Do your beliefs make you happy?

[☆Dreamwind☆]

Yeah I'm content with my beliefs. It's not nor has it ever been the sole reason for when I'm happy.

 

[osgart]

Beliefs are things that one feels to be true but cannot prove, or cannot know for sure. My beliefs in my religion compel me, they motivate me, but they do not make any difference to my happiness. If my beliefs are true that's great, if not then that would be immensely sad. There's really nothing I can do about it.

Some parts of my religion I can safely say are knowns.

 

[Trailblazer]

Try to stay aware of opportunities. Ten years ago I rarely left my house. I'd have anxiety attacks in the grocery store and be tempted to just lie down in the floor, right there. I never did, nor did I ever leave my cart just to get out of there. I did however often go check out after only picking up a few items on my long list.

I began a turn around by a dear neighbor that heard I might be Quaker and stopped by one day while I was reading on the porch to ask if I knew about the meeting only one town over. After discovering more about me, she ended up asking me if I'd be interested in joining her and a few others from her Baptist church to sing hymns with the residents of a rest home once a month. She's never pushed me about her church and has let others know there's no need, though they try anyway. But that once a month semi-commitment got me back into the world.

I eventually joined the same neighbor in a creative writing group that meets once a week. From there, I was introduced to the need for volunteers for an adult ESL class. And other opportunities are always popping up, but I'm as busy away from home as I want to be. Each brings me joy, sometimes big, sometimes small.

I never had any anxiety attacks like that except when I was out in the car driving when there was weather conditions and I could not see well enough to drive.

I was never in the world except when I used to work in the office and that was enough of the world for me. For over four years I have been working from home and that is a preferable situation because I don't have to put on a happy face and make light conversation.

There are plenty of opportunities for me to attend Baha'i functions but I am not interested in what the Baha'is are doing so I don't attend. However, I started attending the Baha'i Feasts every 19 days on Zoom and that was a big step for me. I might starting to attend their activities in person but only when I am ready.

 

[Kathryn]

I am an extrovert so it is killing me to be home alone in my new home in a new town.

 

[Trailblazer]

Right now I seem unable to live out the challenges life is throwing at me and maintain happiness.

If this is a personal failing, I accept it.

I feel the same way about the challenges facing me but I do not see it as a personal failing to NOT be able to maintain happiness since I am under no obligation to be happy. I will be happy when there is something to be happy about, not before.

Right now I'd be really happy just to have someone who can help me groom these cats. I have plenty of money but that does not help. Nobody wants to help me and I have made so many calls. So I am going to try to do what I can by myself although it is a dangerous proposition for a couple of them, for me and for them.

 

[Trailblazer]

I am an extrovert so it is killing me to be home alone in my new home in a new town.

A new home in a new town, that sounds like a fantasy. I'd be happy just with the new home.
Since you are an extrovert is there a reason you don't get out? I am an introvert so I have no need to get out.

 

[Trailblazer]

Absolutely

Will you still be happy if that doesn't happen?

Heaven or Hell (if those are your beliefs) is a state of mind. So you're not wrong technically.

Yes, it is my belief that Heaven and Hell are states of the soul, which is a state of the mind.

 

[Kathryn]

A new home in a new town, that sounds like a fantasy. I'd be happy just with the new home.
Since you are an extrovert is there a reason you don't get out? I am an introvert so I have no need to get out.

Oh I plan to get out, believe me. I mean, this is way out of state and out of my town for sure, and my house is still a wreck. I just moved about two weeks ago. This home by the way, is well maintained but it's 75 years old! It's older than me!

 

[Trailblazer]

Oh I plan to get out, believe me. I mean, this is way out of state and out of my town for sure, and my house is still a wreck. I just moved about two weeks ago. This home by the way, is well maintained but it's 75 years old! It's older than me!

My house is and will probably remain a wreck. I found a great handyman last winter who came over and looked at work that needs to be done, but then he left the state and went down to Texas to do some work for a client. Meanwhile I have two rental homes that need work so my residence is always the last to have work done on it.

I love older homes. My homes are not new. One is 1950 and the others are 1974 and 1986.

 

[The Hammer]

Will you still be happy if that doesn't happen?

Let me clarify, there isn't a "me" as in this named personality that reincarnates. So this question doesn't really apply.

Yes, it is my belief that Heaven and Hell are states of the soul, which is a state of the mind.

