Dear Revoltingest

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest, Dear Revoltingest...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed Just Married

Dear reader,
Thank you for your poetic piece on petting.
Congratulations on tying the knot! Best wishes.
However, let me correct one line, which should read,
"That my girlfriend & I would ever get caught"
One should always use the correct personal pronoun, & always place the other person first in order.

 

[Trey of Diamonds]

Dear Revoltingest,

My friends; Bewildered, Unhappy, Noise-Maker, Just Married and John Prine would like to thank you profusely for your sage wisdom and advice.

Me, I don't take advice from engineers.

 

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest,
My friends; Bewildered, Unhappy, Noise-Maker, Just Married and John Prine would like to thank you profusely for your sage wisdom and advice.
Me, I don't take advice from engineers.

Dear reader,
Thank you all for the thank yous. I caution you that taking the advice of an engineer is
just like taking anyone's advice....you should consider it in light of your own judgement.
Regarding the advice of an engineer, I see so many who could benefit from our expertise
& experience. Just remember, if NASA managers had listened to the engineer who warned
about low temperature loss of sealing of elastomeric O-rings, one less space shuttle would've
exploded.

 

[Trey of Diamonds]

Dear reader,
Thank you all for the thank yous. I caution you that taking the advice of an engineer is
just like taking anyone's advice....you should consider it in light of your own judgement.
Regarding the advice of an engineer, I see so many who could benefit from our expertise
& experience. Just remember, if NASA managers had listened to the engineer who warned
about low temperature loss of sealing of elastomeric O-rings, one less space shuttle would've
exploded.

All true and points well made,
But I ask your attention be paid,
It is the Construction hand,
Whose words you must trust,
Let the engineer pound sand,
As his words turn to dust.

 

[Revoltingest]

All true and points well made,
But I ask your attention be paid,
It is the Construction hand,
Whose words you must trust,
Let the engineer pound sand,
As his words turn to dust.

Dear reader,
Thank you for that inscrutable poem.

If I could ever talk the mods into it, I'd resurrect
The Devil, who also posts in verse....& in Yodish.

 

[Wirey]

Dear reader,
Thank you for that inscrutable poem.

If I could ever talk the mods into it, I'd resurrect
The Devil, who also posts in verse....& in Yodish.

Miss the Devil I do.

 

[Revoltingest]

Miss the Devil I do.

Dear reader,
Thank you for your support.

 

[Trey of Diamonds]

Dear reader,
Thank you for that inscrutable poem.

If I could ever talk the mods into it, I'd resurrect
The Devil, who also posts in verse....& in Yodish.

You are very welcome and I will admit, you are my favorite engineer.

 

[Quagmire]

Dear Revoltingest,

Why haven't you answered my question yet?

And please don't tell me it's because I haven't asked one yet, because I don't see what that has to do with anything.

 

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest,
Why haven't you answered my question yet?
And please don't tell me it's because I haven't asked one yet, because I don't see what that has to do with anything.

Dear reader,
Thank you for your question. I haven't answered your stated question because you haven't asked yet.
I also must decline your request for not telling you the stated reason because the stated reason is the reason.
Now, I'll address your unstated question....the real one which I discern to be on your mind. Genital warts
are contracted by contact with an infected person. Treatment is available, but can be painful, involving
cutting, freezing or burning. About 25% will experience a recurrence within 3 months. Get well soon.

 

[Quagmire]

Dear reader,
Thank you for your question. I haven't answered your stated question because you haven't asked yet.
I also must decline your request for not telling you the stated reason because the stated reason is the reason.
Now, I'll address your unstated question....the real one which I discern to be on your mind. Genital warts
are contracted by contact with an infected person. Treatment is available, but can be painful, involving
cutting, freezing or burning. About 25% will experience a recurrence within 3 months. Get well soon.

Thank you.

Um, how much burning btw?

 

[Revoltingest]

Thank you.
Um, how much burning btw?

Dear reader,
Thank you for your follow up question.
The wart is burned off at the base, so the amount of burning is directly proportional to the number of warts.
You might enjoy the application of the topical anesthetic though, provided the nurse's Adam's apple is small.

 

[Wirey]

Dear Revoltingest,

How many ways are there to prepare a bacon sandwich?

 

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest,
How many ways are there to prepare a bacon sandwich?

Dear reader,
Thank you for your sandwichtarian question.
There are 4177 methods which I've found so far.
Of those, 4162 are stellar taste sensations.

 

[Reverend Rick]

There are 4177 methods which I've found so far.
Of those, 4162 are stellar taste sensations.

And the other 15?

 

[4consideration]

Dear Revoltingest,

I am very much into dream interpretation. Please help.

I am seeking your interpretation/advice regarding the dream that I am about to have tonight. I will check in the morning to see what your interpretation is. Thank you in advance for your insight.

Best Regards,

Dreaming of Answers

 

[Revoltingest]

And the other 15?

Dear reader,
Thank you for your arithmetically gifted inquiry.
The other 15 used pig genitals, & had a high "ick" factor.

 

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest,
I am very much into dream interpretation. Please help.
I am seeking your interpretation/advice regarding the dream that I am about to have tonight. I will check in the morning to see what your interpretation is. Thank you in advance for your insight.
Best Regards,
Dreaming of Answers

Dear reader,
Thank you for your concern about meaning from the Land of Nod.
I eagerly await knowing the details of your dream....unless it involves tear-away kilts.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Dear Revoltingest,

Why? Conversely, why not?

Sincerely,
Interested Reader

 

[Revoltingest]

Dear Revoltingest,
Why? Conversely, why not?
Sincerely,
Interested Reader

Dear reader,
Thank you for some of the broadest of all questions.
As every small child knows....because!