Why do some atheists have to be so insulting and mean?

[Trailblazer]

But she asked it of people who would have had certainly not been present for any of the experiences she was describing, so it sure seems to me that she was trying to establish a stereotype.

Why do people try to guess what I mean by what I say and what my motives were? That is what got this whole thing started with the atheists on another forum. I was saying something about the afterlife and I meant that they would realize there is a good God after they die and they assumed I meant they were going to hell... No way could what I said be construed as hell, but they were projecting their own thoughts onto my post... Then I got blamed for it and put om moderation when what they should have done is apologized. Why do people think they know more about what other people mean than those people know?

I understand that you are just guessing and that is okay because you said "seems to me." But what you guessed was the exact opposite of what was. I like atheists, perhaps more than I like believers. That is why it hurts so much when One Atheist behaves like a jerk. It spoils my image of atheists. That is one reason I came here and posted that... To restore my image of atheists as good people.

Being charitable and assuming that everything happened exactly as she described, the implication is that her negative experience with atheists - which none of us witnessed - along with the experiences of others - which she didn't witness - are tied together by some common thread that people in a public thread would be able to speak to... IOW, some negative trait of atheists in general. Maybe not a universal trait (since she was careful to say "some") but still something that's related to atheism in general in some way.

I remember you from other posts and as i recall you are analytical, like me. FYI I posted that spontaneously late last night after I had been through hell on another forum, and I figured I could straighten out any misconceptions anyone had today, as I have. At the time of posting I was not sure exactly how much I wanted to share about my situation.

 

[Jayhawker Soule]

I said "some atheists" but I should have said "an atheist" since it was really only one.

So the OP - posted in a General Religious Debates Forum - should have been titles:

Why does one atheist have to be so insulting and mean?​

Seriously? In what universe in such a question a meaningful one for general religious debate? How is it even answerable without knowing that one atheist -- unless, of course, your implying that the atheism itself is somehow culpable?

 

[Trailblazer]

... so it's not completely impossible that she was minding her own business when atheists engaged her, but I'd be surprised if this was the case.

I was simply responding to a post that was posted to me on a religious forum and then I got blamed for HOW I responded. it was perfectly innocuous. I was just explaining how God's will and human free will interact. I was being analytical... Sorry some people don't like that but it was on a religious forum and it was not against the rules.

 

[Trailblazer]

Thanks for the feedback...

We try. We are not always successful due to the flimsy arguments unleashed by some believers but there is usually an underlying modicum of respect in play.

I wasn't even IN an argument. I do not get into arguments with atheists anymore because neither God or no god can be proven. Besides, I just got stuck believing in God... It's not my fault.

We should always endeavor to "do others as we would like to be done". If one is a relentless jerk it should be assumed that is how they want to be treated. The greatest balm against mean people is to treat them with effusive kindness and a sense of humor. They are trying (and succeeding) to get a rise out of you. That is why they do it. Deflect the comment and they will get looped into, "Wait, what? She didn't get all upset. This isn't fun."

I have tried being nice but it only makes matters worse. It is taken as weakness and he stomps all the more all over me. I have been so naive.

 

[Trailblazer]

Not always, but it's generally a reaction to years of mistreatment by those of faith...

That seems to be true for most but not for this one... he is just arrogant.

 

[Trailblazer]

I love Bahai. If others mock your religion of Bahai they are just ignorant. But I understand it hurts your feelings. I used to be very open, and when people were mean it hurts. Then I can choose to build a little wall. Of course then those people can't harm me BUT if closing is done not in divine harmony then I also loose my divine connection.

Thanks. That atheist normally ranks on Baha'i but that is not what happened this time. This time it was just me talking about God... like I cannot talk about God on a religious forum.

I am very open and that bothers people who are not open, because they do not understand why I am so honest since they are afraid to be honest... Why can't they just let me be me? I do not expect other people to be any way but how they are. I am starting to build my wall, it is the only way, but it is a low wall.

I love the beautiful black cat you have. When you meet again such a mean person just picture your cat.
What would your cat do? And then you do exactly what your cat would do !!!
And when I see the eyes of your cat, I am kind of 100% sure those people will never bother you again.

