are heartbroken and grieving. All of this is simply a fight with what is. The tension you feel while trying to change what has happened instead of accepting it, is resistance.

Read more here -

Accept It! The Key to Letting Go of Resistance

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Another book to add to our list -

365 Life Shifts

All the best!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Happiness inner critic - for example -

It would be nice if the Inner Critic, what I call the Judge, would go away in a one step process. That rarely happens. There have been a couple people that might have done it. Eckhart Tolle, or Byron Katie, maybe, but I don’t know their personal process in detail to say. They may have still had extra cleanup work on their mind to do once their big shift happened. For the rest of us normal humans that want our Judge to calm down, or even become completely reformed, there is work that can get it done.

What I have learned through my own process, and guiding others, is two important things. One, is that it can be done. You can tame your Inner Critic so that it is a kind ally instead of a punishing bully. The second thing is that the change is most effectively done in steps and accomplished through practice.

Comes from this site -

The Inner Critic cam be tamed and calm down | Pathway to Happiness

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Here are 30 prompts, questions and ideas to explore in your journal to get to know yourself better.

My favorite way to spend the day is…

If I could talk to my teenage self, the one thing I would say is…

The two moments I’ll never forget in my life are ... Describe them in great detail, and what makes them so unforgettable.

Make a list of 30 things that make you smile.

“Write about a moment experienced through your body. Making love, making breakfast, going to a party, having a fight, an experience you’ve had or you imagine for your character. Leave out thought and emotion, and let all information be conveyed through the body and senses.” (A prompt from Barbara Abercrombie’s creative book Kicking In The Wall: A Year of Writing Exercises, Prompts and Quotes To Help You Break Through Your Blocks And Reach Your Writing Goals.)

The words I’d like to live by are…

30 Journaling Prompts for Self-Reflection and Self-Discovery

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Can happiness hurt you? -

Can feeling good ever be bad? New research says yes—and points the way to a healthier, more balanced life

In recent years, we’ve seen an explosion of scientific research revealing precisely how positive feelings like happiness are good for us. We know that they motivate us to pursue important goals and overcome obstacles, protect us from some effects of stress, connect us closely with other people, and even stave off physical and mental ailments.

This has made happiness pretty trendy. The science of happiness made the covers of Time, Oprah, and even The Economist, and it has spawned a small industry of motivational speakers, psychotherapists, and research enterprises. This website, Greater Good, features roughly 400 articles about happiness, and its parenting blog is specifically about raising happy children.

Four Ways Happiness Can Hurt You

Another huge site!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Happiness sabotage conflict -

Everybody wants to know what they can do to be happier. We crave some combination of lessons, tricks, inspiration, goals, strategies, life-hacks, pills, or even apps that will add more happiness and wellbeing to our lives.

But what if finding happiness is less about what we should add and more about what we should subtract?

What if the smarter way to find your happiness is to focus on removing the things that make you unhappy?

6 Subtle Habits That Are Sabotaging Your Happiness | Nick Wignall

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Agile lean life happiness? -

If you’re reading this article you’re probably not a super happy person; or maybe you think you should be happier in life than you actually are.

I assume you already read dozens of articles listing “top ten things you should do” in life to be happier, and they surprisingly didn’t work. Probably you haven’t even tried those ten things, because you intuitively know they don’t work.

Well, let’s build up a case here, see why these things don’t work, with a ray of hope at the end of the blog post for how you may actually find your own piece of happiness in life. If you’re looking for any miraculous solutions, you can stop reading the article at this point.

Why you will never find happiness in life - AgileLeanLife

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Let go of the habits keeping you unhappy -

Accept things the way they are.

Again, apply this to every aspect of your life. Accept people for who they are and how they behave. Accept who you are. Accept the world for what it is. Once you accept things, you can look deeper and see things for what they really are.

Letting Go of the Attachments That Keep You Stuck & Unhappy

Enjoy!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Healthy strategies happiness -

Accept your emotions. “Some would argue that most of our physical, mental and relational problems come from our inability to adequately experience emotions,” Howes said. “We deny, bury, project, rationalize, medicate, drink away, smother in comfort food, sleep off, sweat out, suck (it) up and sweep under the rug our sadness, anger and fear.”

Some people spend more energy on avoiding their emotions than others do on actually feeling them, he said. So the key is to give yourself unconditional permission to feel your feelings. “When you feel safe enough to let your guard down, whether that’s alone or with someone you trust, you can focus on the situation, fully experience the feelings and may then be able to better understand why it hurts and what you want to do about the situation,” Howes said.

Writing about negative emotions also helps. According to clinical psychologist Darlene Mininni, research has shown that people who write about their deepest emotions are less depressed and more positive about life than before they started writing. To reap the benefits, it’s important to follow a few guidelines. Here’s Mininni’s emotional writing guide.

