I want to believe in God again.

[Saint Frankenstein]

I don't understand arabic either. I said learn Islam, since you look for a new religion.

Well, I didn't say I was looking for a new religion. I probably should just stay with Catholicism. All the signs seem to point to it, for me. Even my name is extremely Catholic (I'm talking about my actual name, not my username, although part of it is inspired by Catholicism ). Lol.

I’m a little biased (and maybe shouldn’t be posting here at all) but why do you need a “church”? You either believe in God or not and you’re free to pray and meditate whenever you want. It can’t be the community you’re missing since that appears to be the negative aspect that drove you away. Why not just live the faith and religious practices that feel right to you and seek wider and further afield for the community and social acceptance?

As I pointed out above, it's probably just a matter of changing parishes. There are more liberal Catholic parishes. There's a wide diversity of approaches within Catholicism. Since my mom has passed away and I'm on my own now, there's not much tying me to that parish now, really. Time to go "parish shopping", it seems.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

SF, you and many others these days do this flip-flopping. I personally have never really understood it.

I'm guessing it might have to do with the fact that you were raised in your religion. I wasn't really raised much of anything. Nominally Christian, I guess, like the vast majority of Americans. I didn't go to church at all until I was around 9 or 10, and was that to an uncle's church and didn't last long. I converted to Catholicism as a teenager and it was my choice to. My family is not Catholic. My religion was always my choice.

Why commit to a religion unless you feel that it represents the actual reality? Until you feel certain of a truth, why feel the need to have a label at all? Isn't it enough to learn about different religions and be spiritual until such a time that you realise what the truth really is? And if that day doesn't come, is it really so awful?

Things aren't so simple in life, unfortunately.

 

[Rival]

I know you seem tied to Catholicism, SF, but have you ever tried a High Anglican Church? We've had some foreign Catholics in ours who didn't realise that it wasn't Catholic until they were told lol. It is far more liberal and accepting though, in my experience.

 

[The Emperor of Mankind]

I keep flip-flopping between religions and I'm tired of it. I should just learn my lesson - polytheism doesn't really click with me and it's a lonely experience for me. It doesn't bring me peace of mind and I don't really feel the gods, not in the same way I've experienced the Christian God in the past. That's just my experience.

But I am very angry and bitter at Christians, specifically Catholics, for how they have treated me and people like me. I do not feel like I was really accepted as a Catholic. I cannot stand the judgmentalism and hypocrisy. But if I commit to Christianity again, it would have to be Catholicism because I simply can't see myself being a Protestant. Orthodoxy is an option, but that's too culturally foreign to me. I miss going to Mass, I miss the feeling of peace, warmth and love I felt praying and meditating, I miss the sense of wonder. I also would not become some super-conservative type. That's just not me. I know how to reconcile being queer, trans and sex-positive with Christianity, within myself.

I don't know. A lot of the time I feel like my relationship with God and the Church is so broken that it can't be fixed and I'm just fooling myself.

I don't know where I'm going with this post, I'm just tired.

It's not necessary to be a polytheist in order to be Pagan. Indeed, you could research into Semitic or Phoenician Paganisms in order to go back to what the Christian god was earlier in history. But if Paganism isn't right for you then it's not right for you - it looks like you've come to terms with that anyway.

Do you have the option of an Orthodox congregation? What about home-churching?

 

[Aštra’el]

You don't have to belong to a major religion to worship YHWH.

 

[Unveiled Artist]

Oh, I know. I've done my research into the issue. It's just draining arguing about it over and over.

Unless you are homosexual, the Catechism and Bible doesn't speak about transgender.

My advice, other than that, as I love everything you mentioned about the Church to and wish I still had the belief and means to stay, but I'd do as you mentioned, find another parish. If you feel comfortable and if it's possible, I'd go to any parish and go to confession to talk about it a bit with a good priest. Reuniting yourself with the Eucharist by going to your parish outside of Mass may give answers, and looking up the thousands of saints to learn what they gone through to stay in their faith is a plus.

Religious discipline is in most religions; so, whichever you choose, there still will need to be patience, acceptance, and willingness to learn something new. I'd stay in Catholicism, if that's your nitch. It doesn't have to be Roman. That, or go to Episcopalian?

