Terrified of becoming an atheist again

[paarsurrey]

Since life is temporary doesn't that give it more meaning?

If you use your life to help others, then your actions will last far after your gone.

If temporary gives meaning then permanence should be most meaningful and non-existence with least meaning. Right? Please
Regards

 

[paarsurrey]

Please explain your full definitions for 'atheist'.

It will be good if you yourself give your understanding of Atheist or Atheism,your own understanding not from a lexicon/dictionary. Please
Regards

 

[viole]

As an atheist, I would kill myself. I have tried to be an atheist and it lead to me having nothing to live for but drugs and pleasure. It eventually lead to me stabbing a man and I found God in jail. If I knew there was no God, I would end this life and do society a favor.

I'm terrified of who I am without the creator. I am terrified to think of what will become of me if I become an atheist again.

I'm convinced that the voice inside me telling me to be good to others, think positively, renounce and reject the toxic thoughts, forgive others, be meek, humble, charitable, peaceful, and simple is God and spirit-guides directing me.

I'm too scared I'd hurt other people if I didn't believe in God and spirits.

Even as an atheist, wouldn't you agree that for certain people, having belief in God can be healthy? It can motivate them to do good works, be kind to others, forgive, avoid hurting others, and also give them the joy and peace to not hurt themselves

If I don't believe there are spirits guiding me, I'm a dangerous person.

I believe that all there is is the material world and that it essentially doesn't matter if I'm humble, peaceful, forgiving, and kind to people. Either way, I'm just going to die and not be held accountable for my actions and life becomes a selfish three ring circus **** show where I just live for the moment and pleasure and don't care about morals.

The question is: do you currently consider yourself good? Or are the spirits guiding you the good guys instead?

Ciao

- viole

 

[wicketkeeper]

I am now an old man - not that I feel old, well not all the time ! I am outside religion, and have even been an atheist for a while. I am trying to shed the unnecessary layers of my egoic self, and have done ok, I still have dark nights of the soul which can last several weeks !

I think we waste a majority of our live in belief systems of any kind, not limited to religion ! I have friends who have made supporting football teams into a religion. So wherever we roam we may fall into the traps of dogma and ritual - not confined to those who invest their lives in orthodox religions. Atheists have made a religion about their particular beliefs, so none of us escape from the damage of holding onto a belief system. I would advise keeping an open mind about everything, and to question it all.

On my good days I am blissed out, on my bad days I am sailing through the oceans of self doubt. I wish you happier times..

 

[Spiderman]

Technically, you are still you, regardless of (W)ho takes the credit for that.

I consider the bad I do to be my will. I consider the good I do to be God's will and that I did it with the help of my higher power and spirit-guides

I mean this as a respectful question: are there voices telling you to ignore the other ones?

Not really, but there is a flood of temptations and dark thoughts that I must reject. I'm bombarded with them. I just know what I was as an unbeliever and I shudder and am horrified by it and filled with regret. I just want to lock myself away from the world and be an anchorite (pray all the time), but that isn't healthy either (unless it's my calling lol)

Let me tell you a tale I have told maybe one or two other people outside of my brother and mother:

I believe a spirit of some sort, who definitely was more elite than even archangels (maybe Powers?), took care of me as a child. As a child, "Susan" was a dear friend of mine who cheered me up and encouraged me despite an abusive childhood and LOTS of dreams where shadow demons were trying to kill me. One night, when I was 8, I vacuumed up the leader of one of the shadow demons. He stayed in this instinctive psychic prison for a decade. "Susan" got really ticked off, because she realized that, like the demons, anyone who stays in my head can't get out again. I'm a spiritual sarlaac pit, LOL. Even Satan won't spend too much time threatening me directly. The teen years meant I had to experience hormones AND a very ticked off Force of Nature who couldn't leave. My mind was splitting and shattering ... but so was she. We finally realized we were bonded. There was nothing we could do. In my early 30's I managed to expel her, but I was super depressed over the feeling that my soul was chopped in half and it didn't take. She was snapped back inside in just a couple of weeks. This year, after having watched the tv version of the Exorcist, we had an idea, and now she's been "traded" and is now free. Demons have tried attacking thinking I'm a weakling without her, but I don't exactly lack talent myself and they learned the hard way not to mess with me She even threatened my loved ones in heaven so that I'd have to learn that I have power without her. I was able to absorb all the damage she was doing and gain that power for myself.

I'm sure many religions would have plenty to say about this story. However, only YOU have this spiritual relationship with the spirits in question, so screw everyone else. If you still need those spirits to show you the way, then still accept their help. However, it IS possible to learn how to use your own gifts. <3

Thank you very much for sharing that with me. You seem to be a mighty warrior in the spirit realm. Yes, I still need help from the spirit realm and sometimes the ways they speak are silly and impossible to explain, but they are vital in my life for motivating me to be good and stay sober, humble, meek, charitable, faithful, and hopeful.

