I doubt that is the norm across the entire nation, although bullying and cliques seem to be pervasive through both space and time.
It's the norm. Really. It is. Some schools are better than others, of course, and some neighborhoods have different cultures. Schools that are more homogeneous tend to be less volatile than the larger urban and suburban 'diverse' schools, but the more homogeneous schools (and it doesn't matter WHAT the main culture or group is) tend to be far less accepting of the 'outsider.'
Mainly, I believe, it's a matter of the size of the cliques; small schools have fewer of them; perhaps just the one that comprises the majority of the student body, and larger schools have more.
I've been around awhile. Been teaching awhile, in both very big schools and very small ones.
I like homeschool. A lot. As I have mentioned, it's not for everybody, but for those who are 'outliers?' Works great.
At the same time, the real world can be a bit like public schools. I'm not saying that kids should be bullied, but there is something to be said about learning how to overcome difficult social situations.
You know something?
I've been a realtor, a store manager, sold vacuum cleaners, been a waitress, disarmed land mines (really, I did....long story) and have had to deal with all sorts of stuff. Sexual harassment, Gender discrimination, even threats to my safety (ever try to show a house where you had to lock up the rottweiler first?) and the IRS.
NOTHING came close to the sort of experiences my high school students dealt with every day. I've never been threatened, as an adult, with a gang member pulling a knife on me because I was wearing the wrong color scarf. I've never been beaten up because I DIDN'T cheat on a test. I've never had any of those sorts of experiences, but my daughter did. As a direct result she left high school and finished her work as a home school pupil. That was my first experience with home school and the differences between the two experiences. My daughter and I remember those two years with a great deal of fondness, AND laughter...it was amazing.
Oh, and she didn't have any problems at all either getting into, or doing the work of, college.
Oh, and she doesn't have any problems at all dealing with adult social situations.