 

[Valjean]

SF, you sound like you're looking for a social club or psychotherapeutic modality, rather than objective truth.

 

[Katzpur]

I keep flip-flopping between religions and I'm tired of it. I should just learn my lesson - polytheism doesn't really click with me and it's a lonely experience for me. It doesn't bring me peace of mind and I don't really feel the gods, not in the same way I've experienced the Christian God in the past. That's just my experience.

But I am very angry and bitter at Christians, specifically Catholics, for how they have treated me and people like me. I do not feel like I was really accepted as a Catholic. I cannot stand the judgmentalism and hypocrisy. But if I commit to Christianity again, it would have to be Catholicism because I simply can't see myself being a Protestant. Orthodoxy is an option, but that's too culturally foreign to me. I miss going to Mass, I miss the feeling of peace, warmth and love I felt praying and meditating, I miss the sense of wonder. I also would not become some super-conservative type. That's just not me. I know how to reconcile being queer, trans and sex-positive with Christianity, within myself.

I don't know. A lot of the time I feel like my relationship with God and the Church is so broken that it can't be fixed and I'm just fooling myself.

I don't know where I'm going with this post, I'm just tired.

I miss your being a Christian, too, Frank, but you probably already know that. Have you even considered the Episcopal Church? I hear that, in many ways, it feels more Catholic than Protestant, and there certainly doesn't seem to be such animosity there towards "people like you." Wherever you end up, just remember what Mother Teresa once said: "For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It never was between you and them anyway."

 

[First Baseman]

I keep flip-flopping between religions and I'm tired of it. I should just learn my lesson - polytheism doesn't really click with me and it's a lonely experience for me. It doesn't bring me peace of mind and I don't really feel the gods, not in the same way I've experienced the Christian God in the past. That's just my experience.

But I am very angry and bitter at Christians, specifically Catholics, for how they have treated me and people like me. I do not feel like I was really accepted as a Catholic. I cannot stand the judgmentalism and hypocrisy. But if I commit to Christianity again, it would have to be Catholicism because I simply can't see myself being a Protestant. Orthodoxy is an option, but that's too culturally foreign to me. I miss going to Mass, I miss the feeling of peace, warmth and love I felt praying and meditating, I miss the sense of wonder. I also would not become some super-conservative type. That's just not me. I know how to reconcile being queer, trans and sex-positive with Christianity, within myself.

I don't know. A lot of the time I feel like my relationship with God and the Church is so broken that it can't be fixed and I'm just fooling myself.

I don't know where I'm going with this post, I'm just tired.

Stop worrying about the religion(s) and concentrate on your relationship with Jesus Christ. He will guide you where you ought to go. Just put your faith in Him and forget about what everybody else is telling you. Remember that the world rejected Him, too.

Don't think it a strange thing when your faith is put to the test.

 

[Demonslayer]

your relationship with Jesus Christ.

He keeps standing me up on dates. I ain't seen him around in forever.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

SF, you sound like you're looking for a social club or psychotherapeutic modality, rather than objective truth.

No idea how you got that from my posts.

 

[lovesong]

It's too early for structure, so I'm going with bullet points.
1.) Not gonna lie, there are some things the Catholics have that I really wish I had. I'd love the solemn hymes, religious items in every store, and those beautiful cathedrals you mentioned. Don't blame ya there.
2.) I share Madhuri's confusion about committing before you're sure. I never really understood how someone could adopt a label, try to join a community, and talk as if they were a credible follower of a religion they aren't 100% committed to. It always felt better to me to just say I wasn't sure, or give myself a broad label like "Pagan" so that I could belong somewhere but not loose credibility or sound confused when I kept working out what exactly I believed.
3.) It sounds like you, as an LGBT person, are considering supporting an organization that largely condemns the LGBT community. I think this is fine, there are always sections that will accept you and they support other values you have, but I just want to remind you that only two days ago you argued with great fury and passion that it is not acceptable. I'm just pointing this out to suggest maybe reconsidering where you commit yourself, or useing this experience to understand how others can find themselves at peace in similar situations.

