Men and women. Friends or foes?

[Father Heathen]

I don't.
But my culture unfortunately does think that.
I am admitting my culture is very sexist and chauvinistic, and I would never take it as an example. Never.
But maybe...in the US, it's excessively the opposite. Too harsh on men, whenever they make mistakes.
Just that.
A middle way is the solution.

It's not just men. Women who cheat are frowned upon as well.

 

[Estro Felino]

Harassment can be unsolicited and unwelcomed sexual comments and advances. Most women consider it creepy, uncomfortable, disrespectful, etc.

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It depends on what a man says.
If a man just yells at a woman how beautiful she is, and then he walks on by, that can be flattering.
As far as I am concerned.

If a man stops the woman and harasses her...that's harassment.

 

[Father Heathen]

It depends on what a man says.
If a man just yells at a woman how beautiful she is, and then he walks on by, that can be flattering.
As far as I am concerned.

If a man stops the woman and harasses her...that's harassment.

Of course compliments that aren't sexual wouldn't be considered sexual harassment.

 

[Stevicus]

Of course. That's for sure.
I may suspect this woman is doing this not because of glamour and style, but probably because she identifies with a way of thinking that makes her feel comfortable and feminine.

I know some people who are nostalgic about the 1950s, although the couple in the video seem to take it to quite an extreme, even using 1950s era appliances.

The 1950s were a strange decade, both politically and culturally, although it also marks a period of the beginning of America's affluence and opulence. Prior to that, in the 1940s it was WW2, and in the 30s, it was the Depression - not really fun decades like the 50s. In the decades before the 30s, it was even worse, at least listening to how my grandparents told it. Sometimes, they'd jokingly embellish the whole "walking to school barefoot in the snow" shtick, but it was pretty clear that they went through some difficult times and hardships back then. It was even worse for women, minorities, and immigrants.

But the post-WW2 era was punctuated by a sense of hope and progress - not just economically and technologically, but also culturally and politically, as the civil rights movement also took off and support grew exponentially.

I entered this world in the 1960s, so from my standpoint, the 50s might as well have been some idyllic fantasy era, although the movies, TV shows, and music from that decade make it appear especially cheesy and extremely shallow. The 60s and 70s seemed more serious, deeper, and more culturally and politically meaningful than the decade which gave us "Leave it to Beaver" and "Splish Splash I Was Taking a Bath."

 

[SomeRandom]

Actually Diana's story shows that in Europe nobody has ever really blamed the Prince of Wales (now Charles III) for having a mistress, also because he was a victim of an arranged marriage.
Nobody has ever blamed Diana either...though...because she was a victim as well.

You clearly didn’t read the stories I did at the time lol
It depended on the paper, I suppose. Some were patting him on the back, some called him trash and without class. I think that was primarily after the kids were born though.
Him being in an arranged marriage probably bought him a bit of shielding though.

That said, after Diana died I remember there was a very big collective kind of “oh crap” moment. I remember the fury of the public against the tabloids for “killing Diana.” With maybe a twinge of guilt for contributing to that.
So the whole thing was kind of a massive trainwreck, in hindsight lol

 

[JustGeorge]

What I meant is: do men perceive women as enemies or friends?
do women perceive men as enemies or friends?

I think that in the US the culture tends to portray all men as dangerous and potential rapists.
And that accentuates the hatred and the distance between the two sexes.

In Europe...I have never heard of such a thing. Men are perceived as companions and complementary.

Again, it just depends on the man or woman.

I know a woman who is sometimes uncomfortable around strange men. I also know a man who's sometimes uncomfortable around strange women. But, that's all it is. Discomfort. Not hate. And in both of those examples, they do have some friends of the opposite gender, so were able to overcome that with people that proved to be safe.

Other than those two people, I can't think of any people that, unless for the purpose of dating, really consider whether someone's a man or woman at all.

I think you're watching too much TV.

 

[Estro Felino]

Again, it just depends on the man or woman.

I know a woman who is sometimes uncomfortable around strange men. I also know a man who's sometimes uncomfortable around strange women. But, that's all it is. Discomfort. Not hate. And in both of those examples, they do have some friends of the opposite gender, so were able to overcome that with people that proved to be safe.

Other than those two people, I can't think of any people that, unless for the purpose of dating, really consider whether someone's a man or woman at all.

I think you're watching too much TV.

Of course.
I am definitely influenced by TV and media which deform the reality about the US.

I posted this video to make a point.
We see a woman making the first movie with a man met some minutes earlier.

If it was the man making the first move with a girl met few minutes earlier...would it be accepted as well?
Or would that man be called creep, pervert, rapist...etc etc?

 

[JustGeorge]

Of course.
I am definitely influenced by TV and media which deform the reality about the US.