Maybe someone more shamanistic might be able to help you?

Yes, they would be far more helpful than the born again Christians I meet. Unfortunately I don't know any shamans in real life.

Even though I'm a nurse with a degree in psychology, I also value holistic concepts and concede that "cultural" traditions can work better, even if it's just because those traditions offer a comfortable language for that patient.

awesome!

Have you watched Legion?

never seen it

I find that using even blatant fiction can help provide a framework for your soul.

agreed

You're a good person with some impulse issues. Everyone has issues. Saints had a lot of them IIRC.

True. Thank you for your post. You are a good person with a lot of potential I can tell. Wish I knew you in real life. God (or a spirit) has spoken through you. Be proud and grateful for who you are

 

[Spiderman]

The question is: do you currently consider yourself good? Or are the spirits guiding you the good guys instead?

Ciao

- viole

I consider my will to be bad. I believe I have undergone and continue to undergo transformation.

This is the work of God and spirit-guides. So, they are the good guys/girls. Anything good that I do and the bad that I avoid doing, is their credit. They do for me what I can't do for myself. I have managed to stay out of jail for over a year with only a few relapses on cough syrup. The relapses were my will. However, I've done some good things for people and avoided most of my past vices and turned down people offering drugs and alcohol. I give my higher power all the credit for my good behavior.

Things come to me in prayer that transform how I think. I wish I could explain it. A lot of people experience it. There were a lot of people who were angry, violent, belligerent, proud, arrogant people who found God and became meek, humble, peaceful, simple, and charitable. I have experienced that transformation to some extent.

 

[Spiderman]

Are you familiar with all the writings on spiritual dryness? Many have gone through dry periods where they doubt. It's part of being human and has been the condition of great saints during periods of their lives.

Yes and the dark night of the soul. I experience the dark night and spiritual aridity a lot. I should probably read again about the good fruits that come from such dryness and darkness.

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

Is that lacking in one's own religion "Olympianism (Greco-Roman polytheism)"? Please

Regards
___________
~ Dialectical Behavior Therapy: Current Indications and Unique Elements

Olympianism is, at its most bare, the worship of the Olympian Gods and Goddesses, usually along with many other Divine beings along with them (Nature divinities, spirits and such). Hellenic Virtues are used as a guide to daily life, generally. Whatever you choose to add to that is your own choice. You can practice Buddhism alongside of it.

 

[ChristineM]

As an atheist, I would kill myself. I have tried to be an atheist and it lead to me having nothing to live for but drugs and pleasure. It eventually lead to me stabbing a man and I found God in jail. If I knew there was no God, I would end this life and do society a favor.

I'm terrified of who I am without the creator. I am terrified to think of what will become of me if I become an atheist again.

I'm convinced that the voice inside me telling me to be good to others, think positively, renounce and reject the toxic thoughts, forgive others, be meek, humble, charitable, peaceful, and simple is God and spirit-guides directing me.

I'm too scared I'd hurt other people if I didn't believe in God and spirits.

Even as an atheist, wouldn't you agree that for certain people, having belief in God can be healthy? It can motivate them to do good works, be kind to others, forgive, avoid hurting others, and also give them the joy and peace to not hurt themselves

If I don't believe there are spirits guiding me, I'm a dangerous person.

I believe that all there is is the material world and that it essentially doesn't matter if I'm humble, peaceful, forgiving, and kind to people. Either way, I'm just going to die and not be held accountable for my actions and life becomes a selfish three ring circus **** show where I just live for the moment and pleasure and don't care about morals.

Perhaps a psychiatrist could help

 

[Darkstorn]

I consider the bad I do to be my will.

It is your will.

I consider the good I do to be God's will and that I did it with the help of my higher power and spirit-guides

No, it's still your will. In both cases.

I don't know. I'm sorry if i'm harsh, but most of this thread seems to be you being completely oblivious to the concept of accepting responsibility for your own actions. You need someone to be there for you to relinquish your power of self-control. That... Does not seem healthy or even mildly sane.

If you yourself admit that you only perform good deeds when you're under the impression that your actions are actually not yours but a deity's, then i don't think you understand either what responsibility means, or what being good actually means...

I think you need to work on your SELF, not your beliefs. You need to look upon all the problems, not try to find a miracle. If you keep doing mostly bad things, well maybe it's time to... You know, take control of your actions and NOT do bad things?

WHY are you doing only bad things in your opinion?

 

[Kapalika]

Have you considered a different religion that is kinda like atheism but isn't really?

