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Why making your children follow your religion truly is brainwashing

Curious George

Veteran Member
Again your talking about specifics. Relative morality exists and no one questions that. However there are intertwined non-relative morality. At least in those without psychopathic or sociopathic disorders.

But the overall moral arguments are required for the society as a whole to function. A single diviant holds no bearing on a non-relative morality.

Though I do concede to what (at least I think) legion was getting at that everything is subjective to the goal with regards to the individual. For that I don't disagree.


To counter or at least make clearer... you don't have to have a "belief" that loving your mother is good. Or a require a belief or logical reasoning to feel that children should not be killed or that you should protect or sexual mate.

These are all innate or instinctive rather than simply relative learned moral lessons.

Well if they are innate and instinctive then they do not need to be taught at all, do they. You don't need to teach a kid to love their mother- you can let the bonding process take effect. However, when you move to teaching this belief you have crossed the indoctrination line that others have drawn, by teaching a "belief" as a fact, when it is not a fact but rather a belief.

Again I have to repeate that you are talking about specifics. If I were in Japan in the year 1850 I would have to instill in my child to be respectful to the Lords, Samurai ect or they would be killed. That is a relative morality.

In the year 2010 I have to instill in my child that racism is wrong for them to function properly within our society.

But some of the base moral setting seem to be innate.


But their is still a belief about what is proper functioning and what is good or bad. Take Neo Nazis or kkk members. Some very much instill in their children beliefs that some races are inferior to others. This certainly will effect a child's ability to function within our society, yet it is still done. Similarly teaching a child beliefs such as we are all equal is also done. What is the difference between these beliefs? One will allow more versatility in society later. But whether this is a good or bad thing is also a belief. We will always tack on a value judgement. As I was earlier discussing, any attempt to extricate ourselves from this value judgement is only temporary. However- as a society- I do agree we make such judgements. That said, people have failed to demonstrate why telling your child that "God is real" before they can critically think is one of those choices we as a society should judge as wrong.

Let us be very clear here. We are not talking about just those religious groups who beat their children, who emotionally scar their children, who deny medicine to their children, who refuse to educate their children, who withhold food and water, or who sexually abuse their children. We are talking about any parent telling any kid that god is real, that karma is real, that spirits are real, or that magic is real. We are even talking about sprinkling water on a kid or putting a kid in the tub if the parent believes it will get the kid into heaven.
 

Monk Of Reason

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
Well, parents will talk about ery specific moral commands to children and by the definition of indoctrination that is being used, it would be indoctrination.

Hitting your sister is wrong

You shoulde organised

You have to be someone that is good for society

You must respect your parents

If you want to be a professional you need to better our grades


And many other claims will be made that wont be objective. You cant "critically convince" that it is best to share your things with your sister out of "rational thinking" unless you create a reward punishment mentality in wich you are still going to encourage or discourage certain behaviour by which you subjectively decide what is good or not.

By encouraging and discouraging behaviour through punishment rward you would still be indoctrinating becaude you are not doing it through "rational thinking"
"I should share with my sister so my dad is proud of me" is as rational as "I must go to church so my dad is proud of me" or as rational as "I must keep my room clean so my mother buys me that transformer toy I wanted" or "If I do well at school so that I become a good member of society then my dad will buy me that bike" etc.

Its the same.
I don't disagree with this. I don't think I"ve posted anything that has.
 

Monk Of Reason

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
Well if they are innate and instinctive then they do not need to be taught at all, do they. You don't need to teach a kid to love their mother- you can let the bonding process take effect. However, when you move to teaching this belief you have crossed the indoctrination line that others have drawn, by teaching a "belief" as a fact, when it is not a fact but rather a belief.
Again I don't disagree with this.


But their is still a belief about what is proper functioning and what is good or bad. Take Neo Nazis or kkk members. Some very much instill in their children beliefs that some races are inferior to others. This certainly will effect a child's ability to function within our society, yet it is still done. Similarly teaching a child beliefs such as we are all equal is also done. What is the difference between these beliefs? One will allow more versatility in society later. But whether this is a good or bad thing is also a belief. We will always tack on a value judgement. As I was earlier discussing, any attempt to extricate ourselves from this value judgement is only temporary. However- as a society- I do agree we make such judgements. That said, people have failed to demonstrate why telling your child that "God is real" before they can critically think is one of those choices we as a society should judge as wrong.

