Legalize Prostitution?

[lamplighter]

If this isnt something she woudl chose to do if she had her head on straight..How would legalising help?...Would it not in fact encourage her??..At least take the stigma off that at least its not against the law and make it easier for her to continue doing what is harming her?

Blessings

Dallas

It could very well help protect her under good circumstances. But obviously keeping it illegal isn't exactly detouring her either now. In fact I've met plenty of people who will and do, do things because they are in fact illegal, it's an adrenaline rush for them is why. The more laws you have the more outlaws you have and keeping prostitution illegal certainly doesn't seem to be helping anyone. As it stands now thousands of men are still unfaithful and still cheat on their wives, whether it be some strange woman at the bar or the prostitute on down the street, all I see it doing is hurting those who are afraid seek help because it's illegal and wasting taxpayer money trying to punish the prostitutes instead of helping them.

 

[DallasApple]

I don't see you as a freak, Dallas, but I wonder if you and your husband feel that prostitutes and those who pay for their services are.




Peace,
Mystic

I think we are all freaks in our own way..to be real honest..But I dont belive sex workers or those that buy sex are exceptioanlly freaky..But I do feel sad for them.

Blessings

Dallas

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I think we are all freaks in our own way..to be real honest..But I dont belive sex workers or those that buy sex are exceptioanlly freaky..But I do feel sad for them.

Blessings

Dallas

Why? Are they "tainted"? From your description of your husband's reaction to the hypothetical former-prostitute-scenario, I might assume this perspective from you and/or your husband.

FWIW, I agree with you.........we're definitely all freaks in our own way. :flower:




Peace,
Mystic

 

[Troublemane]

If this isnt something she woudl chose to do if she had her head on straight..How would legalising help?...Would it not in fact encourage her??..At least take the stigma off that at least its not against the law and make it easier for her to continue doing what is harming her

yes, I know the difficulty of the situation, but talking her out of it is NOT possible, not only is she highly intelligent but she knows exactly what shes doing and why. Its not a matter of convincing, its more a matter of letting her ask for help if and when she comes to that awareness.
Believe me, trying to change them, trying to talk them out of their lifestyle will only cause them to rebel, just to spite you. They may even turn all sweet and insinuate themselves in the life of someone tryin to help just to learn all their weaknesses and exploit them.
You wanna trust them but you really can't, so thats why I have said just decriminalize it, try to give them support, let off some of the pressure which actually makes this lifestyle tempting (in that it attracts self-destructive persons). The less stigma there is attached to it the less attractive the lifestyle will be to self-destructive people.

 

[Troublemane]

ya lamplighter has it right on, i totally agree.

 

[Magic Man]

I don't see how it being illegal helps anything. If you legalize it, you can regulate it better. It seems to me that it's the same as viewing homosexuality as a sin, and telling your homosexual child that they need to change or else be condemned. That doesn't help anything, and most of the time only causes harm, especially as evidenced on the thread here "My son is gay". There aren't many, if any, people who want to be prostitutes, but then again there aren't many secretaries who wouldn't rather be a movie star or something. And there aren't many people, if any, who like to pay for sex. So, people would still feel bad about it, if they would now, except they wouldn't be criminals.

 

[DallasApple]

I don't see how it being illegal helps anything. If you legalize it, you can regulate it better. It seems to me that it's the same as viewing homosexuality as a sin, and telling your homosexual child that they need to change or else be condemned. That doesn't help anything, and most of the time only causes harm, especially as evidenced on the thread here "My son is gay". There aren't many, if any, people who want to be prostitutes, but then again there aren't many secretaries who wouldn't rather be a movie star or something. And there aren't many people, if any, who like to pay for sex. So, people would still feel bad about it, if they would now, except they wouldn't be criminals.

Being a secretary when you dont want to is not the same as having sex when you dont want to Being a secretary does not require you disrobe and use your genitals ....Sorry I've doen both..There is no comparison.Havign sex when you dont want to messes with you in ways that fitting shoes on people doesnt.(I sold shoes)

If you want to pretend your sexuality is no different than your typing skills go right ahead..Maybe yours isn't..Mine is...