I posted this video to make a point.
We see a woman making the first movie with a man met some minutes earlier.

If it was the man making the first move with a girl met few minutes earlier...would it be accepted as well?
Or would that man be called creep, pervert, rapist...etc etc?

Men make first moves all the time.

I think the only time they're called creeps/pervs are if their comment is creepy/pervy.

Complimenting a woman they're interested in or asking for her number isn't usually considered creepy/pervy(unless they're under the influence, half exposed, etc). Making a blunt sexual proposition usually is.

As for your example in the movie clip, such behavior could be seen as sexy or predatory from either a man or woman, depending on the person and their response to it.

 

[Estro Felino]

As for your example in the movie clip, such behavior could be seen as sexy or predatory from either a man or woman, depending on the person and their response to it.

Exactly.
If he hadn't been interested, he wouldn't have accepted her invitation.
Heterosexual people also receive unwanted advances all the times...from gay people.

For instance, I would never want to receive an unwanted advance from a lesbian.
I would rather be harassed by an old man, honestly.

 

[JustGeorge]

Exactly.
If he hadn't been interested, he wouldn't have accepted her invitation.
Heterosexual people also receive unwanted advances all the times...by gay people.

For instance, I would never want to receive an unwanted advance from a lesbian.
I would rather be harassed by an old man, honestly.

In all honesty, other than the time I dyed my hair rainbow without thinking of what that represented, I've gotten very few advances from women. Much more from old men, and they were typically not very respectful.

Though one of the funniest pick up lines I got was from a woman. She very shyly approached me and said "Excuse me, ma'am. I understand you're straight, but I just want you to know you've got the best rack in the bar." I couldn't help but start laughing, thanked her, and we both moved on. She knew she wasn't getting anywhere with it. I've had some rather negative situations with old men who wanted to make comments but weren't as gracious about not having their attractions returned.

 

[Estro Felino]

In all honesty, other than the time I dyed my hair rainbow without thinking of what that represented, I've gotten very few advances from women. Much more from old men, and they were typically not very respectful.

Though one of the funniest pick up lines I got was from a woman. She very shyly approached me and said "Excuse me, ma'am. I understand you're straight, but I just want you to know you've got the best rack in the bar." I couldn't help but start laughing, thanked her, and we both moved on. She knew she wasn't getting anywhere with it. I've had some rather negative situations with old men who wanted to make comments but weren't as gracious about not having their attractions returned.

LoL...that was not that bad.

Although...in my country...women are very clingy. Really...both with men and women.
They want to express their affection by hugging friends.

 

[JustGeorge]

LoL...that was not that bad.

Although...in my country...women are very clingy. Really...both with men and women.
They want to express their affection by hugging friends.

Hugging and physical affection is pretty common with women here, too.

I don't like hugs and physical affection. That contributes to my unpopularity.

 

[Stevicus]

I also know a man who's sometimes uncomfortable around strange women.

For me, it's always been kind of the opposite. I'm generally comfortable around strange women, but less so around normal women. I guess it's because I'm kind of strange myself.

 

[JustGeorge]

For me, it's always been kind of the opposite. I'm generally comfortable around strange women, but less so around normal women. I guess it's because I'm kind of strange myself.

Yes, I too, find strange people of either gender easier to be around.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

I don't.
But my culture unfortunately does think that.
I am admitting my culture is very sexist and chauvinistic, and I would never take it as an example. Never.
But maybe...in the US, it's excessively the opposite. Too harsh on men, whenever they make mistakes.
Just that.
A middle way is the solution.

He cheated on his wife (not a crime, just a terrible thing to do) and then while under oath he lied about it (and lying under oath about anything is a crime).
He wasn't punished for having sex. It was everything else that surrounded it (power descrepency, marital infedelity, lying under oath).

 

[Shadow Wolf]

Yes, I too, find strange people of either gender easier to be around.

Normal people are dysfunctional and scary.

 

[Estro Felino]

He cheated on his wife (not a crime, just a terrible thing to do) and then while under oath he lied about it (and lying under oath about anything is a crime).
He wasn't punished for having sex. It was everything else that surrounded it (power descrepency, marital infedelity, lying under oath).

The issue was that Clinton was very cute and charming...
I think that a female intern could feel attracted to him and seduce him.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

The issue was that Clinton was very cute and charming...

That is not the issue. Not at all.

I think that a female intern can feel attracted to him and can seduce him.

Are you even paying attention or do you just want to keep making childish and naive statements?

 

[Estro Felino]

That is not the issue. Not at all.


Are you even paying attention or do you just want to keep making childish and naive statements?

I will be honest.
Nobody here believes Clinton deserved what he went through in 1998.

 

[Wu Wei]

What do you think?
Is there really a distance that make men and women less and less allies?

Depends on the day....