Then I think you should reevaluate the way you see the world perhaps. If your state of mind is "to return is the worst thing imaginable" to me then would mean you already are in Hell mentally.

 

[Bear Wild]

Originally I had two cats, from the early 1980s until the late 1990s.
After that I had a much larger number of cats, but now I only have 8 cats indoors, although I feed two feral cats outdoors.

 

[Spice]

Absolutely

I, too! Let's see if we envision reincarnation possibilities similarly.
Three things in this life that have found to be long-term disappointing that I hope to have success in another are: I grew up without a mother -- maybe next go around? I've lived a life of nearly continuous sleepiness -- I've had narcolepsy since around age 8, so maybe next time I can enjoy sunrises? And I had miserable relationships and I had so hoped to give children a loving, wonderful 2-parent homelife -- maybe next time?

Heaven or Hell (if those are your beliefs) is a state of mind. So you're not wrong technically.

But all in all I feel my life's been good -hard at times - but good. Makes me wonder what I went through before! LOL

 

[Trailblazer]

I don't think my beliefs make me happy directly. I'm happy because my life is how I want it to be, which is dependent on those beliefs and a lot of luck. There's nothing more I want but more of the same for as long as I can have it.

I hope you appreciate how lucky you are to have life the way you want it although I am not suggesting you thank God.

Is it moot? Here's an example of a belief of yours that may be limiting your happiness. I'm not suggesting that you change in that regard. I understand that that is probably not a good idea for you. But if you had never had such an objection and it were not an issue one way or the other, you might find a compatible significant other. Or, you might find sorrow.

It is a moot point because I have no interest in sex and that would be true even if I had no religious beliefs. As you might recall I was not always like this. I used to love sex, and the disinterest I have now has nothing to do with my religious beliefs, since I don't even think I would want sex even if I was married. I don't really know what happened and I am not worried about it since lack of desire causes me no unhappiness.

There's another example of how belief can affect happiness.

I said "A good day is a day I am content with the way things are, regardless of all the things I have to be worried about, legitimate worries."

Why do you think that is related to any beliefs I hold?

And again. I'm also free all day and have no money concerns. But because I have a happy marriage, a home and garden I enjoy being in, dogs that bring me joy, good weather, things to keep my mind stimulated, and as much of a social life as I would like while being essentially desire-free and worry-free, I enjoy every day. You seem to think that such a life only brings fleeting happiness, but it's been a formula for sustained satisfaction for fifteen years now.

Obviously, your life situation is much different fro mine, and there are many reasons for that, none of which has anything to do with beliefs. For one thing you have a marriage and a social life and one house to maintain. I am a widow and will probably never remarry, I don't enjoy socializing, and I have eight Persian cats and three houses to take care of all by myself. I also have a full tie job as long as I choose to continue working, which I have done since there is no reason to retire.

What would be fleeting for me is not fleeting for you since you do not hold my belief that there is another world after this world, but there is nothing wrong with being happy in this world, if you can do it. I have never been able to do it for long owing to my life circumstances, not because of my beliefs.

It might look like I have a choice but I do not believe I have a choice in most things that affect my life.
I believe that our choices are determined by many factors that we have no control over, so I think that free will is very limited.
I covered that in this thread :

Do you really have a choice?

I believe that God knows everything that will ever happen to everyone throughout their lives and all that is written on the Tablet of Fate. I believe that some things that happen to us in this life are predestined (fated) by God, and we have no control over these things. However, I believe...

www.religiousforums.com

You have one more car than we do, and ours is also about 25 years old. Since we live in a village and most destinations are walking distance or at most a short drive, we don't drive much, so it has less than 80,000 miles on it.

I have two cars that were totaled by the insurance company which I bought back from the company. One is the car I drive tat has a big dent but that does not affect the drive-ability. The other car cannot be driven because the driver's side door was damaged and will not close, so it has been sitting for about two years. Both these cars have over 200,000 on them. But like you I don't need to drive much, so there is no reason for me to buy a new car.

Our reason is that just about everything we want is right here or can be sent here. We'd need to travel about an hour to find a mall or fast food or see an opera, but none of that appeals any more.

That sounds nice. I don't need to drive very far either, in order to find what I need. The furthest I have to drive is about 10 miles if I have to go to the doctor or dentist or to the bank which I don't do very often. Normally I only drive to the post office for mail and to the grocery store for food once a week, and that is only about eight miles away.

It's in this sense that my beliefs bring me happiness. They leave free from desire, contention, and worry.