But I can see sex is going to continually be compared to other occupations not invloving the most intimate part of yourself,...

Im glad you think getting paid for what you do now is the same as havign sex with strangers for money..You are more evolved than me..

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Why? Are they "tainted"? From your description of your husband's reaction to the hypothetical former-prostitute-scenario, I might assume this perspective from you and/or your husband.

FWIW, I agree with you.........we're definitely all freaks in our own way. :flower:




Peace,
Mystic

Yes..I believe sexually they would be tainted..Especially if they continued to believe having sex was no different than any other job.Sex isnt a "job"..

I dont know if you are married or not..But I would like if you are for your husband to consider making love to you a job..or vice versa..(and forget the love part its just a service like a car wash)

Reducing sex to a job hurts people..Period..

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

It could very well help protect her under good circumstances. But obviously keeping it illegal isn't exactly detouring her either now. In fact I've met plenty of people who will and do, do things because they are in fact illegal, it's an adrenaline rush for them is why. The more laws you have the more outlaws you have and keeping prostitution illegal certainly doesn't seem to be helping anyone. As it stands now thousands of men are still unfaithful and still cheat on their wives, whether it be some strange woman at the bar or the prostitute on down the street, all I see it doing is hurting those who are afraid seek help because it's illegal and wasting taxpayer money trying to punish the prostitutes instead of helping them.

This made asolutely no sense...

Men will cheat on their wives anyway so lets legalise prostitution?

Thats like saying "kids will skip school so lets abolish the truency laws"....

There is right and wrong..You dotn legalise wrong because some will do it regardless.

Why in the world would you want to "help' a woman be a whore?..Why?

And its not "thousands of men" that are unfairlful...It millions...And women are not far behind...

So along with your theory I should be able to go hire a guy...(and my sisters) to have sex with men for money...

So the "massses" have legal paid for sex availble...Like a Super Wal Mart..But a super Sex mart..????

I know MANY marreid women who are desperate..Whos husbands are addicted to porn (legally) ...so we need brothels for women as well to help solve this problem and help out society..

Your right its the answer...and its only to help the poor prostitutes.Its doing them a favor...

Blessings

Dallas

 

[Valjean]

Oddly enough, Dallas, we are not completely in disagreement.
I stated that there was no objective difference between prostitution and other professions, and that the stigma was in your head; a social convention.

Your reply, if I read you right, is that for you, sex and acts involving the genitalia are too intimate, too emotionally charged to be in the same class as chiropractic. This is a subjective assessment, a learned attitude. I understand that many people share your attitude, but this does not change a subjective fact to an attitude, not an objective fact.

What is shameful, titillating, outrageous or scandalous is a matter of social convention. They change over time, they differ from culture to culture and, as artificial, man-made attitudes they can be changed or dropped entirely.

 

[Magic Man]

Being a secretary when you dont want to is not the same as having sex when you dont want to Being a secretary does not require you disrobe and use your genitals ....Sorry I've doen both..There is no comparison.Havign sex when you dont want to messes with you in ways that fitting shoes on people doesnt.(I sold shoes)

If you want to pretend your sexuality is no different than your typing skills go right ahead..Maybe yours isn't..Mine is...

But I can see sex is going to continually be compared to other occupations not invloving the most intimate part of yourself,...

Im glad you think getting paid for what you do now is the same as havign sex with strangers for money..You are more evolved than me..

Blessings

Dallas

Personally, no, I don't see the two jobs the same. I'm doing the job I'm in now even though it's not ideal. On the other hand, assuming no catastrophes befall me, I would not become a prostitute. I don't think it's the worst thing in the world, just not something I would do. I think you're missing the point of analogy. The same logic is involved with anyone who doesn't like their normal job as is involved with a prostitute who doesn't like it. Neither example likes their job, for different reasons, but ultimately it adds up to the same thing.