I have 10 other cats but she is rather special... Princess is her name.

 

[YmirGF]

I have tried being nice but it only makes matters worse. It is taken as weakness and he stomps all the more all over me. I have been so naive.

If I may be so bold, what is the nature of your relationship with this fellow?

 

[Trailblazer]

Trailblazer,
Atheists,
Atheists don’t believe in a God, so they believe that will not be judged on their actions. This leaves them open to do what they want to do, whenever they want to do it, with no ramifications.
Boy, are they in for a big surprise???

I do not usually say this but in this case I sure hope he gets the big surprise.... and I won't feel the slightest bit sorry for him.... Some people need to pay for how they hurt other people, over and over again, just because they cannot face themselves.

 

[Trailblazer]

I mean, it doesn't get any more insulting, than to judge a person after they have died. And to assume that they will be tortured (or simply be judged) by some beast-god, for all of eternity, simply because of a failure to believe in said god, due to a complete lack of rational evidence.*sigh*

I do not believe there is hell or that anyone will be tortured by God...
But all people should pay for their actions, whether they are a believer or a nonbeliever.
If they hurt other people they should hurt the way they hurt others... but they can escape that hurt if they are just kind.

 

[Geoff-Allen]

But I constantly have to defend myself from being call brainwashed and stupid and having dumb arguments, just because I believe in God and have a religion that is different from Christianity, a religion they do not know how to refute. Nobody deserves to be treated this way.

Do what I do - pray for them. Anyone who feels the need to resort to using insults or put-downs is not a particularly joyful soul.

 

[Shushersbedamned]

48% of Australia claims no religion, (outnumbering thevreligious) and one in ten Australians declare themselves 'convinced atheists'.

So it would seem to be you're exhibiting rather than identifying arrogance.

Unless you feel qualified to judge Australia and Australians of course.

Now you've lost me

 

[Trailblazer]

Certainly, though, there is no reason to make personal attacks by calling someone stupid. The best defense is to just stay on topic and not be drawn into the name-calling. Or not have the discussion.

What about when the one calling you stupid owns the forum? This is inexcusable be cause it is against his own rules. But I am done with that forum now.

On the subject of your supposedly irrefutable god, there is no reason anyone has to present a refutation, unless you are inviting it by telling someone about your version of god.. If you never tell anyone about your god, then you will never be offended when someone pokes holes in your concepts. If you don't feel the need to convince anyone else that your god exists, then there is no reason to every mention it to anyone. If you feel compelled to tell people about your god, then they have every right to question the validity of your claim. But not to make personal attacks.

I do not mind any of that. i just do not like the personal attacks... Even that I can take but I cannot take unjust treatment, lying about me, accusing me falsely and banning me for no good reason... but it is over now.

At the end of the day, the person making the claim has the burden of proof. Others are justified in their disbelief until you provide sufficient evidence to support the claim. Nobody can say with 100% certainty that a god does not exist, but the ones proposed thus far seem to lack sufficient evidence, or can often be shown to not exist as described.

That is why I do not argue about it. I do not claim to have proof that there is a God, only evidence. They do not like my evidence so why discuss it further? They do not like me and I am gone. I do not want to be where I am unwanted or wanted only if they can treat me like a dog on a leash. Sorry, no thanks.

 

[Shushersbedamned]

p I trusted someone and then they stabbed me in the back and lied about me on a public forum where I had been locked out so I could not explain what really happened. This is immoral and unjust... There are no more words....
.

I was permanently banned ever so recently unjustly. I just used a VPN to create a new account and went right back to speak my mouth clean of course as soon as it was noticed by my banner everything I had written disappeared and so did I. They can leave no evidence about their corrupt behaviour lying around.

 

[Trailblazer]

You seem need a god sitting on your shoulder to tell you how to behave , then make what is essentially irrelevant threats based on what is nothing more than faith based on fear.

Mean and insulting? Physician heal thyself

A surprise could be taken to mean they will find out there is an afterlife and a God after all. But if they behaved badly they should pay, just as a believer should pay if they behaved badly.