I see that as a good thing. Sometimes I wish we had control over what we believe, but I don't think we do.

You seem to have the same life more or less except that you live alone and are secluded. Maybe you prefer it that way, but if you lived in our village, you could live the same life but have as active a social life as you like, and I'm sure that you could meet men that didn't require a sexual relationship if male companionship were important to you. They needn't be roommates, and if they didn't like your cats, socialize outside the home - movies, plays, restaurants, garden clubs, ukelele groups, volunteering at animal rescue shelters, sketching groups, live music, etc..

For now I prefer to be secluded, and that is probably because that is the life I have led all my life. Even when I was married for 37 years we were secluded. The difference is that now I don't have anyone at home to talk to and I am still not used to this, even after almost two years.

Your village sounds idyllic, like a place I would like to live, and as I recall there is a big lake nearby. I am sure there are single people who retire and move down there. I guess I am not quite that adventurous but it would sure help if I knew someone who lived in the area. It would also help if I could speak Spanish.

Whatever you choose, you deserve happiness. You're a good person with a good heart. But you might need to make some changes. Seriously. If you have no family attachments or other reasons to stay put, how about coming to my part of Mexico and seeing what it has to offer you? We'd be glad to help you find a place to stay while you visit and to show you around. I'd love to meet you.

I know I deserve to be happier than I have been for so many years and I can only hope that happens someday. It not as if I was happy when I was married. the first half was happy but we started to have many problems in the last half, not with each other but with life. Finally, he was suicidal and wanted to leave this world, and that was long before the cancer took him.

Right now I am still working but there are some big changes happening at work regarding how I do my job so time will tell if I want to continue working. The biggest change is related to a new mapping software program I have to learn. So far it looks pretty daunting but I have a lot of support and understanding from staff, once reason I like my job.

That is awfully nice of you to suggest that. I would like to meet you too. It would be nice to come for a visit just to see what it is like. Meanwhile, can you remind me what your location is so I can do some research online?

 

[Nakosis]

What I am asking is whether you think that your religious or non-religious beliefs about God or gods are the ‘reason’ you are happy. I highly doubt that is the reason people are happy, although they might tell themselves that. If that is the reason they were happy they would not need enjoyable foods, alcohol, sex, traveling, etc., in order to be happy, but I think most people do need those things to be happy.

I think love is important for happiness, but it does not have to be love for God or romantic love. It can be love for friends and family. In my case, it is love for my cats and other animals, since I only have online friends and I have no family or romantic interests. Would I be happier if I had a boyfriend or a husband? I don’t know, but that is a moot point, since men do not date women like me who won’t have sex out of wedlock.

I think certain religious people believe we ‘should be happy’ just because we have our religious beliefs. This pertains mostly to Baha’is, but I think it also pertains to Christians. I don’t know what the other religions teach about happiness. I am sick to death of the expectation of Baha’is that I ‘should be happy’ just because I am a Baha’i. These people are clueless about my life situation and they do not care about it. They are like robots, fully indoctrinated by their religious teachings that tell them that we ‘should be happy' because we have God, no matter what life throws our way.

As for Christians, are you happy because you believe you are saved and forgiven by the blood of Jesus, and because you believe that Jesus/God loves you? That might be one reason you are happy but I doubt you would still be happy if you had a very difficult life situation or if you had clinical depression or debilitating anxiety.

My beliefs can support my being happy but they are usually not a part of the process.

What I experience in life makes me happy. I go about life and experience a thing that makes me happy.
I think my beliefs has more to do with my attitude about life. Having a more positive attitude helps to be happier under more circumstances than a negative one does.

It's not always easy to have a positive attitude, that's were belief/hope comes in. My hope for certain things and my positive attitude about them coming to fruition allows me to be happier more often than not.

When I lack the hope of things turning out the out the way I want them to I'm usually not happy as often.

I think what you are hoping for is important as well. I usually hope for lesser things or at least something that is achievable. If what you hope for isn't easily obtainable you can get disappointed which can cascade into a bad day.

I don't have any hopes about God or hopes about something from God so no disappointment there.

My big hope lately is that I wake up each morning. Every time I do, that's something to be happy about. Another day I get to experience stuff. Doesn't matter what as long as I'm alive to experience it.