Seyorni has it right. There's really nothing inherently wrong with prostitution. One person wants to have sex, the other wants to make money. They each get what they want. It's only in your mind that prostitution is a horrible, degrading act.

And, by the way, many married women do see sex as a job, and the very rare man, too. My wife doesn't always want to have sex, but she knows that I like to, and so she "does her job" as a good wife. It's just like I do my job as a good husband by rubbing her shoulders, and making dinner, etc.

The problem for me with it being illegal is that it's, generally, two consenting adults. The prostitute may not want to do this for a living, but she's not forced to by the other person. Most immoral acts, at least those seen as immoral by most people, are one consenting person and a nonconsenting one. Murder, for instance, involves the murderer, and the victim who has no say in it. There are many other examples too.

 

[DallasApple]

My wife doesn't always want to have sex, but she knows that I like to, and so she "does her job" as a good wife. It's just like I do my job as a good husband by rubbing her shoulders, and making dinner, etc.

But your wife is sharing her body with someone who cares about her..Someone who is committed to her and takes care of her emotional well being.(Im assuming you are and you do) Someone who cares about her pleasure as well(back massage).She knows who you are you are not a stranger who is going to toss her some money walk off and either say.."see ya next week" or thanks and goodbye never to be seen again.

And I would not call her making love to you her "job"..marriage is not a "job". Its hopefully a long term even lifetime intimate relationship of give and take with mutual respect..its giving sometimes selflessly for the other persons emotional and physical well being out of love and concern of the other.If you think her giving that when she's not exactly in the mood is equivelant to experiencing what a prostittute does I hope she realizes thats how you think she feels.Im hoping your wife does not consider you a client either.And Im hoping you she doesnt feel like a prostitute for being with you or that its her "job" or occupation to keep you sexuall satisfied.It to me is a lot more complicated than to reduce it to those terms.

Maybe she derives her own emotioanal pleasure knowing she has made you happy and that brings her feelings of contentment and well being. Maybe it boost her female ego.Maybe it brings her closer to you and strenthens the bond she has with you even if sexually she isnt necessarily in need at the time.Thats what im saying..Most women I believe think of their sexuality in broader terms than just a physical act they can give a man.There is an emotional element tied right into it. including the need to feel desired by someone who is not just using their sex organs for sexual release..(for the most part anyway).

And I dont think this is a strictly societal view or outcome that women feel this way..I believe there is an instinct involved to "pair' for most.Men can more easily seperate the two..But even men can and do"fall in love" and want to only be with one woman and want all their sexual needs met by her and her only..Not that we all cant get in a rut and be tempted to committ adultery..My husband and I are both guilty of that to my shame..

But I imagine a prostitute has to struggle against some core instincts of pairing and bonding. continually.And to learn how to seperate her emotional self from her sexual self..I imagine over time she would become hardened and learn how to compartmentalize .Thats sad to me....But at if any time she wants to bring the two back together and think of her sexuality as a precious gift to offer to only one that she loves and recieve from someone who loves her she is most likely going to have a difficult time escaping the reality that she put a monetary value on this gift and sold it to the highest bidder over and over and over again.....IMHO...

Blessings

Dallas

 

[Smoke]

I agree that prostitution is a bad occupation for almost everybody who practices it. I just don't agree that criminalization helps.

 

[lamplighter]

This made asolutely no sense...

Men will cheat on their wives anyway so lets legalise prostitution?

Thats like saying "kids will skip school so lets abolish the truency laws"....

Oi, I never got caught skipping school so why not , just kidding but seriously why should the prostitutes have to suffer because of someone else? If anything it would probably be easier for the wife to find out if her husband was cheating if she could just go to her local brothel anyway. As it stands the prostitutes come out at night and hide from anyone that doesn't look like a customer so the man never gets caught and his wife continues to writher in agony of only having her suspicions. Making prostitutions illegal for this reason
would be like saying "Let's make amusement parks and beaches illegal because it encourages kids to skip school and not to mention the possible safety hazards!" (I grew up in Florida by the way and yes I had skipped school a few times to go to the amusement parks and beaches).

