Sex or Love

[illykitty]

My opinion is similar to Penumbra. I don't care for sex without love. I don't enjoy that.

I wouldn't really say I'm quite repulsed by it, more like uninterested. I need something more than physical attraction, there's personality and intellect too. I don't get attracted to much people, tbh. I don't think much people would be attracted to me either so it's fine with me.

Everything works out!

 

[chinu]

My opinion is similar to Penumbra. I don't care for sex without love. I don't enjoy that.

I wouldn't really say I'm quite repulsed by it, more like uninterested. I need something more than physical attraction, there's personality and intellect too. I don't get attracted to much people, tbh. I don't think much people would be attracted to me either so it's fine with me.

Everything works out!

BTW, what attractions do you need, that are more than physical attractions ?

 

[illykitty]

BTW, what attractions do you need, that are more than physical attractions ?

Personality and intellect... Like a sense of humour, kindness, have similar interests, like to have deeper conversations, loyalty, etc.

 

[chinu]

Personality and intellect... Like a sense of humour, kindness, have similar interests, like to have deeper conversations, loyalty, etc.

Well.. you seems to be a beautiful girl, illy.
have you ever posted your photograph on the forum ?

 

[illykitty]

Well.. you seems to be a beautiful girl, illy.
have you ever posted your photograph on the forum ?

Thanks and yes I have a few times, although I do have some in my profile now.

I'm not sure what was the purpose of this reply though, except to make me shy.

 

[chinu]

Thanks and yes I have a few times, although I do have some in my profile now.

I'm not sure what was the purpose of this reply though, except to make me shy.

Why to be shy ?
Now I have seen your profile picture, you are really very beautiful,illy.

 

[illykitty]

Why to be shy ?
Now I have seen your profile picture, you are really very beautiful,illy.

I get easily embarrassed by compliments, that's why. And if you ask why I get easily embarrassed, I'm not sure. Maybe it's because I have a negative self-image.

 

[Nymphs]

Do you Sex because you Love someone, or do you Love because you Sex someone ?

I can have sex whether or not a I love someone, as I am able to separate the two for the pleasure if I like.

BUT, I do prefer sex with someone that I love or care for.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

I've been madly, deeply, and truly in love with anyone I've had sex with - at least in the moment.

 

[Drolefille]

Well.. you seems to be a beautiful girl, illy.
have you ever posted your photograph on the forum ?

That came off as REALLY creepy to me.

Personality and intellect... Like a sense of humour, kindness, have similar interests, like to have deeper conversations, loyalty, etc.

Word, I'm a sapiosexual! I find brains so, so sexy.

 

[chinu]

That came off as REALLY creepy to me.

Oh!
You mean,
I should never try to say this, to you ?

 

[DreadFish]

For me, sex can be without being in love, but it has to at least be with a friend. I have never had casual sex with a woman I just met. Though im not really interested in the idea, im not entirely closed off to it either, should a situation arise in which it feels right. Mainly, I have to know the girl enough to feel comfortable opening up to her in that way.

Generally, I find emotional intimacy to be part of the fun. I was once casually involved with a girl for a short while. She didn't like to kiss during sex and I had a really hard time staying turned on, even though she was a very attractive girl and I really liked her, it was just too impersonal for me to enjoy.

Im a big fan of **** buddies, personally. There's nothing like a good, attractive friend who you also have sex with. There can be enjoyment of emotional and physical intimacy together without a commitment and other complications that can be a part of a relationship. Anyway, without emotional intimacy, there's not a whole lot of enjoyment for me

 

[Drolefille]

Oh!
You mean,
I should never try to say this, to you ?

No, I'd really like it if you'd never say you think I "sound" attractive - and then ask for pictures.

 

[chinu]

No, I'd really like it if you'd never say you think I "sound" attractive - and then ask for pictures.

How can any other person decide what sounds attractive to me ? and is creepy.
Perhaps.. Instead of what you are thinking about, Some other virtues like.. Spiritual interests of the person attracts me. And i think I can judge this by seeing a picture.

 

[Drolefille]

How can any other person decide what sounds attractive to me ? and is creepy.
Perhaps.. Instead of what you are thinking about, Some other virtues like.. Spiritual interests of the person attracts me. And i think I can judge this by seeing a picture.

Observers can determine if something sounds creepy to them. The rest of it, I really don't care about.

 

[kashmir]

Sex is what animals do, humans make love at least in my situation.
I have never been able to just have sex with a woman, growing up, people used to poke fun at me for turning down one night stands.
I cant help it, mr happy doesn't work that way, its not like there is an on/off button.
99% of all my friends have one, me, someone forgot to give me one I guess.
It only recognizes the word love.
The word sex does nothing for it at all.

 

[Thana]

"Make Love"
I shudder at the thought.

Get in and get out, I don't have all night. And stop trying to stare into my eyes, It's creepy and distracting. Talking is out, Jeez I'm not here for a conversation.

Hehe if you can't tell, I have intimacy issues :drool:

Plus, I don't understand why people associate love with sex. They're seperate, And I never got how sex is supposed to express your love.
I guess I'm still too young and inexperienced

 

[Amechania]

"Make Love"
I shudder at the thought.

Get in and get out, I don't have all night. And stop trying to stare into my eyes, It's creepy and distracting. Talking is out, Jeez I'm not here for a conversation.

Hehe if you can't tell, I have intimacy issues :drool:

Plus, I don't understand why people associate love with sex. They're seperate, And I never got how sex is supposed to express your love.
I guess I'm still too young and inexperienced

Actually you sound jaded.
I loved my ex but I began to hate having sex with him because he went from being a caring, gentle lover to someone who only wanted to do things that degraded me. I don't know why that happened but it was abusive and I stopped loving him. We split and I avoided intimacy for a long time.

It was another woman who reawakened my passion. She didn't return my love because she saw in tendency to fall in love too easily because of my attatchment to physical affection. We split and it hurt. As a result I decided that I could have sex without emotional intimacy. After pursuing this lifestyle for awhile I developed severe depression and ended up in therapy. I've come to realize that to be happy I should let love come first and let sex be an expression of that love, not the other way around.

 

[zenzero]

Friend chinu,

Energy is one, which is either thrown of the system through sexual acts, love followed by sex makes the enrgy better utilised since it involves certain merging of spirits and not just bodies. Sex during tantic practise is understood to be such that the enrgies are not thrown out but the near orgasm is maintained by partners as long as possible which is a state of bliss.
Yogis prefer to transmute sexual energy to spiritual energy or ojas which moves from the base chakra [muladhara] to the sahasra chakra.

Well the mind hardly moved during this life to do anything other than converting it [sexual energy] to ojas [spiritual energy] and so remain a bachelor in more ways than one.

Love & rgds

 

[zenzero]

Friend Amechania,

I've come to realize that to be happy I should let love come first and let sex be an expression of that love, not the other way around.

That is what REALISATIONS mean and slowly one grows through learning throughout life.
Best Wishes to you!

Love & rgds