Let us be very clear here. We are not talking about just those religious groups who beat their children, who emotionally scar their children, who deny medicine to their children, who refuse to educate their children, who withhold food and water, or who sexually abuse their children. We are talking about any parent telling any kid that god is real, that karma is real, that spirits are real, or that magic is real. We are even talking about sprinkling water on a kid or putting a kid in the tub if the parent believes it will get the kid into heaven.

I know for a fact that religious indoctrination is brainwashing and damaging to children. Not even extreme versions but the "light" versions as well.

But I was simply stating earlier that not all morality is relative or learned.
 

Curious George

Veteran Member
Again I don't disagree with this.




I know for a fact that religious indoctrination is brainwashing and damaging to children. Not even extreme versions but the "light" versions as well.
Is this- you know from personal experience, but cannot prove it for all religious indoctrination? or can you actually make a case, beyond the tenuous "it limits the child's choices later by instilling a preference?"

But I was simply stating earlier that not all morality is relative or learned.

Sure it is. All morality must be learned, because the concepts on which they are based are learned. For instance, if your mother birthed you on a deserted island and died, but you survived by the grace of your mute, illiterate father, how could you instinctively know to love your mother? We learn all sorts of things through feelings. no one has to tell us anything. We all will come to similar conclusions because the same chemical reactions occur and create similar feelings. Take away those chemical reactions and you might very well have one of your "exceptions" on your hands. Thus, nearly everything is learned to some extent. The process of socialization is so intertwined, I am not even sure that it is possible to disentangle with one hundred percent accuracy how much is biological and how much is environmental.
 

Me Myself

Back to my username
I don't disagree with this. I don't think I"ve posted anything that has.

Then I guess I must have misunderstood you somewhere.

That is my main argument though and e relevant part for this thread too:

Teaching kids to abide by your morality is as indoctrinating as teaching them to abide by your religion.
 

Magic Man

Reaper of Conversation
I am listening.

Your son says I dont care about the others, its okay to lie and cheat others if you dont get caught, etc.

How could you unarbitrarily tell him its not okay?

Morality is a subjective choice.

It's pretty easy. I'd tell him that if he does those things, he's likely to cause trouble for himself. I'd explain to him how it's in his own best interests to treat people as he'd want to be treated.
 

9-10ths_Penguin

1/10 Subway Stalinist
Premium Member
Well, parents will talk about ery specific moral commands to children and by the definition of indoctrination that is being used, it would be indoctrination.

Hitting your sister is wrong

You shoulde organised

You have to be someone that is good for society

You must respect your parents

If you want to be a professional you need to better our grades


And many other claims will be made that wont be objective. You cant "critically convince" that it is best to share your things with your sister out of "rational thinking" unless you create a reward punishment mentality in wich you are still going to encourage or discourage certain behaviour by which you subjectively decide what is good or not.

By encouraging and discouraging behaviour through punishment rward you would still be indoctrinating becaude you are not doing it through "rational thinking"
"I should share with my sister so my dad is proud of me" is as rational as "I must go to church so my dad is proud of me" or as rational as "I must keep my room clean so my mother buys me that transformer toy I wanted" or "If I do well at school so that I become a good member of society then my dad will buy me that bike" etc.

Its the same.

Empathy is rational; it's just an example of logical consistency.

Presumably, the child has at least a few desires that he wants to impose on others (e.g. "my sister shouldn't hit me" or "my classmates shouldn't tease me"). Once you explore his reasons behind these restrictions he wants on the behaviour of others, you'll inevitably get to something that applies in the other direction, too, e.g.: "my classmates shouldn't tease me because it makes me feel sad, and it's bad to feel sad"; the "its bad to feel sad" part can now form the basis for why the child shouldn't do things that make others feel sad.

... and suddenly, you've demonstrated morality to the child using nothing but logical consistency and the feelings he was feeling anyway.
 

9-10ths_Penguin

1/10 Subway Stalinist
Premium Member
Is this- you know from personal experience, but cannot prove it for all religious indoctrination? or can you actually make a case, beyond the tenuous "it limits the child's choices later by instilling a preference?"



Sure it is. All morality must be learned, because the concepts on which they are based are learned. For instance, if your mother birthed you on a deserted island and died, but you survived by the grace of your mute, illiterate father, how could you instinctively know to love your mother? We learn all sorts of things through feelings. no one has to tell us anything. We all will come to similar conclusions because the same chemical reactions occur and create similar feelings. Take away those chemical reactions and you might very well have one of your "exceptions" on your hands. Thus, nearly everything is learned to some extent. The process of socialization is so intertwined, I am not even sure that it is possible to disentangle with one hundred percent accuracy how much is biological and how much is environmental.

