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another **** page.

Aquitaine

Well-Known Member
Herein lies the problem with the perpetuation of ****-shaming. Feministic movements cannot control that the term "****" will continue to be deemed negative within parts of our culture. There's nothing that women can do to change that.
Not that I wish to just butt-in to the conversation, but for what it's worth I remember there was a big protest over the use of the term "****" in, I think Canada.

From what I saw, it was virtually an all-female protest, that got quite a bit of people around the world (including the Media) talking. Slutwalk I think was it's name.

Now, people have debated over the motives and "helpfulness" of Slutwalks, but just for the record I thought it would be interesting to mention, after reading your comment.
 

MysticSang'ha

Big Squishy Hugger
Premium Member
Not that I wish to just butt-in to the conversation, but for what it's worth I remember there was a big protest over the use of the term "****" in, I think Canada.

From what I saw, it was virtually an all-female protest, that got quite a bit of people around the world (including the Media) talking. Slutwalk I think was it's name.

Now, people have debated over the motives and "helpfulness" of Slutwalks, but just for the record I thought it would be interesting to mention, after reading your comment.

Slutwalks and other movements like Riot Grrrl are deeply divided among feminists, which explains the division in this thread considering how to consider the impact of the term and how feminists ought to react. I don't see any problem with varied opinions about the term. It just shows how we've grown as a movement and how we've become so diverse as a gorup.

From the wikipedia entry on the Riot Grrrl movement:

“BECAUSE we girls want to create mediums that speak to US. We are tired of boy band after boy band, boy zine after boy zine, boy punk after boy punk after boy… BECAUSE we need to talk to each other. Communication/inclusion is the key. We will never know if we don’t break the code of silence… BECAUSE in every form of media we see us/myself slapped, decapitated, laughed at, objectified, raped, trivialized, pushed, ignored, stereotyped, kicked, scorned, molested, silenced, invalidated, knifed, shot, choked and killed. BECAUSE a safe space needs to be created for girls where we can open our eyes and reach out to each other without being threatened by this sexist society and our day to day ********”

My point of introducing the Riot Grrrl movement to the discussion is because it was a reactionary movement to male-defined punk culture. And so with that in mind, I offer the wiki entry on Slutwalks that you mentioned, A:

On January 24, 2011 Constable Michael Sanguinetti spoke on crime prevention, addressing the issue of campus rape at a York University safety forum at Osgoode Hall Law School. He said: "I've been told I'm not supposed to say this – however, women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized." Co-founders Sonya Barnett and Heather Jarvis decided to use the word "****" in their response. They observe that historically, "****" has had negative connotations, and that their goal is to reclaim the term.

Their website states
"We are tired of being oppressed by ****-shaming; of being judged by our sexuality and feeling unsafe as a result. Being in charge of our sexual lives should not mean that we are opening ourselves to an expectation of violence, regardless if we participate in sex for pleasure or work. No one should equate enjoying sex with attracting sexual assault."

This is a position that I agree with. It's essentially like re-claiming the term b**** or whore or c*** to disempower the negative connotation of the term....but only on our standards. Not by the very people who historically have used the term against women to control their sexual and reproductive choices.

To be fair, however, and for the purposes of the discussion, there are plenty of counterpoints to the ideas and the motives of Slutwalks...from the wiki entry linked above:

Others have noted that the use of the word "****" raises the hackles of those anxious about the "'pornification' of everything and the pressure on young girls to look like Barbie dolls". Melinda Tankard Reist, notable for her stance against sexualisation of children in modern pop culture, said: “I believe the name will marginalise women and girls who want to be active in violence prevention campaigns but who don’t feel comfortable with personally owning the word ****." Feminists Gail Dines and Wendy J Murphy have suggested that the word **** is inherently indivisible from the madonna/whore binary opposition and thus "beyond redemption." They say: "Women need to find ways to create their own authentic sexuality, outside of male-defined terms like ****."

I think these are good points to consider. However, I believe that if we were to redefine the etymology of these terms and the sexual binary cultural standards, I think it's narrow to focus only on the "whore" part of the Madonna/Whore binary, rather than focusing equally on the male genderizing of monotheistic deities and mythical heroes and other cultural terms that use male definitions as the default.

