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My five year-old son is gay

Skwim

Veteran Member
1. My son is 5 and goes to a church preschool.
2. He has loved Scooby Doo since developing the ability and attention span to sit still long enough to watch it.
3. Halloween is a holiday and its main focus is wearing a costume.
4. My son’s school had the kids dress up, do a little parade, and then change out of costumes for the rest of the party.
5. Boo’s best friend is a little girl
6. Boo has an older sister
7. Boo spends most of his time with me.
8. I am a woman.
9. I am Boo’s mother, not you.
Tack så mycket
 

dust1n

Zindīq
She's making this out to be everyone else's problem. I don't condone intolerance but, seriously, what did she expect? Halloween or not, she sent him to a Christian school dressed like a girl. To expect NO comments or intrigue is unrealistic.

I commend her for being accepting but she chose to exploit her son. That's her problem.

Other than that, I agree with you.

I would also expect such blatant intolerance from a Christian school.
 

Circle_One

Well-Known Member
Ok, and if we would have heard the story from a child saying "All I wanted was to dress up as Daphne for Halloween, but my mommy wouldn't let me. I had to dress up as [insert boy costume here] instead, because that's what she wanted" all of you condemning the mom now for "exploiting her son", would be condemning her for not supporting him and allowing him to be what he wanted.

Can't a nice story just be a nice story anymore? Jesus. :facepalm:
 

Storm

ThrUU the Looking Glass
Um.. how was her child exploited and what agenda are you referring to?
Well, she seems to be using his story (at least) to push an agenda of tolerance. I've certainly heard of worse agendas, but I'm not really comfortable with a parent using their kid for political football.

I don't care if the kid is gay, but A) it seems a little early to be slapping him with the label, and B) it's not how I would handle the situation, personally.
 

Walkntune

Well-Known Member
Perhaps I should not have used the word "exploit".
No I think you were right but I didn't mean exploit in the school but by posting a pic of the internet to express this point.

But here’s the point, it is none of your damn business.

What was the point of making it everyone's business on the Internet if this is her point?:rolleyes:
 
I think she should have listened to her sons concerns, it's a bit worrying that the kid has a better concept of consequence than his mother. If it was me I would have told the kid flat out you can go as Daphne if you want but the other kids might tease you for it.
 

blackout

Violet.
Her son looks adorable.
And happy.

Sadly our societal stupidities
make it very hard for a whole lot of people
to be themSelves.

Does that mother know what her church teaches?

I mean, if it had been a UU church,
it would have been no problem.
The child would have been loved
by everyone and experienced a whole lot of positive Self affirmation.

Still I wonder if a slightly older student came into that christian school
wearing an upsidown pentagram,
or dressed as the "Devil" (satan) with classic horns and tail
if the same parents would have pursed their lips in disapproval.

You do unfortunately have to weigh situations for your children.
Perhaps the issue is less the costume,
and more where she attends church/school with her son.
Not sure public school would be much better though, really. :(

At least she's not living in niavety land now.
 
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LuisDantas

Aura of atheification
Premium Member
Storm has a very good point. Promoting tolerance towards homosexuality, transvestism and/or transexuality is definitely a worthy goal, and one that deserves a few courageous decisions and hardships along the way. Assuming that the school has problems with that, then it is indeed not much of a real school, as Dust1n implied.

On the other hand, regardless of the excellent merits of the cause itself, I also agree with Storm that it is a bit disturbing to see such a young child exposed to the lack of understanding of the world at large. Maybe we are talking about a very well-resolved and (most importantly) well-supported child, and in that case my fears are probably groundless. But we simply can't tell whether that is the case out of a photo and a news article. Children are often pushed towards participation in agendas they can't really understand or sustain. Hopefully this is not the case here, but homophoby being still so widespread as it is, I am fearful for the child for the time being. I have known child transexuals and let me say, we are bound to someday look back to these days and regret our odious intolerance.
 

blackout

Violet.
It just dawned on me to explore this idea,
that while the mother isn't participating
in social conditioning
(of what boy's do and don't wear, in our society)
and should in my mind be commended as such,
the boy is going to face the social conditioning of others,
as does anyone who "dares to be different".

It really is a skill, to pull this off with flair and confidence,
and you really have to care MORE about who YOU are
than about what others think and say.
That puts the ball in the boy's court,
not the mother's.

Mothering is a very hard job.
 

LuisDantas

Aura of atheification
Premium Member
At least she's not living in niavety land now.

This caught my eye. I assume you mean naivety land.

So, Violet, is it your opinion that children should generally be made aware at an early age that some people are tolerant and others aren't? So that they won't suffer greatly when they grow up unprepared for the actual world out there?

Is that what you mean? Because I find the thought very intriguing and appealing. People are often way too afraid of the real world these days, and all too tragically that results in grown-ups that never learned to be grown-ups in the real world.
 
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