I'm glad things are better now.Let me just say that I am hiding behind rule 6 so will not write anything further.
Sam has had a couple departures from reality in the time we've been together. (In a serious sense.) I remember looking at him, realizing no one was 'home'... Logically, I should have been scared, but I was suddenly released from all my fears... including my long standing fear of heights. He'd hid from me on the roof, knowing I'd be too scared to come collect him. I came out the window, and he yelled, "you can't be here, you're scared!" I said I was not, and I started dancing.
Being lifted from my fear like that was the strangest damned feeling...
I haven't been able to speak of that night since it happened. It was a year or two ago.
Sam is better now. He can still be an ******* sometimes, but no mental breaks like that.