Morality is about as subjective as nutrition is. Morality is a system of behavioural codes and value judgements based around maximizing benefit and minimizing harm for society. This is a generally objective standard that a society's moral system can be measured against.

Yes, if you isolate someone so they never learn about morality, their moral system will probably end up being deficient, but this doesn't make morality subjective... no more than his lack of knowledge of a proper diet would make nutrition subjective.

And like nutrition, while we can have reasonable disagreement on some issues (e.g. "is the Atkins diet more nutritious than a vegan diet?"), the big questions (e.g. "are rocks and poison nutritious?") have clear, objective, demonstrable answers.
 

LegionOnomaMoi

Veteran Member
Premium Member
Morality is about as subjective as nutrition is.
For the majority of history, women in most cultures were considered subhuman. Other cultures were considered subhuman and there was nothing immoral about wiping them out. We can say what morality is based upon a moral system we already have like this:
Morality is a system of behavioural codes and value judgements based around maximizing benefit and minimizing harm for society.
But even then we run into trouble. Look at this thread. Some people argue that indoctrinating children into religion is wrong and others disagree. Both are arguing on the basis for maximizing benefit and minimizing harm. When people argue that we should outlaw abortion, ban gay marriage, even make homosexuality illegal, they are arguing on the very basis you claim. They simply believe have different definitions of what is beneficial to society and what is harmful.



Yes, if you isolate someone so they never learn about morality, their moral system will probably end up being deficient, but this doesn't make morality subjective
True. Morality is subjective regardless. Nutrition tells us that if you eat certain foods you will have certain effects. This is absolutely not true in society because depending on social structures different actions will (tend to) have different consequences. Social systems can be quite robust and yet unbelievably brutal. That's actually the norm. I know there are all those "golden rule" quotes that are supposed to represent such diverse cultures. They almost never due. Quoting a Greek philosopher saying something about treating others like yourself doesn't change the fact that the prevailing moral code was "do good to your friends and evil to your enemies". In the most famous version of the golden rule, it is introduced in opposition to a then standard much like the Greek version. Again, this is the norm. Morality is a natural and guaranteed aspect of any and all social systems. Without a degree of empathy, society can't function at all. But it is amazing how little is required for society to function.

the big questions (e.g. "are rocks and poison nutritious?") have clear, objective, demonstrable answers.
What would be some clear, objective, demonstrable answers when it comes to morality? When someone argues that women shouldn't have rights, that certain races don't qualify as people and can be subjugated or wiped off of the face of the earth (as is happening now and has been for most of history in one way or another) what can you say about this other than that you don't think it's right?
 

idav

Being
Premium Member
What would be some clear, objective, demonstrable answers when it comes to morality? When someone argues that women shouldn't have rights, that certain races don't qualify as people and can be subjugated or wiped off of the face of the earth (as is happening now and has been for most of history in one way or another) what can you say about this other than that you don't think it's right?

Science has done well do demonstrate our ignorances which has helped us look at the world and our neighbors with more compassion. Just like nutrition there are clear harmful ways to treat people, children and even the environment. Consequently the world changes with the times as we realise we ought to act different.
 

LegionOnomaMoi

Veteran Member
Premium Member
Science has done well do demonstrate our ignorances which has helped us look at the world and our neighbors with more compassion.
"Science" gave us eugenics and only recently have we realized how much social, cognitive, and behavioral research is thrown into question because of the incorrect assumption that typical Western college students could in way be representative of populations from fundamentally different cultures.

Consequently the world changes with the times as we realise we ought to act different.
The more it changes, the more it stays the same.
 

idav

Being
Premium Member
"Science" gave us eugenics and only recently have we realized how much social, cognitive, and behavioral research is thrown into question because of the incorrect assumption that typical Western college students could in way be representative of populations from fundamentally different cultures.


The more it changes, the more it stays the same.

Unfortunately knowledge can be used for good, evil and anything in between. Which makes ought questions important. At least shedding some of the ignorance has helped, its important when power becomes more readily available due to increase of general knowledge.
 

LegionOnomaMoi

Veteran Member
Premium Member
At least shedding some of the ignorance has helped, its important when power becomes more readily available due to increase of general knowledge.

