Oh, dear...

[Ouroboros]

My thoughts are with you Ymir and your mom. Words fail.

 

[Thief]

Well, I had hoped this news would come in the distant future, but I was informed about an hour ago that my mom may not make it to Mother's day. She is 84, and was diagnosed with an inoperable cancerous tumor the size of a grape, situated in a duct running between her liver and pancreas. The cancer is not directly killing her, but it has caused severe damage to her liver and kidneys. So sad.

On a brighter note, I'm so glad that I've been able to spend the last few years as her primary care giver. It's been a huge challenge, but I was able to make a friend out of a parent. I'm executor of her will and everything gets split between myself and my sister, so we will be relatively OK here in Paradise. It's just too bad that the great speckled bird probably won't be back to enjoy her little corner of wonderland.

I have to start making some calls now..... *sigh* (One of billions...)

may her passing be peaceful.....

 

[Quagmire]

Take care, Paul.

 

[David1967]

Very sorry to hear that. Condolences to you and your family.

 

[Papoon]

My thoughts are with you my friend. A few days ago I had to assist my beloved 19yo cat, my dearest friend, in passing. Grief can make us more tender and loving. I know you are wise enough to transform grief into compassion. You will carry the best of her in your heart.

 

[Shak34]

I am so sorry to hear that. My condolences.

 

[SkepticThinker]

I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope it's a peaceful passing. I feel your pain and offer my condolences.

 

[Deeje]

It's never easy to say goodbye to the one who brought you into the world. I am staring down the barrel myself....my Mum is 92 and her health is failing.
Grief has to have its own expression and its own time.....it can't be predicted or hurried.

Memories will keep them close.

 

[lewisnotmiller]

Thoughts are with you and your sister, @YmirGF.

 

[Laika]

I hope you get to make the most of the time you have left with her @YmirGF and that whenever the end comes, it is peaceful. I'm glad that you have some really good memories of your time with your mum and can only wish you all the best.

 

[Sunstone]

My condolences, Paul.

 

[Brian Schuh]

We are commanded to take care of our parents in old age. Never forget the Lord blessed you by giving you the means to keep that duty. You are blessed. We had to put my MeMa in a public nursing home.

And it isn't easy no matter how old a parent or grandparent is. My MeMa was 94 when she died.

Never forget you are blessed.

 

[Godobeyer]

Well, I had hoped this news would come in the distant future, but I was informed about an hour ago that my mom may not make it to Mother's day. She is 84, and was diagnosed with an inoperable cancerous tumor the size of a grape, situated in a duct running between her liver and pancreas. The cancer is not directly killing her, but it has caused severe damage to her liver and kidneys. So sad.

On a brighter note, I'm so glad that I've been able to spend the last few years as her primary care giver. It's been a huge challenge, but I was able to make a friend out of a parent. I'm executor of her will and everything gets split between myself and my sister, so we will be relatively OK here in Paradise. It's just too bad that the great speckled bird probably won't be back to enjoy her little corner of wonderland.

I have to start making some calls now..... *sigh* (One of billions...)

Sorry for your lost !

 

[YmirGF]

We are commanded to take care of our parents in old age. Never forget the Lord blessed you by giving you the means to keep that duty. You are blessed. We had to put my MeMa in a public nursing home.

And it isn't easy no matter how old a parent or grandparent is. My MeMa was 94 when she died.

Never forget you are blessed.

Thanks for the thought, Brian. I do have some comments however. For me, I never needed any supposed god to command me to do what had to be done. The idea strikes me as somewhat absurd in many respects. I already had the means, through my own efforts, so a god figure never entered into the picture of my thinking. As for being blessed? Well, I try not to let such ideas go to my head. I'm quite willing to say I am certainly an anomaly, that should not exist, yet here I sit, but still "being blessed" strikes me as a tad arrogant and significantly above my pay-grade. I am happy to offer whatever blessings are mine to give.

 

[Brian Schuh]

Thanks for the thought, Brian. I do have some comments however. For me, I never needed any supposed god to command me to do what had to be done. The idea strikes me as somewhat absurd in many respects. I already had the means, through my own efforts, so a god figure never entered into the picture of my thinking. As for being blessed? Well, I try not to let such ideas go to my head. I'm quite willing to say I am certainly an anomaly, that should not exist, yet here I sit, but still "being blessed" strikes me as a tad arrogant and significantly above my pay-grade. I am happy to offer whatever blessings are mine to give.

Don't let a disagreement over theology take away from the kind thought I was expressing. Sometimes I get mad when someone says they will pray for me, but now I just take it as a kind gesture. They are well meaning even if they don't serve the same God I do.

It is a shame when a religious person can't even bless you in the name of his God. I'm sorry I wasted my time with you.

 

[YmirGF]

Update: Mom further weakened in the last 24 hours and the doctor I spoke to early yesterday morning urge me to come in yesterday and see her "while she is still lucid, as in a very short time she may not even recognize you". That certainly got my attention and me and sis made the trek over to the mainland and surprised her with a visit. I'm glad we went while she still had her faculties, though she was a bit hazy due to the Dilaudid.

It's strange having a conversation with someone and being quite aware that it may be your last. One idea I have used for decades now is to treat each moment and encounter as if it is my last on Earth. That idea has made me so attentive to the truly meaningful aspects of life and I'm glad I learned that lesson so early. I'm also grateful for a dear lady imploring me to "get in touch with my feelings" when I was in my late teens. I did and her lesson has served me well.

 

[YmirGF]

Don't let a disagreement over theology take away from the kind thought I was expressing. Sometimes I get mad when someone says they will pray for me, but now I just take it as a kind gesture. They are well meaning even if they don't serve the same God I do.

It is a shame when a religious person can't even bless you in the name of his God. I'm sorry I wasted my time with you.

Oddly, I didn't mean that to be as harsh as you seem to have taken it. It would appear that sensitivity is not one of your strongest attributes. Sorry to waste your precious time.

 

[LuisDantas]

My sentiments.

 

[Brian Schuh]

Oddly, I didn't mean that to be as harsh as you seem to have taken it. It would appear that sensitivity is not one of your strongest attributes. Sorry to waste your precious time.

I was just saying I wish I could have taken care of my MeMa to the very end. My wish for you is that you have heard or will hear your parent's last words.

The theological thought I expressed is that it is a blessing and a gift to do the good deeds we believe we are to do.

 

[YmirGF]

I was just saying I wish I could have taken care of my MeMa to the very end. My wish for you is that you have heard or will hear your parent's last words.

The theological thought I expressed is that it is a blessing and a gift to do the good deeds we believe we are to do.

Ah, I see, Brian. Things get complicated unnecessarily over the Internet. I'm fortunate enough to have taken care of her to the "very end". I literally did everything I could and I am good with my efforts. On her bed yesterday she said, "Over the last few months you have behaved brilliantly. Thank you for being there." It doesn't get much better than that, coming from a person looking death in the eye. I later said something like, "I've nothing left to say that I have not already said. You know how I feel. I know how you feel. Don't be afraid. You're safe and so just lay back and smile."

I'm sorry that you didn't get a chance to savor this kind of feeling. I'm sure you did a fine job nevertheless.