I am a good man, so why don't I have a girlfriend? Do I need to be a jerk instead?

[Father Heathen]

You have to posture. Girls love an act. The more pretentious the better.

This was meant as a facetious, tongue-in-cheek comment, btw.

 

[dawny0826]

Okay, its not an entitlement thing its more a I feel like a man who is dying of thirst and cannot find water.

I am frustrated because I long for love, sex, companion. I have been told "this is how you attract a woman" and yet my attempts to do via the instructions give to me have ended in failure.

Though I wonder at this "entitlement" thing. I am a human being and all human beings deserve to love and to be love be virtue of being human beings. I dislike your statement because it sounds to me as though you are saying that there are situation where a human being might not be worthy of love.

Rejection is an inevitable part of the process, when you're putting yourself out there - trying to date. All human beings do deserve love. The pursuit of companion is much like an adventure and a learning process, really.

If you're confident in yourself and what you want in a companion - be true to yourself and just be yourself as you meet people. You can't blanket label "womankind", as a room full of women are going to want different things in relationships.

Attraction is important. So is compability and genuity.

 

[cablescavenger]

Okay, its not an entitlement thing its more a I feel like a man who is dying of thirst and cannot find water.

I am frustrated because I long for love, sex, companion. I have been told "this is how you attract a woman" and yet my attempts to do via the instructions give to me have ended in failure.

Though I wonder at this "entitlement" thing. I am a human being and all human beings deserve to love and to be love be virtue of being human beings. I dislike your statement because it sounds to me as though you are saying that there are situation where a human being might not be worthy of love.

Patience is a virtue.

Girls aren't objects to satisfy others needs or urges, they deserve to be loved for who they are too.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts; don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Mary Schmich

I hate to say this but you could benefit from the sunscreen.

[youtube]sTJ7AzBIJoI[/youtube]
Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) - YouTube

 

[Twilight Hue]

Buy a Harley and start wearing Jeans, chains, and leather.
Start smoking and rebel against society.
Call women ******* and ******.
Use the techniques of the horse wispererer.

Allow for some time to pass.

 

[jasonwill2]

I just realized.

This is what lust spells are for, if you don't mind Satanic/LHP rituals. many RHP/pagan groups have some thign against manipulating others for some reason despite it is something we all do everyday in social situations.

 

[Iti oj]

just learn to flirt

 

[idea]

This thread is mainly directed towards the women on this site but guys can jump in if they have an insight.

I'm a decent chap, not perfect, but I am a kind and loving person. From what I understand I am what women say they want, a nice, kind, loving person and yet every time I ask a girl out I get a no, and the one time I did ask a girl out and she said yes after the first date she left me for some guy in her salsa dance class.

It has been suggested that I need to get to know these girls first before I ask them out so that they know for sure I am a good guy and feel safe with me. Yet for the past school year I developed friendships with a number of different girls and they all said no when I ask them out, except for the one girl I mentioned above her who kissed me on our one date, told me she had a wonderful time and then dumps me over the phone for the salsa dance guy.

I'm wondering if you actually want a nice guy. Like I've heard a number of other guys say that in order to get a woman, you need to be a jerk to her. Whenever someone has said this to me before I've been rather skeptical. Yet after not just acting decent but actually being a nice guy (I'm nice and chivalrous by nature and I am a bit replused by the idea of being an *******) I have no mate, and am wondering if these guys are right.

I feel as though I am being crushed under the weight of lonelyness and inadequacy.
It may sound ridiculous but I feel like grabbing collective womankind by the shoulders, shaking her and screaming "Here I am! I am a good and chivalous knight as you asked for! Then why am I alone?"

Do I need to be an ******* towards women? Do I need to sell my soul to have a companion?

You're just not looking in the right crowd. Studies show that women learn from their father's what to look for in a mate - how their father treated their mother, is what the girl will look for in a relationship. You need to find a girl from an intact happy family... intact happy families are harder to come by, but they do exist...