There is right and wrong..You dotn legalise wrong because some will do it regardless.

Why in the world would you want to "help' a woman be a whore?..Why?

Whats "wrong" about two consensual adults both getting pleasure out of something? As I've said before, and I know this seems hard to believe for some people, but there are women out there who really do want to be a prostitute, and it's not like it's a big secret that they've been with a bunch of other men, but if they don't care, and the customers don't care, then I don't see why someone else needs to take it upon themselves to care for them. Not to mention I know some women/girls who've had sex with a bunch of men/boys for free. So if anything I could respect the prostitute more, because at least they're getting more out of it.

And its not "thousands of men" that are unfairlful...It millions...And women are not far behind...

So along with your theory I should be able to go hire a guy...(and my sisters) to have sex with men for money...

Oi! Why not! But don't be a hypocrite about being unfaithful, I'm perfectly comfortable with women going to brothels paying for sex. I figured it was more likely millions but you really think that number is going to soar if prostitution becomes legal? Seems like all the unfaithful people are already cheating on their better half already. So I fail to see how keeping it illegal is going to quell anyone. Why, I'm more inclined to believe you're putting the person getting cheated at even more risk and more pain by letting all this unfaithful scum have sex with dirty unregulated prostitutes spreading STDs to unknowing partners.

So the "massses" have legal paid for sex availble...Like a Super Wal Mart..But a super Sex mart..????

That's just ridiculous, I mean do you see giant strip clubs with aisles and aisles of girls swinging around on poles? No, because there are only so many people interested in that stuff and too many men who would rather get it free.

I know MANY marreid women who are desperate..Whos husbands are addicted to porn (legally) ...so we need brothels for women as well to help solve this problem and help out society..

Actually an addiction to auto erotica is completely different than an addiction to sex, so making prostitution legal would make no difference really, because the addiction centers around masturbation.

Your right its the answer...and its only to help the poor prostitutes.Its doing them a favor...

Blessings

Dallas

Glad I could help!

 

[DallasApple]

O.K ya'll..You will think Im nutty..But I think there is a case for de-criminilising prostitution.Its not so simple though..there are still major problems with sex trafficers bringing in women to these leagalized areas..and or women going there voluntarily only to find themselves in a sex slave situation. And in Germany you have to be a citizen so the women that arent(citizens) are beign driven further underground and in the most dangerous situations because of it.One group called "COYOTE" is an American org. for "sex workers"..They themselves are not to keen on the idea of government controlled or run prostitution..mentioning things such as police brutality..and beign herded like cattle into clinics for testing..and feelings of being degraded in a brothel setting where they are lined up and chosen ...Also there are reports of abuse and hostile working envioroment in Nevada..Things such as being forced to work 12 hours at a time ...not permitted to refuse a client requesting them even while mentruating,ill,and even pregnant.Physical abuse not being permittted to be exposed or reported..and underpriveledged and vulnerable women beign brought there by "pimps" through coersion methods for a "finders fee"....

It seems to me the only real and obvious benefit to the women is staying out of jail. Which I guess is the right thing to do for them considering how demeaning and risky what they do already is.The patrons seem to have the most to gain if its decriminalised reducing their risk of disease eliminating the risk of being arrested and having a safe clean and guranteed place to get sex.

There is a book Im going to buy and read ...Called Backstreets...I do think that it is sad that the men believe the myth or buy into the believing that these women for the most part actually enjoy or like what they are doing..That is not what I've been finding on my "search"..I think it helps their conscious.Otherwise they might be disgusted with the fact she is really hating every minute of it and just wants it over with and in fact dreads it in most cases..I really have a hard time grasping how a man could enjoy that but Oh well...

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Actually an addiction to auto erotica is completely different than an addiction to sex, so making prostitution legal would make no difference really, because the addiction centers around masturbation.

