"There is perhaps no better place to begin a discussion about being a trans woman than the quote that has become practically synonymous with that experience in the public's mind: that we feel like "women trapped in men's bodies." This saying has become so popular and widespread that it's safe to say that these days it's far more often parodied by cissexuals than used by transsexuals to describe their own experiences. In fact, the regularity with which cissexuals use this saying to mock trans women has always struck me as rather odd, since it was so clearly coined not to encapsulate all the intricacies and nuances of the trans female experience, but rather as a way of dumbing down our experiences into a sound bite that cissexuals might be better able to comprehend."It is not possible to be "born in the wrong body". We ARE our bodies.
-Julia Serano, Whipping Girl, Chapter 10.
Figured I'd pull the actual book out since you brought her up. It's a good read, I hope that maybe reflecting on this might persuade you to take a few steps back and reevaluate your understanding of the trans experience. The book is a manifesto against the scapegoating of trans women in attacks on the transgender community, and addresses most of the arguments you made in your post in a historically grounded analysis.