[youtube]3LQ80TFOGvw[/youtube]
Love Her Mother - YouTube

There are religious groups who value families, and in so doing, produce a population of people who have learned what a healthy relationship is:

Here are the stats on a few groups:
http://b27.cc.trincoll.edu/weblogs/AmericanReligionSurvey-ARIS/reports/ARIS_Report_2008.pdf

see table 9, pg 15, for who is best at staying married
then head on over to that group, and find yourself a good mate who understands what a healthy relationship is!!!

 

[Iti oj]

You're just not looking in the right crowd. Studies show that women learn from their father's what to look for in a mate - how their father treated their mother, is what the girl will look for in a relationship. You need to find a girl from an intact happy family... intact happy families are harder to come by, but they do exist...

[youtube]3LQ80TFOGvw[/youtube]
Love Her Mother - YouTube

There are religious groups who value families, and in so doing, produce a population of people who have learned what a healthy relationship is:

Here are the stats on a few groups:
http://b27.cc.trincoll.edu/weblogs/AmericanReligionSurvey-ARIS/reports/ARIS_Report_2008.pdf

see table 9, pg 15, for who is best at staying married
then head on over to that group, and find yourself a good mate who understands what a healthy relationship is!!!

my gf family is atheist mine went to church and guess which one is still together and happy.

 

[idea]

my gf family is atheist mine went to church and guess which one is still together and happy.

Did you read through the survey? yes, every trend has it's outliers... I could post some stats on what the norms for atheists tend to be, but that would just derail the thread so I won't...

 

[Debater Slayer]

Someone's being a "good man" doesn't mean that women have some kind of obligation to date him.

The best advice I can give is to be yourself; don't try to force yourself to act a certain way, and you will find the right person who will like you for who you are rather than what anyone thinks you should be.

 

[nnmartin]

It may sound ridiculous but I feel like grabbing collective womankind by the shoulders, shaking her and screaming "Here I am! I am a good and chivalous knight as you asked for! Then why am I alone?"

Do I need to be an ******* towards women? Do I need to sell my soul to have a companion?

What women want is a tough guy / bad boy.

Reasonable looks and muscles plus some power over other males.

forget all the nice guy crap, that's just tosh for the TV.

 

[Me Myself]

Ah that´s true. Having muscles rarely harm (unless it is "too much" (but most of us are way far from that ) ).

 

[nnmartin]

Women tend to like Playboys a lot too.

guys that can pull a lot of chicks send of the signal of power and sexual prowess.

Women like that.

 

[Me Myself]

Of course, if you are intereste din deep spiritual contact and emotional intimacy you might want to at least make some balance of it... (If even "act" that way at all)

 

[nnmartin]

Money is a great attractor as well of course.

and also, with money you need not care so much as you can always find a willing girl in a bar or on a street corner.

does the trick for me!

 

[nnmartin]

It's all a load of complete BS, this nice sensitive guy stuff.

You may be able to talk poetry, philosophy and history all night long, but if you have a low score in the Male Dominance index you will get nowhere.

Why do you think Rugby players always have girls?

 

[nnmartin]

Of course, if you are intereste din deep spiritual contact and emotional intimacy you might want to at least make some balance of it... (If even "act" that way at all)

that is a crock too, because even the spiritual guy needs to be a hunk to pull it off.

Women are animals in just the same way men are.

Love, marriage etc.. is all a fantasy.

let's face it , how many couples stay together when one of them becomes disabled, ugly or overweight?

not long in most cases.

 

[Chisti]

It's all a load of complete BS, this nice sensitive guy stuff.

You may be able to talk poetry, philosophy and history all night long, but if you have a low score in the Male Dominance index you will get nowhere.

Why do you think Rugby players always have girls?

You are right, but men are quite as shallow and would prefer beauty to character.

 

[nnmartin]

that is also true, and like I said - we are all just animals.

Those males and females who do not fulfill Nature's requirements in the reproductive stakes can find useful work in tending to the flock - as Nature also ordained.

 

[jasonwill2]

every girl ive tried being nice to didnt return it

i'll just be satan and all is well for if they don't like my passion they wont like me at all... i am passion

at that end 3 things in a girl i need...

1)open-minded

2)empathetic/right-brained

3) raw untamed passionate (like me)

if they dont have at least 2 of those im not intersted in them, also the third is hardest to find

anyway the best advice: be yoursefl and let the girl come to you... at least if you like girls with initiative