15 Tips to Boost Your Well-Being and Happiness

 

[Geoff-Allen]

If someone could ever bottle the secret to happiness, they could get rich selling it. But they never will. No one can sell you what you already have! No one can even give you what you already have. But, you can be reminded.

More here -

Marci Shimoff

 

[Geoff-Allen]

How To Be Happy: The Biggest (Free) Guide To Happiness

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Define what happiness means to you ...

Happiness. Ah, that ever-elusive state of mind that’s characterized by contentment, joy, satisfaction and pleasure. The United States holds the ideal in such high regard that “the pursuit of happiness” is seen as an inalienable human right, right alongside life and liberty in the Declaration of Independence.

No matter one’s creed, origin or social standing, we are all taught that striving to be happy is a hugely important aspect of life.

All of this being true, how does one actually obtain happiness? There seems to be no foolproof formula and the code of how to be happy and stay happy hasn't yet been deciphered.

What Does Happiness Mean To You?: 6 Ways To Reach A Positive State Of Mind

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

There are some simple rules in life. If you live in your negative past, you soon become bitter, depressed or overwhelmed by regret. It’s a double knockdown by life (tough past, tough present) and a challenging negative spiral. If you’re afraid of not controlling your future completely or repeating your past mistakes in the upcoming times, you become a very anxious person. And if you aren’t aware of your personal power that you always have in the present moment, you can become a too extreme hedonist or a fatalist, going only where life kicks you; and life often kicks you where you certainly don’t want to be.

Living in the past, living in the future or not being aware of your personal power in the present create a lot of pain in personal life. Emotional pain is, in a way, nothing but a kind of self-created inner resistance to external things that happened to you or are happening to you and you can’t control. You feel pain when you aren’t satisfied with how things are but don’t feel powerful enough to change them. You aren’t flexible enough, wise/rational enough or aware of the personal power that you possess in the present moment. The good news is that pain is most often an inner experience and, as I mentioned, a psychological resistance to the outer world, which means that you can do something about it and transform it. One way to do it is to live more in the present moment by developing wisdom and controlling your mind.

Comes from this site -

https://agileleanlife.com/living-in-the-present-moment/

Cheers!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

If you're looking for a new set of rules to live by for a happier life in 2019, then you've come to the right place!

Here are some rules that you can use as inspiration to steer your life in the best direction possible. They might not all feel right for you, but I'm sure you'll find a couple that you can focus on in 2019.

There are examples to show how you can use these rules to live a happier life. Something I noticed when researching this article is that a lot of the "best rules to live by" articles focus on only the rules, not how you can turn them into practice.

Read more here -

20 Rules To Live By For A Happier Life in 2019 [With Examples]

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Rules to live by happiness - tosses up a few ... eg -

Do Your Best to Avoid Drama.

To live a life free of conflict is nearly impossible, but I often find myself seeing the same people on social media who never seem to stop complaining about the same things, over and over again.

Eventually, when someone constantly finds themselves in the middle of turmoil, one must ask themselves what (or who) the common denominator is. Sometimes, conflict is caused by another person in your life who’s difficult to walk away from. Sometimes it may seem out of our control.

While it isn’t easy, it isn’t a coincidence that some people can never seem to escape the cycle. It’s all about the decisions we make along the way.

Follow These 7 Golden Rules for a Happy Life

All the best!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Happiness stop taking things personally -

Whenever I walk into an elevator and there’s already someone in there, I say “Buenas”, because that’s a cultural practice in Latin America. Most of the time people answer my greeting. But sometimes they don’t. And when they don’t, I don’t take it personally.

I used to take things personally all the time, but now, for the most part, I don’t. How did I stop takings things personally (or at least get much better at it)? I learned certain strategies, which I’m going to share with you. Below you’ll find eight ways to stop taking things personally.

8 Ways to Stop Taking Things Personally

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Here's a few shrink quotes -

More similar writers here -

TOP 18 QUOTES BY HARRY STACK SULLIVAN | A-Z Quotes

Enjoy!

 

[Geoff-Allen]

 

[Geoff-Allen]

 

[Geoff-Allen]

Sogyal too painful accept reality

One common form of resistance is people rejecting their emotions. For instance, a husband might resist feeling angry towards his wife, though the anger is genuinely there. So, he experiences an inner conflict about his anger—on top of continuing to feel angry.

It’s not unusual for people to be critical of their emotions when they think they are wrong for feeling a particular way. However, emotions can’t be wrong—they just are. Saying your emotions are wrong is like saying you were born with the wrong color hair. You might prefer to be a blonde (something you can change—at least temporarily—with a bottle), but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong to be a brunette. Similarly, the husband feels angry, which is neither right nor wrong.

From this site -

Accept Your Pain; It Will Hurt Less