 

[Twilight Hue]

While I would suggest walking with your own two feet and direction, it would probably benefit you to study a bit about Bishop Spong (John Shelby Spong) if not familier already. He might provide a source of inspiration as people do need hero's and examples from time to time. He seems ideal considering your spiritual and physical orientation.

 

[Valjean]

No idea how you got that from my posts.

In the original post you spoke of the loneliness of polytheism and the wish for peace of mind. You criticized the judgementalism and hypocrisy of the Catholics and spoke of the cultural foreignness of Orthodoxy. You say you miss the sense of wonder; the peace, warmth and love.

What do feelings have to do with objective truth? I don't expect the ToE to make me feel good, nor do I judge the merits of relativity by the behavior of physicists.
Is the truth of a religion to be judged by how it makes you feel?

If I want comfort and community I'd join a social club. If I wanted peace of mind I'd seek some psychotherapeutic technique.

This is why I got the impression you were seeking comfort rather than an objectively true religion.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

In the original post you spoke of the loneliness of polytheism and the wish for peace of mind. You criticized the judgementalism and hypocrisy of the Catholics and spoke of the cultural foreignness of Orthodoxy. You say you miss the sense of wonder; the peace, warmth and love.

What do feelings have to do with objective truth? I don't expect the ToE to make me feel good, nor do I judge the merits of relativity by the behavior of physicists.
Is the truth of a religion to be judged by how it makes you feel?

If I want comfort and community I'd join a social club. If I wanted peace of mind I'd seek some psychotherapeutic technique.

This is why I got the impression you were seeking comfort rather than an objectively true religion.

Religion isn't science, and there's nothing wrong with wanting to be comforted by your religious beliefs and wanting to be part of a community. That's a normal thing. And what is a religion that's "objectively true"? With religion, you have to go with your own experiences and your own reasoning.

 

[ThirtyThree]

I keep flip-flopping between religions and I'm tired of it. I should just learn my lesson - polytheism doesn't really click with me and it's a lonely experience for me. It doesn't bring me peace of mind and I don't really feel the gods, not in the same way I've experienced the Christian God in the past. That's just my experience.

But I am very angry and bitter at Christians, specifically Catholics, for how they have treated me and people like me. I do not feel like I was really accepted as a Catholic. I cannot stand the judgmentalism and hypocrisy. But if I commit to Christianity again, it would have to be Catholicism because I simply can't see myself being a Protestant. Orthodoxy is an option, but that's too culturally foreign to me. I miss going to Mass, I miss the feeling of peace, warmth and love I felt praying and meditating, I miss the sense of wonder. I also would not become some super-conservative type. That's just not me. I know how to reconcile being queer, trans and sex-positive with Christianity, within myself.

I don't know. A lot of the time I feel like my relationship with God and the Church is so broken that it can't be fixed and I'm just fooling myself.

I don't know where I'm going with this post, I'm just tired.

I believe the deity chooses the person, not the other way around. Then, some are never chosen too begin with. Such people exist in all walks of life and belief.

The question is, if any, which has selected you?

I suggest you look into your life and yourself for the answer.

 

[Riverwolf]

I keep flip-flopping between religions and I'm tired of it. I should just learn my lesson - polytheism doesn't really click with me and it's a lonely experience for me. It doesn't bring me peace of mind and I don't really feel the gods, not in the same way I've experienced the Christian God in the past. That's just my experience.

Do you think that might be partially from nostalgia? The couple of times I've changed religions, I'd invariably find an "equivalent" (or more than one) of a Goddess I basically made up and worshiped back in Middle School.

 

[NadiaMoon]

Have you ever heard of the religion called Filianism? They believe in God the Mother and Her daughter The Holy Queen of Heaven. If it interests you you can pm me and we can talk about it more? We don't believe in a heaven or hell, or sin. We believe that The Holy Queen will save ALL people, even to the smallest blade of grass.
Blessings

 

[Demonslayer]

I believe the deity chooses the person, not the other way around.

So then it just so happens in nearly every single case that the deity who the person's parents worship chooses that person's child?

Like why doesn't Yahweh choose more people from India?

 

[Akivah]

Since there's like 40,000 denominations of Christianity, you should be able to find one that's right for you.