The problem with whether something has helped or not is that it is based entirely on one's definitions on what society ought to look like. Nobody is arguing that it is ok to exterminate entire peoples or that women shouldn't have rights because of science (although they will use "science" to justify atrocities). The sciences really don't have much to say here. At best, they can tell us that if social systems are to be structured in a particular way, x, y, & z are good policies. The problem with using any tools here is that they are all dependent on assumption- that initial "if we want x to be the case, then..."
 

Knight of Albion

Well-Known Member
Adherence to a faith is meaningless unless it is heartfelt and chosen.

Teach children the basics about all religions of the Light, so that they may come to decide for themselves the path that is right for them - and also understand their brother man's perspective.
 

LegionOnomaMoi

Veteran Member
Premium Member
Teach children the basics about all religions of the Light
What qualifies a religion as one of light?

so that they may come to decide for themselves the path that is right for them
So I have to teach them things I believe are incorrect and wrong just in case they decide...what? Why can't I teach them what I believe to be right but allow them to choose what it is they think is right as they become more and more capable (while teaching them the critical thinking skills to help them decide)?
 

idav

Being
Premium Member
The problem with whether something has helped or not is that it is based entirely on one's definitions on what society ought to look like. Nobody is arguing that it is ok to exterminate entire peoples or that women shouldn't have rights because of science (although they will use "science" to justify atrocities). The sciences really don't have much to say here. At best, they can tell us that if social systems are to be structured in a particular way, x, y, & z are good policies. The problem with using any tools here is that they are all dependent on assumption- that initial "if we want x to be the case, then..."

Certainly is a problem, when two people are handed the same tool called a gun (for hunting of course) one ought to be weary of the other. ;)
 

Falvlun

Earthbending Lemur
Premium Member
My point is just that it's not as simple as "Well, it's the parents' beliefs, so they should pass them down". That only applies when the beliefs are ones you agree with.
No, not really. Like I said, what constitues a "bad" belief is going to be extremely subjective, and thus, I wouldn't want to label people bad parents just for believing what they do.

I'd rather just not pass down beliefs.

I think you'd find that pretty much impossible.
 

9-10ths_Penguin

1/10 Subway Stalinist
Premium Member
For the majority of history, women in most cultures were considered subhuman. Other cultures were considered subhuman and there was nothing immoral about wiping them out.
And for the majority of history, many cultures had ideas about food that resulted in scurvy, rickets, and other damaging health effects. We now say that their diet was deficient, nutritionally speaking. By a similar process, we can say that those cultures that subjugated women had deficient societal codes, morally speaking.

We can say what morality is based upon a moral system we already have like this:

But even then we run into trouble. Look at this thread. Some people argue that indoctrinating children into religion is wrong and others disagree. Both are arguing on the basis for maximizing benefit and minimizing harm. When people argue that we should outlaw abortion, ban gay marriage, even make homosexuality illegal, they are arguing on the very basis you claim. They simply believe have different definitions of what is beneficial to society and what is harmful.
First off, I think we need to recognize that we're dealing with "Atkins vs. vegan"-type nuances here. AFAICT, everyone in the thread agrees on the vast majority of the relevant moral precepts. Everyone here agrees that parents have a moral duty to see to their children's well-being. Everyone here agrees that individual autonomy should be valued to some degree (nobody is arguing for arranged marriages, for instance) but not above all else (nobody has argued that a child should be free to touch a hot stove if that's what he chooses).

This whole question, as I see it, is about the relative value of the belief that will result from religious indoctrination as a child versus the autonomy of the child and the adult he'll become. Some of this is a matter where normal ranges in human values will result in different conclusions; some of it comes to different assessments of the facts, where one side is right and the other side is wrong (even if we can't identify which one yet): for instance, I think everyone here would agree that suffering in Hell for eternity would be contrary to one's well-being if it was to actually happen, but we disagree on whether it's likely to happen or not. I think a fair bit of this debate comes down to factual disputes where not all viewpoints are equal, even though we can't tell which ones are right or wrong right now.

True. Morality is subjective regardless. Nutrition tells us that if you eat certain foods you will have certain effects. This is absolutely not true in society because depending on social structures different actions will (tend to) have different consequences. Social systems can be quite robust and yet unbelievably brutal. That's actually the norm. I know there are all those "golden rule" quotes that are supposed to represent such diverse cultures. They almost never due. Quoting a Greek philosopher saying something about treating others like yourself doesn't change the fact that the prevailing moral code was "do good to your friends and evil to your enemies". In the most famous version of the golden rule, it is introduced in opposition to a then standard much like the Greek version. Again, this is the norm. Morality is a natural and guaranteed aspect of any and all social systems. Without a degree of empathy, society can't function at all. But it is amazing how little is required for society to function.
I think we need to back up here. I'm arguing that morality is defined in terms of the well-being of individuals. I agree that many societies function without really seeing to the well-being of their members, but I think we need to make a distinction here.

