You saying I wasn't worshiping Jehovah is basically saying I wasn't a Christian and dismissing the faith I once had. Just because it was a different denomination with a different interpretation of the Bible doesn't mean that I wasn't worshiping Jehovah.
Do the math SW...if Jehovah is not a vindictive despot who tortures souls in a fiery hell forever...then you were NOT worshipping Jehovah. Any church that promotes that lie was never "Christian" to begin with. It dishonours the Creator and makes people like you give up out of despair.
Jehovah never stops offering a hand unless we stop reaching for it.
So does he not care enough to give a stern correction to those like me who tried to follow but were tormented beyond reason? I've certainly had not signs or visions or learned anything secrets, not even at my most desperate when I was trying very hard to cling onto my faith. I didn't want to let go, it was all I knew, it was all I had, but it was killing me.
You don't need a stern correction...you need a loving healing. You need understanding not judgment, condemnation or punishment.
When Jesus gathered the crowds to teach them, he healed the people of their afflictions first. This was just a brief demonstration of what will happen here on earth when he brings his kingdom to redeemed humanity. We can look forward to becoming the person we want to be...the one we know we can be.
How many times did you pray the Lord's Prayer in church? What did the words mean to you? Do you know what Jesus was teaching us to pray for?....with the coming of God's kingdom, under the leadership of his Christ, everything that is wrong will be rectified. God's will can then "be done on earth as it is in heaven."
You won't get visions or signs or revealed mysteries....all you will get is the truth and the ability to comprehend it. Trying to cling to a faith that teaches you about a cruel and vindictive God makes it almost impossible to love him. You have to lose that image of him because he is nothing like that.
Sexual preference issues can make serving Jehovah a challenge, but with his help, you can succeed in living a productive and satisfying life while we wait for the real healing to come. This is what he offers to all despite everything, and I believe that he wants us all to succeed and gain the benefits of the new world to come.
Seeing ourselves there....this is what keeps my faith strong.