That is justice.

 

[Trailblazer]

And yet, because I'm an atheist, it's okay to call me "mean" and "insulting?" Curious, that.

NO, it is not okay to call you that unless you are mean and insulting... It is all about behavior, not belief.
It just so happens an atheist was mean and insulting to me, it could have been a believer.

 

[Trailblazer]

Some people are not nice. Atheism doesn't change that.
However I think it's fair to consider that people online often exhibit worse behaviour and manners than in person.
That's not an excuse (I personally find that abhorent) but it appears to be commonly true.

Thanks, I think that is true... It seems to be whatever one can get away with online, if someone is not nice. If they are nice they are nice everywhere.

What is really abhorrent is when they try to make it look like you are the one that is to blame for everything when they started the entire thing. On a forum, there is evidence in the posts who started what. Its despicable to blame someone else for one's own mistakes. A simple apology would prevent all of this but then they would have to admit they are wrong.

 

[Trailblazer]

"Bad" people see their chance, I didn't say no. I discovered I had all leechers around me. Universe works perfect I see now; I got plenty of opportunities to work on my issues. But only when I saw it. In the inbetween phase I also saw that I was kind of attracted to this kind of people [Jung of course could easily explain this behaviour].

This is one scenario that shows how someone can end up "being mistreated by an entire group". Reason is simple "I needed to learn to say NO, and not only say it but do it". I was the one who always forgives. Now that is finished. I tell them once my limits, if they cross it if they are lucky 1 extra warning but that's it. Took me a long time. But works perfect. Nobody never took me serious, because I didn't take myself serious.

So it's correct that I created it myself, by not taking myself serious, letting others walk over me. In the process to discover this, I have seen that many people were in the same situation. So I very well understand how all this happens, and also how to get out of it [solve it]. Not easy for the one who has to get out of this situation, and others who are "normal" I understand they don't understand it's such a big deal to say "NO".

Boy, what you just said describes me to a tee! I was always treated as if I was guilty so I felt guilty and I felt I deserved the abuse.... That is why I was the only Baha'i who was willing to take the abuse on that forum.... but last December I left of my own accord and I was so happy here.... but I made the mistake of going back and just giving them one more chance.... I should have known better, a leopard does not change its stripes. Whenever something happened it was always my fault and by not just leaving I sent a silent message that was okay to abuse me.... I got confused, I started to think it was my fault, but I knew it wasn't....

About 35 years ago, a psychiatrist told me to read a book entitled "When I say no I feel guilty." I didn't know why then but I know why now.

If I apologize now and go groveling for what was done to me then it is just an invitation to kick me around like a dog some more... No, I am done... I deserve an apology but I won't get one. Besides, I cannot trust people who lie. Do they believe their lies? I do not know and I do not care... A lie is a lie. It is always used to save face or manipulate others so they can have total control. Nothing is more important than the truth.

 

[Trailblazer]

Anyway, do you have an out? What I do is collage my feelings, journal, and listen to music. Sometimes I paint other times draw or color. Some ideas?

Thanks... I have my cats whenever I have time...
That forum is toxic because the owner is toxic and so is the main moderator. So it attracts toxic people... They are mostly nonbelievers but that is not why they are toxic... They are just sick, and that is being kind.

I should have known better than to go back there after I made a clean break last December but something drew me back.... When will I learn? I hope I have learned now. I have my own forum in the same forum group so anyone who wants to post to me can come there.... If they don't come then that is telling and I do not care.

 

[Trailblazer]

So the OP - posted in a General Religious Debates Forum - should have been titles:

Why does one atheist have to be so insulting and mean?​

Seriously? In what universe in such a question a meaningful one for general religious debate? How is it even answerable without knowing that one atheist -- unless, of course, your implying that the atheism itself is somehow culpable?

It should have been stated that way but it wasn't. We all make mistakes.
I am not even very familiar with this forum and its etiquette.

 

[Trailblazer]

If I may be so bold, what is the nature of your relationship with this fellow?

Not bold at all...
He is the owner of a forum that is supposed to be a religious forum for both believers and nonbelievers.