Men and women and the Orgasm Gap

[Kilgore Trout]

I'd guess it was more common, but only based on anecdotal evidence.

I've found them to be extremely common, and in fact, "multiple orgasms" tend to be clusters of g-spot/vaginal orgams rather than clitoral orgasms. I find that women who masturbate frequently, or are comfortable with their own bodies/sex, have an easier time having both types of orgasms, but many women are less familiar with vaginal orgasms unless they have experienced them via a partner already.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I'd guess it was more common, but only based on anecdotal evidence.

I'm not denying that it can happen. I mean, there's women who orgasm just from only have their nipples stimulated. So people are obviously a bit different on an individual basis. It's just that I haven't seen any real evidence of the so-called "G-spot" other than anecdotal evidence. There's no actual evidence that there's certain places in the vagina that are so sensitive as to cause orgasm. The vagina is just not a very sensitive organ. The sensation in there is more based on pressure than on touch. So you can feel that something's in there, but that's it. It's like with a tampon, you feel vague pressure when it's in (because the muscles are holding it in place) but that's it.

Then, even if vaginal orgasms do happen, it's not sure whether it's actually occurring from vaginal tissue or clitoral tissue that's in the area. So this is a very unproven thing. So if it does happen, I put it in the same category as those women who have orgasms from nipple stimulation.

 

[Gjallarhorn]

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I've found them to be extremely common, and in fact, "multiple orgasms" tend to be clusters of g-spot/vaginal orgams rather than clitoral orgasms. I find that women who masturbate frequently, or are comfortable with their own bodies/sex, have an easier time having both types of orgasms, but many women are less familiar with vaginal orgasms unless they have experienced them via a partner already.

I don't think that's true at all. You can try and try all you want but you may never, or most likely never, have a vaginal orgasm.

I don't really understand what all the hype is, anyway. The clitoris is the only organ solely devoted to sexual pleasure and is the most sensitive organ there is, in terms of nerve endings. The vagina is quite a "dead" hole compared to the clitoris when it comes to nerve endings. It's harmful to shame women because they cannot have a vaginal orgasm, or set it up as a goal as if it's better than clitoral orgasms. This seems to be a hold-over of Freud's sexist nonsense saying that females who only have clitoral orgasm are "immature".

Yes, vaginal penetration feels good as long as the clitoris is stimulated at the same time. Otherwise it's just pressure and it's not all that exciting by itself. The clitoris is the star of the show in female sexuality and vaginal penetration is just a nice bonus, in terms of sensation. For males to get an idea of what that's like, imagine having sex but not using your penis at all, no touching it. Would you be able to have an orgasm that way?

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

This really needs to be posted: The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm by Anne Koedt

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I don't think that's true at all. You can try and try all you want but you may never, or most likely never, have a vaginal orgasm.

Indeed, I can try forever and never have one, since I don't have a vagina. However, having been with a number of women throughout my life, I can tell you that nearly all of them have been able to have vaginal orgasms once the right type and amount of stimulation is applied to the correct area.

I don't really understand what all the hype is, anyway. The clitoris is the only organ solely devoted to sexual pleasure and is the most sensitive organ there is, in terms of nerve endings. The vagina is quite a "dead" hole compared to the clitoris when it comes to nerve endings. It's harmful to shame women because they cannot have a vaginal orgasm, or set it up as a goal as if it's better than clitoral orgasms. This seems to be a hold-over of Freud's sexist nonsense saying that females who only have clitoral orgasm are "immature".

I don't understand the hype either. Nor the controversy. Many women have vaginal/g-spot orgasms. And many are able to achieve multiple/cluster orgasms this way.

Yes, vaginal penetration feels good as long as the clitoris is stimulated at the same time. Otherwise it's just pressure and it's not all that exciting by itself. The clitoris is the star of the show in female sexuality and vaginal penetration is just a nice bonus, in terms of sensation. For males to get an idea of what that's like, imagine having sex but not using your penis at all, no touching it. Would you be able to have an orgasm that way?

That's certainly an interesting theory. However, it doesn't at all correlate with the experience and physiology of most of the women I've been with and discussed sex with.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Indeed, I can try forever and never have one, since I don't have a vagina. However, having been with a number of women throughout my life, I can tell you that nearly all of them have been able to have vaginal orgasms once the right type and amount of stimulation is applied to the correct area.



I don't understand the hype either. Nor the controversy. Many women have vaginal/g-spot orgasms. And many are able to achieve multiple/cluster orgasms this way.



That's certainly an interesting theory. However, it doesn't at all correlate with the experience and physiology of most of the women I've been with and discussed sex with.