To use the analogy of nutrition again, nutrition isn't just a matter of the question "what should we eat?" it's a matter of the question "what should we eat to maximize health?" There may be answers to the question "what should we eat?" that have nothing to do with nutrition... for instance, maybe someone thinks that eating should be about maximizing the pleasure from delicious food.

Similarly, morality isn't just a matter of the question "how should we behave?" It's about the question "how should we behave to maximize well-being?"

What would be some clear, objective, demonstrable answers when it comes to morality? When someone argues that women shouldn't have rights, that certain races don't qualify as people and can be subjugated or wiped off of the face of the earth (as is happening now and has been for most of history in one way or another) what can you say about this other than that you don't think it's right?
Two of the big ones would be that, all else being equal, life is preferable to death and lack of pain is preferable to pain.
 

LegionOnomaMoi

Veteran Member
Premium Member
And for the majority of history, many cultures had ideas about food that resulted in scurvy, rickets, and other damaging health effects.
The difference is that ideas about food are correct or not. That is, either a lack of certain nutrients tends to lead to health problems of specific types or it does not. The link between physical health and biology is nothing like the link between emotional/mental well-being and biology.

By a similar process, we can say that those cultures that subjugated women had deficient societal codes, morally speaking.
We can, it's just based solely on one's opinion. There is nothing deficient about it unless you start with the assumption that women should have all the rights men do.

First off, I think we need to recognize that we're dealing with "Atkins vs. vegan"-type nuances here.
In general, the thread has been that way. But then I disagree with most on this. This is, after all, very much related to what I study (indoctrination, that is). Cognitive universals vs. culturally-based values are vital to understanding how the mind works. From what I can see (what the evidence suggests) people in the West tend to
1) assume that values, judgments, cognitive processes, etc., are more universal than they are
&
2) underestimate just how vast cultural differences can be and how little the most logical argument can make to millions of people alive today who disagree with the fundamental values common to most Western cultures

I see how thoroughly being raised speaking English vs. certain other languages can make a difference, let alone the differences between e.g., cultures where the moral system is based on opprobrium and a communal "self". I don't see religion as that different from the necessary indoctrination that occurs. It can be severe but it need not be and everything from political beliefs to moral beliefs are just as much a matter of indoctrination.

Basically, starting from the view that there is an objective morality is about as religious as it gets.



This whole question, as I see it, is about the relative value
To refer to relative value is basically a way to refer to say "given that what I see as valuable and important for society, what about the stuff I don't particularly care for?" All value is relative and within each value system the relative value of x is greater or lesser than y based on a subjective criteria.
the autonomy of the child

Children simply aren't autonomous. I believe it is better to try to encourage this, but I acknowledge this has a lot to do with how I was raised: I was encouraged to embrace Catholicism but taught to question and think critically. I cannot determine how I would think differently were I raised differently and neither can anyone else. Why? Because to raise children is to indoctrinate them.
I think a fair bit of this debate comes down to factual disputes where not all viewpoints are equal
Interesting. I didn't even think of it that way. I am so used to despairing that anything can be determined regarding such disputes given how much the "factual" parts can't themselves be determined I don't even consider the factual part anymore. There's no point.

I'm arguing that morality is defined in terms of the well-being of individuals
How would you define this and what makes it non-subjective? For example, if one thinks believe that women shouldn't have a voice and should be ruled by men because that is in their best interest, then how does one argue with this? This is the fundamental issue with using logic to debate moral issues. It works only insofar as one can agree on the premises. And there is too much disagreement here.


Two of the big ones would be that, all else being equal, life is preferable to death and lack of pain is preferable to pain.
All else is not equal, though. My go to example is pharmaceutical companies trying to market drugs like antidepressants in places like china where a fundamental cultural precept is "life is suffering". How do you sell drugs to make someone feel better in life and about life when they believe that life is about suffering and that one must embrace this suffering? Not well.
 

Falvlun

Earthbending Lemur
Premium Member
It appears that those who have a problem with parents teaching children religious beliefs is because (they believe) that these beliefs aren't true.
 
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