Obviously, we all have very different ideas as to how to tackle these problems. ;)
 

Wherenextcolumbus

Well-Known Member
Not that I wish to just butt-in to the conversation, but for what it's worth I remember there was a big protest over the use of the term "****" in, I think Canada.

From what I saw, it was virtually an all-female protest, that got quite a bit of people around the world (including the Media) talking. Slutwalk I think was it's name.

Now, people have debated over the motives and "helpfulness" of Slutwalks, but just for the record I thought it would be interesting to mention, after reading your comment.

The issue I had with slutwalk is that it started off as a protest against victim blaming and then became about reclaiming the word ****, which is a lesser issue and does nothing for women's progression.
It also excludes women who don't dress in revealing clothing and still get raped, by turning the protest into wearing only underwear and writing **** across your body. What about Muslim woman? What about women who don't want to reclaim the word **** and are still being raped and blamed for their rape? I thought it was really disappointing to turn such an important issue into whether or not women should call themselves sluts in a "empowering way."
 

dawny0826

Mother Heathen
Can you give an example of what you find to be approving comments?

I'm considering context, here. Look at the first picture on the website. This woman appears to have contributed her own photo to the site. She appears to have commented on her own photograph and feeds the "climate" of the site by commenting on the sex she had that night.

Read other comments. The majority are..."I want to get with that" type of comments. I don't construe these comments as disparaging, considering the CONTEXT of the material presented on this website.

I'd evaluate context differently, if I knew that the photographs were stolen and submitted without the knowledge of the featured women or those featured were underrage, as I've stated before.

Well, destroying the **** stereotype doesn't mean to tell women they're acting like sluts because they took their clothes off. Destroying the stereotype IMO requires society to place the agency and responsibility back on the people who are reacting to women who are taking their clothes off. It's a common tactic to scapegoat women when they are the target of attacks, of disrespect, and of ****-shaming.

Heather, I think it's more complicated than this. And I do believe that sometimes that which is interpreted as an "attack" isn't intended as an attack. Sometimes, harsh opinion stings and is internalized when it's not directed towards an indivdiual - but merely towards a blanket lable characteristic that someone might find objectionable.

I find it anti-feministic to demand that others stifle their opinion, even if it's objectionable to women or results in shame, in a general sense. Americans should be able to freely express their opinions.

However, when we begin to infringe upon rights, my opinions change.

Please don't construe my opinions regarding this Facebook Page as a support of ****-shaming. There's no way in hell I'd support a woman being verbally bantered for being raped, assaulted, or for making decisions that are in her best interest.

But, I don't equate calling a woman who fits a particular stereotype and self-identifies as "****" - to be **** shaming - in the same sense as someone who has been verbally harassed because she was raped or chose to abort her baby.

I do support the right to criticize and protest as long as it does not cross boundaries that can cause a woman undue harm, but, not merely in the sense of offense.

Further, I don't object to women being able to dress as they want to dress or to live their lives as they want to live. But, women do need to acknowledge how their actions influence stereotypes and the larger picture of activism and equality.

Some women sexually objectify themselves, fueling the negative stereotypes that no single woman can eradicate on her own.

I'm not saying that women can't dress as they please and shouldn't be able to freely express without harassment.

But, a comment under a facebook picture that a woman submitted herself is hardly the type of FLAME comparable to a woman being harassed without any sort of provocation.

I draw a parallel to how stay-at-home moms back in the 1970s were told they were holding feminism back by choosing to stay at home for their kids and not finding their independence. It's a stereotype that stay-at-home moms are infantilized backward-thinking women who aren't doing their part in fighting for equality. That's a position I do not agree with. Women should be free to choose their position in their marriages and how they contribute or save in the economy.

Agreed and great example.

My parallel is that it isn't that we should be telling women they shouldn't be acting like sluts, that they shouldn't be stripping naked while asking for respect, that they deserve all the negative attention they get....I identify as a sex-positive feminist, and so my position is that women who celebrate their sexuality as their own choice ideally should not be disparaged for it. It's an ideal I'm striving toward, not to decide how a woman "should" act in order to garner respect for being a woman.

I think you do raise a very good point here. You're right, as women we should be empowering each other to live as independently and confidently as possible. And I don't agree with the messaging that women "deserve all the negative attention they get".