Yes, I've heard those anecdotes. I'm not saying that it never happens but I put it in the same category as women who can orgasm from nipple stimulation or from sitting in a car when the engine's revving.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Yes, I've heard those anecdotes. I'm not saying that it never happens but I put it in the same category as women who can orgasm from nipple stimulation or from sitting in a car when the engine's revving.

Then let's not rely on anecdotes. The Hite report from the 1970's, found that 30% of women regularly reach orgasm through intercourse alone. Hardly a rare phenomenon.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Then let's not rely on anecdotes. The Hite report from the 1970's, found that 30% of women regularly reach orgasm through intercourse alone. Hardly a rare phenomenon.

Wasn't that based on anecdotal studies, too?

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Wasn't that based on anecdotal studies, too?

No, it was a behavioral survey of 100,000 women and girls age 14-78 regarding all aspects of sexuality. If you want to call such a study "anecdotal," that is certainly your prerogative. However, I'll take the actual, combined, personally reported data of 100,000 women over your bizzare, personal resistance to the idea that women have vaginal orgasms, which is apparently based on nothing but strange ideas about female physiology.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

No, it was a behavioral survey of 100,000 women and girls age 14-78 regarding all aspects of sexuality. If you want to call such a study "anecdotal," that is certainly your prerogative. However, I'll take the actual, combined, personally reported data of 100,000 women over your bizzare, personal resistance to the idea that women have vaginal orgasms, which is apparently based on nothing but strange ideas about female physiology.

"Strange ideas about female physiology"? Um, I have a vagina, actually. I know how it works and how it feels. Speaking for myself, I know that the clitoris has always been my center of sexual pleasure. Vaginal penetration is nice and can add to the pleasure, but it's very much secondary. Actually, it can feel pretty boring at times. I have to be in a certain mood for it. The sensation that you actually feel from the vagina is pressure, not fine touch. There's just not that many nerve endings in the vagina. I also am aware of society's ignorance of female sexuality and how some straight men feel that all they need to do to get a woman off is vaginal penetration. Porn pushes that idea and Freudian psychoanalysis also shamed women for not having vaginal orgasms by promoting them as more "mature" than clitoral orgasms.

I'm also aware of anatomical studies of the female genitalia and that such concepts as the "G-spot" are not proven to exist and are highly debatable. Plus, even if it does exist, there's debate over whether it's actually vaginal tissue or an interior part of the clitoris that's being stimulated.

So I have good reason not to be convinced on this subject.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

So I have good reason not to be convinced on this subject.

Sure, based on the anecdotes of one.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Sure, based on the anecdotes of one.

And also reading research about it. That study that you yourself mentioned also said that 70% of women reported not having vaginal orgasms, anyway.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

And also reading research about it.

Yes, I'm familiar with the research methods of random people on the internet who filter and interpret only the data which supports their pre-drawn conclusions.

You'll have to excuse me if I don't take the word of my wife and many other women I've been with who are able to achieve vaginal orgasms, by themselves or with help, and who have articulated consistent descriptions of the varying quality and nature of vaginal vs. clitoral orgasms, over the word of a random internet person who apparently has a strange bone to pick with other women having vaginal orgasms.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Yes, I'm familiar with the research methods of random people on the internet who filter and interpret only the data which supports their pre-drawn conclusions.

You'll have to excuse me if I don't take the word of my wife and many other women I've been with who are able to achieve vaginal orgasms, by themselves or with help, and who have articulated consistent descriptions of the varying quality and nature of vaginal vs. clitoral orgasms, over the word of a random internet person who apparently has a strange bone to pick with other women having vaginal orgasms.

So you insult me for stating my own personal experience meanwhile you're largely relying on the anecdotal reports of women in your own personal life? Hypocrite much?

I don't only consider my own experiences. It wouldn't much sense to do so since, as a transsexual man, my experience with my genitalia may not be the same as a cis woman's experience with her genitalia due to my dysphoria about that area of my body. However, I do consider research and anatomical studies. Anecdotal reports aren't enough, either way.

Yes, these things are certainly debatable and the claim that the vagina by itself is sensitive enough to produce orgasm without clitoral stimulation is not proven: G-spot - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

So the jury is still out on this question.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

So the jury is still out on this question.

I suppose for some people it is. For others, it's not.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

I suppose for some people it is. For others, it's not.

Seems that this discussion is over.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Seems that this discussion is over.

Yep, it appears we both said our piece.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Yep, it appears we both said our piece.

Pretty much. I guess we'll just agree to disagree.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

Pretty much. I guess we'll just agree to disagree.

i don't see it as a matter of disagreement at all. Unless, of course, I agree that you're disagreeing with reality.