There's a part in 60:10 [...] And if you know them to be believers, then do not return them to the disbelievers; they are not lawful [wives] for them, nor are they lawful [husbands] for them [...]
I think there might be a few more but they're talking about polytheists and one is for men, saying that they can marry people of the book. Doesn't sound like it applies to women.
My husband believes in God but dislikes religion, I don't know what that is in Islam... A disbeliever?
You need to take baby steps..My advice is focus inside..not outside (your husband).. Nobody can become a perfect Muslim in one day..Islam is more about intentions..I believe if your intentions are good..God knows that and he will judge you for your individual test/hardships..not every finger on the hand is equal..
If I were you these would be my baby steps.
1. Bear Witness that their is no God but Allah and Muhammad is his messenger.(This being the most important, something so ingrained in me that I would not give it up for my Mother..and I love my Mom) Thus forming the foundations of my faith..This has to be the strongest IMO.
2. Remain in a clean state as much as possible..the Islamic Ghusl and Wudhu..Cleanliness is half the faith.
3. Control my ego..even when someone deserves a mouthful of insults..for the sake of Allah.
4. Make silent dhikr...consciously remember/invoke God and ask for his help/mercy. Have an awareness of his attributes.
5. Give charity in the name of Allah..this one actually feels really good for some reason.. Try giving up things which have real value..not just the trash that I was gonna chuck out anyways.
6.Pray as much as possible...start off with two prayers a day and work my way up.. I have seen the best of Muslims struggle to make 5 prayers..This also leaves me with a sense of relaxation.
7. Read the Quran in whatever language and try and understand Gods words. Dont get caught up in things that dont make sense..get proper help from a scholar..IMO not everyone has the means or knowledge to interpret the Quran..completely at least.
8. Try fasting a few time a week..in Ramadan..if i feel like i wont be able to..its better not to start..rather than break it mid way.. I have also heard the fasts have crazy hours in england..so I dont really blame you..Id struggle with 17 hours myself..but Ive learnt a trick or two:yes:..if I get too hungry Ill take a nap...worst thing you can do is think about food..keep yourself cool at all times..you are allowed to rinse your mouth with water..without swallowing it.
9. Think about the secondary issues after Ive become comfortable with the above..You were married before you accepted Islam..the rules are different for you...IMO if you had a strong faith in no.1 inshallah God will forgive number 9 and whatever is troubling you.
You remind me of a new born bird jumping out of the tree without actually even learning to flap your wings..you will hit the ground everytime..and I notice it happening over and over..I dont mean to intrude on your search..but sometimes people need an extra push..or tough love.