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Is having sex without a relationship aka a one time thing a Morally wrong thing and if so why ?

☆Dreamwind☆

Active Member
What do you mean by "relationship" exactly?

Personally, I'm not seeing how to humans can fornicate without a relationship. Whenever two humans interact with each other in any way, they are in some sort of relationship with one another. Beyond that, whenever two beings of any kind interact with each other in any way, that's a relationship - a connection. That's all a relationship is - a connection, an interaction.

So what kind of relationship? A lifelong mating partnership? Fornication buddies? Emotionally deep and substantive? Superficial and passing? Abuser and victim?
OP did say one time thing in the title. :)
 

Kathryn

It was on fire when I laid down on it.
I can't and don't and won't hate my son, who is living with his girlfriend. He is 35 and she is a bit older. They have been together for six years. I like her. I love him. Their choices are their choices, not mine. Two consenting adults.
 

VoidCat

Use any and all pronouns including neo and it/it's
What if the sex hurts the person emotionally after ?
Im not @☆Dreamwind☆ But there are some ways emotions after sex can be awful. Some are biological like subdrop and postcoital dysphoria. I'll find links on what those are later im about to eat dinner soon just figured I'd write this real quick. Both of those go away with time. Subdrop typically longer then postcoital dysphoria. Postcoital dysphoria can also be caused by fears of inadequacy, religious or sexual trauma, feeling you aren't good enough for your partner, being brought up. Usually talking to someone and time can help with those. Other things can be that the partner did something awful during sex even if not intentional that made a blow to self esteem. Like their partner may have made a comment like "oh I'm surprised you have hair down there" even if they liked said hair down there that could bring up some body insecurities for some folk. Or the person gets emotionally harmed because the scene was intense and they didnt have enough aftercare after. I'll send another link regarding what aftercare is.

Really most the time emotional harm if not malicious is accidental and usually not immoral feelings are valid. Most such harm can be avoided with communication prior during and after. If it involves bdsm then with vetting the partner, safewords, checkins, aftercare, and boundaries being discussed
 
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☆Dreamwind☆

Active Member
What if the sex hurts the person emotionally after ?
I've never encountered hurt feelings during a one night stand from myself or a temporary partner. At any rate people are more likely to hurt each other's feelings if they've been dating a while.

Our feelings get hurt in all kinds of relationships, not just romantic ones. Family members hurt each others feelings. Friends hurt each other's feelings too.
 

VoidCat

Use any and all pronouns including neo and it/it's
Im not @☆Dreamwind☆ But there are some ways emotions after sex can be awful. Some are biological like subdrop and postcoital dysphoria. I'll find links on what those are later im about to eat dinner soon just figured I'd write this real quick. Both of those go away with time. Subdrop typically longer then postcoital dysphoria. Postcoital dysphoria can also be caused by fears of inadequacy, religious or sexual trauma, feeling you aren't good enough for your partner, being brought up. Usually talking to someone and time can help with those. Other things can be that the partner did something awful during sex even if not intentional that made a blow to self esteem. Like their partner may have made a comment like "oh I'm surprised you have hair down there" even if they liked said hair down there that could bring up some body insecurities for some folk. Or the person gets emotionally harmed because the scene was intense and they didnt have enough aftercare after. I'll send another link regarding what aftercare is.

Really most the time emotional harm if not malicious is accidental and usually not immoral feelings are valid. Most such harm can be avoided with communication prior during and after. If it involves bdsm then with vetting the partner, safewords, checkins, aftercare, and boundaries being discussed
A link on subdrop explains not only what it is but how to manage it:
Not only subs can expearience this but also doms in a scene. It's basically an emotional and physical low after an extreme high. In a bdsm scene your body can put you in a very blissful scene and use up a lot of feel good chemicals. Once the body hits it's max after the scene it uses thise up and drops down and it takes time for the body to go back to normal. It could be a couple hours to a couple days after but once subdrop hits it can be very emotional and lasts for a couple hours to a couple weeks. It does eventually go back to normal but it takes a while.

That's on post coital dysphoria. It's a term only used to describe negative emotions after enjoying consensual sex. Often some folk dont know why they experience it. It just happens sometimes. There are risk factors and there is treatment for it. Best talk to a doctor if it's a common thing. It's not the fault of the partner most the time just it happens and sometimes needs treatment. I dont know much on this having only recently found out about it but worth mentioning that often folk enjoy the sex and have a great time but afterwards sometimes may feel this way either due to chemicals or other reasons and its often confusing for those that experience it. The link goes into risks factors for it if this sounds familiar to anyone.



This is a link on aftercare:

Aftercare is basically whether it's by yourself or with partners, checking in and seeing whst you and your partner(s) need after sex or a bdsm scene. Taking care of those emotions, if there's a partner(s) talking about stuff maybe cuddling, showering if needed, assuring you enjoyed everything etc...Maybe drinking water then taking a nap or having a snack. Everyone really having sex should practice selfcare and care of their partner(s) afterwards not just folk in bdsm tho the kink community seems to be the only community that talks about it as itis extremely important there. Aftercare helps to prevent PCD and subdrop as well. You can also practice this outside a sexual context...if you and a romantic partner maybe even just a close friend get into an intense argument after its resolved checking in with that partner seeing how they feeling and what they may need can really be helpful. That is aftercare really.


I dont see negative emotions after consensual sex a bad thing. It happens. Emotions are not immoral actions can be. A lot of things can be done to prevent negative feelings or migate them even in a one night stand. If you talking of emotional harm from actions and its not malicious or caused by the partner(s) causing trauma it's usually able to be worked on and prevented.
 
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Personally, I try to avoid it. I think it's one thing if you're in a relationship with a SO and one thing leads to another so to speak, but I don't go out of my way to look for casual sex with random strangers.

And as much as I don't like to make moral judgements on things that don't affect me directly, some religious traditions do consider it a sin.
 

☆Dreamwind☆

Active Member
I honestly don't believe in sin. I believe in ethical behavior. Sins were made up to oppressively micromanage people's lives to impossible standards. Ethical behavior allows a good balance between keeping our society running smoother, while allowing for reasonable amounts of personal freedom. It's a far more healthy thing.
 
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