Habitual and frequent use of porn can be included in the definition of sexual addiction from my knowledge.IOW you can be a sex addict and use of porn is one of your outlets.

Its like saying "chemically addicted" that can be to anythign for cigarretes to cocaine..And its not only limited to one chemical.

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

"Backstreets is a major breakthrough that takes us into the daily, lived experiences of prostitution to reveal its harsh and brutal realities. Nowhere else have we seen the violation that prostitution is to women so fully and sensitively revealed. From women's lives Backstreets exposes the lies of liberal romanticization of prostitution. The unavoidable conclusion of this work is that we must challenge every social condition that gives men license to use women in these ways."

—Kathleen Barry, author of Female Sexual Slavery​

"No single study has gone this deeply into the aftermath of steady involvement in prostitution on the self-images, self-feelings, and personal relations with the opposite sex for both prostitutes and customers. The similarities of some of these prostitutes' experiences with the reactions of survivors of incest and rape are also thought-provoking. Few studies ever present this much data on the backgrounds, strategies, and life-styles of customers and pimps. This 'triangulation' of the world prostitution— utilizing data about a significant number of women, clients, and pimps— provides an unusual depth to this work."

—Barbara Sherman Heyl, Illinois State University​

Backstreets is about prostitution. It allows the individuals who participate in it — prostitutes, pimps, and those who buy sexual services — to tell their own stories in their own words. Women, for example, explain why they become prostitutes and how they experience the daily sequence of "tricks." Men discuss why the become customers of prostitutes and what they get out of the experience. Pimps describe how they see themselves and the prostitutes upon whom they depend.
The authors have studied the prostitution market of Oslo for over ten years. Their research has involved extensive interviews with participants, observation of Oslo's prostitution district, personal interaction with prostitute women, and analysis of city police records. They conclude that prostitution is embedded in the gender relations of an economically stratified society and that those who experience prostitution over an extended period of time suffer deep emotional damage.


These are the reviews of the book Im going to read to better understand.And just these reviews sort of highlight my concern about these women and there emotional well being even if they dotn go to jail or prison thats why I am so hesitant to say """"Legalize it""""...Im wondering if they are better off in prison than livign the life selling her body for money out of desperation.i guess it woudl depend on the prison.

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Quote:
Originally Posted by DallasApple
So the "massses" have legal paid for sex availble...Like a Super Wal Mart..But a super Sex mart..????

That's just ridiculous, I mean do you see giant strip clubs with aisles and aisles of girls swinging around on poles? No, because there are only so many people interested in that stuff and too many men who would rather get it free.

Maybe thats what my problem is..3 years into my marriage my husband slept with a stripper.And he was in fact "getting it for free " at home..As a matter of fact he" got it "for free from me the night before he "got it" from her..He said it wasnt "for the sex"...

Blessings

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Im serial posting help me Im TRAPPPED!!! LOL!!...

In my "research" there is one country where its "legal" but the prostitute must be unwed as well as the patron...How do you "prove" you are not married????????

Because thats another overlooked casualty.If my husband chose(again) to buy sex or the "company" of a woman I would hope he got thrown in the slammer for it.If he wants to mess around I at least want him to have to go through a lot of trouble to "get it".

By the way Im not doggin on my husbband..He's older and wiser now..Faithful,remorseful and repentant.Plus I got him back by threatening to go work at a strip club and revenge cheating so he knows how it feels...(which I regret I treated him like that as well by the way)...

Blessings

Dallas

 

[PureX]

I agree that prostitution is a bad occupation for almost everybody who practices it. I just don't agree that criminalization helps.

Neither does legalization.

I would generally opt for freedom of choice in a legalization discussion, except that in this case I do not believe the choice is being made with a healthy conscious mind. Just as with children and mentally handicapped people, the victims of child sexual abuse who grow up to become prostitutes are not doing it as an informed choice. I think they're doing it as expression of the damage that's been done to them. And for me, that removes it from a freedom of choice issue.