I do not understand the woman who would self-identify as "****" or without qualm sexually objectify herself or identify her behavior as sexual but then take issue if others PERCEIVED her behavior in such a way.

There's a hypocrisy to that type of mindset. That doesn't mean that she's not deserving of respect. Every human being is deserving of a basic level of humanitarian respect. And I do not believe that anyone has right to harm her or infringe upon her rights and safety BECAUSE of her choices.

However, if she chooses to place herself in situations where she's exploiting herself...she must expect that feedback, positive or negate will be par for the course. Realistic expectations are important. It might be beneficial for everyone to try to understand the psychology of others and their reaction to behavior and projections.

We've tried that tactic for a long time. I prefer to look at where and why sexual displays by both men and women are treated unequally, and if there is no rationality behind the difference, I challenge it..

Perfectly reasonable.

If a woman is flipping her top up, I don't find that disrespectful. But if a woman is attacking others, and SHE is making disparaging comments about other people, I find that to be worthy of a sharp retort. Not when she's just living her life.

There is a difference between attacking someone directly with comments in an unprovoked manner vs. expressing negate opinion in retort to that which an individual has presented themselves.
 

Alceste

Vagabond
Dawny, the woman who made that comment is not the woman in the picture.

Please stop claiming women are submitting these pictures of themselves to this page unless you can provide evidence. The administrator openly acknowledged in his comments that it contains no original content.

Photos submitted by women, if there are any, will be in the "recent posts by others" section, not the front page.
 

Alceste

Vagabond
Administrator comment I found on the site: "it's hilarious reading through the posts by others, especially the supposed sluts asking to be added. You do realize they're all fake accounts right? The fact they only have ten friends and two photos of different models should clue you in. I wish I could tag every idiot who falls for it".

How about that - he says you're an idiot if you think actual women submit their own pictures to that site. His words, not mine.
 

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
Also I have not counted but I do not agree that the "majority' of the comments are not disparaging.One of the most recent comments on that site is "dirtier than Paris Hilton's p*****.Why is Paris Hilton being degraded on that site?
 

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
Administrator comment I found on the site: "it's hilarious reading through the posts by others, especially the supposed sluts asking to be added. You do realize they're all fake accounts right? The fact they only have ten friends and two photos of different models should clue you in. I wish I could tag every idiot who falls for it".

How about that - he says you're an idiot if you think actual women submit their own pictures to that site. His words, not mine.

I think the owner/admin is a woman.
 

Alceste

Vagabond
Also I have not counted but I do not agree that the "majority' of the comments are not disparaging.One of the most recent comments on that site is "dirtier than Paris Hilton's p*****.Why is Paris Hilton being degraded on that site?
Paris Hilton is being degraded there because **** shaming is the purpose of the site, and as a woman who had been known to make sex tapes with boyfriends and wear bikinis on TV, Hilton should expect to be called a skanky, dirty whore.
 

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
IOW its O.K if I go out in public ..anyone has the right to take a photo of me..post it on FB and anyone can say anything at all about me.Talk about my smelly c*** and how much I like it up the ***.Its just totally wrong.
 

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
Paris Hilton is being degraded there because **** shaming is the purpose of the site, and as a woman who had been known to make sex tapes with boyfriends and wear bikinis on TV, Hilton should expect to be called a skanky, dirty whore.

Exactly.She gets what she asked for.
 

Alceste

Vagabond
IOW its O.K if I go out in public ..anyone has the right to take a photo of me..post it on FB and anyone can say anything at all about me.Talk about my smelly c*** and how much I like it up the ***.Its just totally wrong.

I agree! I was being sarcastic.
 

Alceste

Vagabond
I saw a post by her(Im assuming) telling the guys NO I will not send you naked photos of myself so stop asking and stop sending me photos of your dicks I dont want to see that .

Oh, lol, I read that and still thought he was a guy. Created a funny image. I was thinking, ha ha, serves him right. Lol.
 

DallasApple

Depends Upon My Mood..
Speaking of that it seems to be a running theme.The smelly stinky dirty comments.For people who seem to be somewhat obsessed with vagina's you would think they wouldn't complain so much about how they smell.
 
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