I have been speaking to the underlying feeling of betrayal. This is an important part of the beginning of the spiritual development journey. It is contained within the following parable that Jesus told:
14 “Again, the Kingdom of Heaven can be illustrated by the story of a man going on a long trip. He called together his servants and entrusted his money to them while he was gone. 15 He gave five bags of silver[a] to one, two bags of silver to another, and one bag of silver to the last—dividing it in proportion to their abilities. He then left on his trip.
16 “The servant who received the five bags of silver began to invest the money and earned five more. 17 The servant with two bags of silver also went to work and earned two more. 18 But the servant who received the one bag of silver dug a hole in the ground and hid the master’s money.
19 “After a long time their master returned from his trip and called them to give an account of how they had used his money. 20 The servant to whom he had entrusted the five bags of silver came forward with five more and said, ‘Master, you gave me five bags of silver to invest, and I have earned five more.’
21 “The master was full of praise. ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!’
22 “The servant who had received the two bags of silver came forward and said, ‘Master, you gave me two bags of silver to invest, and I have earned two more.’
23 “The master said, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!’
24 “Then the servant with the one bag of silver came and said, ‘Master, I knew you were a harsh man, harvesting crops you didn’t plant and gathering crops you didn’t cultivate. 25 I was afraid I would lose your money, so I hid it in the earth. Look, here is your money back.’
26 “But the master replied, ‘You wicked and lazy servant! If you knew I harvested crops I didn’t plant and gathered crops I didn’t cultivate, 27 why didn’t you deposit my money in the bank? At least I could have gotten some interest on it.’
28 “Then he ordered, ‘Take the money from this servant, and give it to the one with the ten bags of silver. 29 To those who use well what they are given, even more will be given, and they will have an abundance. But from those who do nothing, even what little they have will be taken away. 30 Now throw this useless servant into outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’
The master = God
This parable is a metaphor for the “game” of life. The thing to understand is that we all start off as the servant who sees God as an unjust betrayer and squanders their one bag of silver. The servant who is “lazy”, “wicked”, and who has a low expectation of what they are capable of.
We also start off as someone who is resistant to or in denial of the reality of this game. This includes the following category of people:
Naive secularist - the world is loving and accommodating
Naive theist - God is loving and accommodating
Naive Pantheist - the Universe is loving and accommodating
Atheist materialist - the world is indifferent
Deist - God is indifferent
The similarity with all of these category 1 people is that they have yet to accept the conceptualization of God, the world, or the Universe as capable of betrayal or hostility. Because of this, they don’t identify with the metaphorical game described in the parable. Since they don’t identify with it, they don’t give much of their conscious attention to it. Therefore, they play it poorly.
Category 2 people include the theist who recognizes God as capable of betrayal and hostility, but see themselves as powerless, or see themselves as sinners who are worthy of betrayal. This category also includes the secularists who see the world as hostile and also see themselves as powerless. This category of people are incrementally more accepting and consciously aware of the game, but don’t see themselves as capable of playing the game well. They are only incrementally more consciously aware of the game because there will still be the tendency to deny or not want to participate in a game that you associate with failure and pain.
In order to play the game successfully as the investor servant who regularly proves worthy of more responsibility, it is necessary to both become more consciously aware of the game and more hopeful/optimistic about the game. To do this, one should see God as a betrayer but then attempt to “redeem” God by looking deeper. Similarly, they should see their own powerlessness/limitations and attempt to look deeper.
This is where ethics come in. To help cross this bridge, we can practice in our daily lives. When we experience an injustice, we can practice forgiving that person and when we fail, we can practice forgiving ourselves. As we develop this ability, we will be more capable of redeeming God, more capable of redeeming ourselves, and as a result more aware of the game and more capable in it.