The Random, Meaningless Announcements Thread 3!

[Revoltingest]

I like the bacon sky in your pic.
Is that why you like it?

 

[ChristineM]

Change of subject...

This morning i went for an eye exam. Its 20km over windy mountain roads with a few straight bits.

I witness something i remember from a film, i can't remember which film but the baddy wound up driving into the back of a cart of horse manure.

So i am tootling along at a steady 80kph (the legal speed limit), taking the bends bends like i am on the track, feeling good and a BMW comes screaming up behind me, headlights flashing pulling out to overtake, another bend ahead so pilling back behind me to tailgate.

As we were clearing a bend before a good straight where i could pull over and let the lunatic pass he pulled out, hand on horn and shot past me. Turning in his seat waveing his fist and gesticulating with not nice finger signs.

I could see what was going to happen and could do nothing about it. Ahead a tractor with a trailer load of dung was pulling into the road. The idiot BMW driver was so busy giving me the finger that when he turned back round it was too late.

All four tyres smoking as he braked hard and almost made it. Just clipping the back of the trailer the tailboard droped dumping a pile of cow **** on his bonnet (hood).

I waved and smiled at him as i drove past.

 

[ChristineM]

Our system of inches, feet, yards, furlongs, acres, chains, rods,
troy ounces, avoirdupois ounces, troy pounds, avoirdupois pounds,
grains, foot candles, drams, pints, quarts, fluid ounces, teaspoons,
tablespoons, pottles, gallons, etc is so simple.

Don't forget the cups and cents and dollars

 

[Revoltingest]

Don't forget the cups and cents and dollars

I left out many more than that.
It's a system rich in measures, eg, horsepower, manpower.

I forget the ratio.
I once owned an engine rated at 5 manpower.
(Less than 1 horsepower.)

 

[ChristineM]

I left out many more than that.
It's a system rich in measures, eg, horsepower, manpower.

I forget the ratio.
I once owned an engine rated at 5 manpower.
(Less than 1 horsepower.)

I have i cycle that is 1 womanpower

 

[Revoltingest]

I have i cycle that is 1 womanpower

Engines here never used that unit of power.
(Women just don't put out enuf....power that is.)

 

[sun rise]

The metric system is taking over just like the next President, AOC.

We killed distance measurements of barleycorns, poles, furlongs and leagues. Links and chains are gone. Hides are gone. Perches now only refer to fish and such like. Roods are history. Inches and feed will be next to cancel.

 

[Revoltingest]

The metric system is taking over just like the next President, AOC.

We killed distance measurements of barleycorns, poles, furlongs and leagues. Links and chains are gone. Hides are gone. Perches now only refer to fish and such like. Roods are history. Inches and feed will be next to cancel.

The world will become a bunch of metric
loving monkey touching Dieters.

 

[sun rise]

Don't forget the pun lovers. No one will cancel pun lovers. Or they better not try or they will be of course punished.

 

[sun rise]

 

[ChristineM]

Engines here never used that unit of power.
(Women just don't put out enuf....power that is.)

You know nothing, voila a one american woman power american cycle

 

[Revoltingest]

Not much power being generated here...

 

[ChristineM]

Not much power being generated here...

 

[Wu Wei]

Change of subject...

This morning i went for an eye exam. Its 12mph 20km over windy mountain roads with a few straight bits.

I witness something i remember from a film, i can't remember which film but the baddy wound up driving into the back of a cart of horse manure.

So i am tootling along at a steady 50mph 80kph (the legal speed limit), taking the bends bends like i am on the track, feeling good and a BMW comes screaming up behind me, headlights flashing pulling out to overtake, another bend ahead so pilling back behind me to tailgate.

As we were clearing a bend before a good straight where i could pull over and let the lunatic pass he pulled out, hand on horn and shot past me. Turning in his seat waveing his fist and gesticulating with not nice finger signs.

I could see what was going to happen and could do nothing about it. Ahead a tractor with a trailer load of dung was pulling into the road. The idiot BMW driver was so busy giving me the finger that when he turned back round it was too late.

All four tyres smoking as he braked hard and almost made it. Just clipping the back of the trailer the tailboard droped dumping a pile of cow **** on his bonnet (hood).

I waved and smiled at him as i drove past.

First, I fixed that for you....

Had something similar happen to me on Highway 1 in California. Had a guy in a Ford Mustang tailgating me. Highway on is right on the ocean with a rock face on one side and a rather long drop to the ocean on the other, and it is loaded with hairpin turns, I finally found a place to pull off the road and he flew buy beeping, no hand gestures though. We stopped, walked around, took our time, then got back in the Jeep and headed back up the road. About 10 miles up the road there was a motorhome, going slow...and right behind him was our Mustang pal. And that is where hse stayed for several miles until the motor home cold pull off the road

 

[Wu Wei]

I like the bacon sky in your pic.
Is that why you like it?

You're a bacon addict...you know that don't you.....you should look for a 12 step program to get you off the bacon

 

[Revoltingest]

You're a bacon addict...you know that don't you.....you should look for a 12 step program to get you off the bacon

A 12 strip (of bacon) plan?
Sounds great!

 

[Wu Wei]

A 12 strip (of bacon) plan?
Sounds great!

Not strip...you pervert....STEPS!!!

For @Revoltingest

The 12 Steps of Baconoholics Anonymous

1. We admitted we were powerless over Bacon—that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves (Bears) could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of Bears as we understood them.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admit to Bears, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs...and introduce other humans to Bears
6. We're entirely ready to have Bears remove all these defects of character or anything else they wish to remove as well.
7. Humbly asked Bears to remove our shortcomings.
8. Make a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all, and Bears
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with Bears, as we understood them, praying only for knowledge of Bears will for us and the power to carry that out…or whatever they want to carry out or off
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to baconoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

 

[Revoltingest]

12 step program.....
1) Admit the power of bacon.
2) Realize the great power of bacon to bring sanity.
3) See step 2.
4) See step 3.
5) See step 4.
6) See step 5.
You see where this is going.

 

[Wu Wei]

12 step program.....
1) Admit the power of bacon.
2) Realize the great power of bacon to bring sanity.
3) See step 2.
4) See step 3.
5) See step 4.
6) See step 5.
You see where this is going.

You are a truly dedicated baconoholic....committed to your bacon induced demise I see

 

[Revoltingest]

You are a truly dedicated baconoholic....committed to your bacon induced demise I see

Bacon has been scientifically shown to provide
healthy knees, avoid headaches, & avoid dumb
computer uses needing assistance.
So...how's that bacon aversion work'n for ya?