 

[Twilight Hue]

What I am asking is whether you think that your religious or non-religious beliefs about God or gods are the ‘reason’ you are happy. I highly doubt that is the reason people are happy, although they might tell themselves that. If that is the reason they were happy they would not need enjoyable foods, alcohol, sex, traveling, etc., in order to be happy, but I think most people do need those things to be happy.

I think love is important for happiness, but it does not have to be love for God or romantic love. It can be love for friends and family. In my case, it is love for my cats and other animals, since I only have online friends and I have no family or romantic interests. Would I be happier if I had a boyfriend or a husband? I don’t know, but that is a moot point, since men do not date women like me who won’t have sex out of wedlock.

I think certain religious people believe we ‘should be happy’ just because we have our religious beliefs. This pertains mostly to Baha’is, but I think it also pertains to Christians. I don’t know what the other religions teach about happiness. I am sick to death of the expectation of Baha’is that I ‘should be happy’ just because I am a Baha’i. These people are clueless about my life situation and they do not care about it. They are like robots, fully indoctrinated by their religious teachings that tell them that we ‘should be happy' because we have God, no matter what life throws our way.

As for Christians, are you happy because you believe you are saved and forgiven by the blood of Jesus, and because you believe that Jesus/God loves you? That might be one reason you are happy but I doubt you would still be happy if you had a very difficult life situation or if you had clinical depression or debilitating anxiety.

I don't go by beliefs anymore. Guess I'm happy about that though.

 

[Trailblazer]

Let me clarify, there isn't a "me" as in this named personality that reincarnates. So this question doesn't really apply.

What I was asking is whether you will you still be happy if you do not come back to earth and reincarnate in a new body.
I believe it is the personality that continues to live after the physical body dies. but I do not believe that personality comes back to earth and lives again in a new body. I believe that personality (the soul) continues to live in the spiritual world in a spiritual body.

I know you don't believe that and I don't want to argue about it. Nobody knows what will happen after we die so these are only beliefs people hold.

Then I think you should reevaluate the way you see the world perhaps. If your state of mind is "to return is the worst thing imaginable" to me then would mean you already are in Hell mentally.

No, it doesn't mean that because my mind is not on this world, even though my body is in this world.

There are some nice things about this world but "to return is the worst thing imaginable" because the next world is so much better than this world, according to my beliefs.

 

[Jimmy]

Sure. Why not? It feels good to know the truth about how we got here and where we’re going.

 

[Trailblazer]

@Bear Wild

Did you intend to reply to post #59 ?

 

[Bear Wild]

My fear of accidents is one reason I don't drive very far anymore and I never drive when there is any snow or ice.

Sometimes I want to die, but I am not ready to die yet, at least not until I have my will in place.
Basically, it is my love for the cats that gives me the will to keep living, because I would never leave them purposefully.

For some reason this did not post originally.
I really appreciate your posts. I can relate with this one. There was a point when things did not seem to matter. But every morning I would wake up feed the two indoor cats and the two outdoor cats. It was waking up to feed the cats and put bird food out for the birds. In the evening I would feed the cats again and leave offerings for the raccoons and opossums. This kept me going because there was always someone that was appreciative of what I was doing even if they could not tell me.

When I found my pagan path I became connected with all life around me. This is what brought me happiness. It was when I would go out and hear the birds feel the trees and just be with all life around me that I found peace. The gods and goddess are just part of much greater world and that wonderous world is what if find the most happiness in. I now find I no longer feel all alone even if no other human is around.

I do know you are important and have support here.

 

[The Hammer]

What I was asking is whether you will you still be happy if you do not come back to earth and reincarnate in a new body.
I believe it is the personality that continues to live after the physical body dies. but I do not believe that personality comes back to earth and lives again in a new body. I believe that personality (the soul) continues to live in the spiritual world in a spiritual body.

I know you don't believe that and I don't want to argue about it. Nobody knows what will happen after we die so these are only beliefs people hold.

I'm not going to argue about it either. I can't answer a question from outside my perspective.

No, it doesn't mean that because my mind is not on this world, even though my body is in this world.

Trust me your brain is. Regardless of where you think your Soul resides. We are a tripartite body not dual. Mind/Body/Spirit complex.

There are some nice things about this world but "to return is the worst thing imaginable" because the next world is so much better than this world, according to my beliefs.

What next world, if heaven and hell are states of mind and not places we reside? There is only this world. Hence why I said it's where we return to. From there, what are you doing to ensure that you have a better world to come back to? At least imv

Edited: clarity, first line.