 

[paarsurrey]

Olympianism is, at its most bare, the worship of the Olympian Gods and Goddesses, usually along with many other Divine beings along with them (Nature divinities, spirits and such). Hellenic Virtues are used as a guide to daily life, generally. Whatever you choose to add to that is your own choice. You can practice Buddhism alongside of it.

But Buddha did not bow or worship to any statue or idol. Did he? Please
Regards

 

[paarsurrey]

Have you considered a different religion that is kinda like atheism but isn't really?

There is no revealed religion like Atheism. Is there any revealed religion like Atheism. Please
Regards

 

[Saint Frankenstein]

But Buddha did not bow or worship to any statue or idol. Did he? Please
Regards

I don't know if he did or didn't. I'm not that knowledgeable about Buddhism to say. But Buddhism can be combined with other religions.

 

[Spiderman]

Have you considered a different religion that is kinda like atheism but isn't really?

Sort of. My Religion is basically listen to the heart. It is there that I believe spirits speak. It isn't Atheism, but it is more similar to atheism than other Religions because it doesn't follow Bible or Dogma, but I go to Catholic Mass because I feel close to Mother Mary when I'm there and that is comforting and energizing.

I go with what gives me results rather than Dogma or Scripture. I also go with what is most rational and charitable, so I embrace a form of universalism, where I believe every Religion is a path to the heaven that is most appropriate for that particular person that embraces that set of beliefs.

 

[Spiderman]

It is your will.
No, it's still your will. In both cases.

I don't believe so. I have undergone a lot of transformation that has made me the opposite person of who I was in many ways. I believe God is responsible for this transformation.

I don't know. I'm sorry if i'm harsh, but most of this thread seems to be you being completely oblivious to the concept of accepting responsibility for your own actions.

I behave differently when I believe someone is watching. I also am in love with some of these spirit-people (people on the other side) that I do good deeds and avoid offending others because I believe my beloved spirit-guide wants me to.

If you yourself admit that you only perform good deeds when you're under the impression that your actions are actually not yours but a deity's, then i don't think you understand either what responsibility means, or what being good actually means...

I believe the good actions are inspired by a Deity or the result of how a Deity helped transform my mind, heart, and soul. There is also choice from me as well, so yes, it is also my will too. But I know that before the transformation, my will was evil.

I think you need to work on your SELF, not your beliefs. You need to look upon all the problems, not try to find a miracle. If you keep doing mostly bad things, well maybe it's time to... You know, take control of your actions and NOT do bad things?

WHY are you doing only bad things in your opinion?

I've done a lot of good. It's just, I have undergone a transformation, a change of heart and mind. I believe God and spirit guides are responsible for that change. Before that transformation I was very cold, bitter, morbid, evil, selfish, and crazy. I dread the thought of ever becoming that person again.

Some people are just naturally inclined to do what is wrong. I don't know why. That was who I was and is not who I am anymore. All I'm saying is that a power greater than myself is responsible for the change.

 

[Fool]

I don't believe so. I have undergone a lot of transformation that has made me the opposite person of who I was in many ways. I believe God is responsible for this transformation.

I behave differently when I believe someone is watching. I also am in love with some of these spirit-people (people on the other side) that I do good deeds and avoid offending others because I believe my beloved spirit-guide wants me to.

I believe the good actions are inspired by a Deity or the result of how a Deity helped transform my mind, heart, and soul. There is also choice from me as well, so yes, it is also my will too. But I know that before the transformation, my will was evil.

I've done a lot of good. It's just, I have undergone a transformation, a change of heart and mind. I believe God and spirit guides are responsible for that change. Before that transformation I was very cold, bitter, morbid, evil, selfish, and crazy. I dread the thought of ever becoming that person again.

Some people are just naturally inclined to do what is wrong. I don't know why. That was who I was and is not who I am anymore. All I'm saying is that a power greater than myself is responsible for the change.

the eyes of truth are always watching.


The eyes of the LORD are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.

 

[Pudding]

It will be good if you yourself give your understanding of Atheist or Atheism,your own understanding not from a lexicon/dictionary. Please
Regards

My definition for 'atheist' is that:
A person who don't have the belief that at least one monotheistic god exists, and also don't have the belief that at least one non-monotheistic god exists.

 

[wicketkeeper]

It may be time to step out from all religious movements and to spend time in simple meditation, which will calm the mind. When doing simple tasks be at one with what it is your doing and keep your focus on your doing; sounds like mindfulness, and the good thing about this doing meditation it calms the mind(with practise !).

Finally, when I asked what is my religion I tell them it is 'to live from the heart'. When I fail, I go over why I failed and try to not make thhat mistake again.

 

[ChristineM]

But Buddha did not bow or worship to any statue or idol. Did he? Please
Regards

Buddhism in its truest sense is not a religion, no worship involved. So the question is moot.