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Paying rent to your parents

ChristineM

"Be strong", I whispered to my coffee.
Premium Member
Of course!
You don't think I'd be the one earning money.

Actually you are right, i would never think you were the one earning the money. @Wu Wei works enough to keep you in the manner to which you have become accustomed.

I was under the mistaken impression that Madam R was also a lady of leisure
 
No. She can't take you out of this world.



Family can be crappy sometimes. Sadly.



That is a weird rule in itself if taken to an extreme.

Sometimes an *** whooping makes you think they can :)

Why have you said the rule is a weird one? It is like t o me, you don't give and not get back yours or else you become a doormat
 

Polymath257

Think & Care
Staff member
Premium Member
As a brazilian, one thing I find reallllly weird about American culture is the concept of paying rent to your parents once you hit 18 years old. How commonplace is this?

Does anybody else also find this weird?

Of course one should help paying the bills, but literally paying a monthly rent to keep living with your parents is completely alien to brazilian culture.

Once a child is 18, they are an adult and should be responsible for themselves. They should have a job and contribute to the household they are in. That can either take the form of rent or regular contributions to groceries and other expenses. As adults, they should be contributing their share.
 

Polymath257

Think & Care
Staff member
Premium Member
Oh, sure. I was thinking more on terms of the parents demanding rent when I created the OP, rather than the children deciding by themselves they want to contribute with money directly.

if they don't want to contribute, they should move out. Rent is a good way to ensure contributions.
 

Polymath257

Think & Care
Staff member
Premium Member
Paying rent to keep living there is weird to me, but parents taking some of their money as long as they are there is fine to me. I just don't think one should kick them out if they don't unless you genuinely can not afford them. Giving them money and otherwise supporting them throughout your life is just a moral obligation to me.

I strongly disagree with that. Once they are adults, they are responsible for themselves.
 

Lain

Well-Known Member
I strongly disagree with that. Once they are adults, they are responsible for themselves.

Why do you think so? I would only kick a child out for extremely few reasons (extreme misdeeds), and other than that they would be welcome to stay as long as they will.
 

Vinayaka

devotee
Premium Member
When you ask for rent, you are asking someone to pay for using your property. It is a contractual relationship.

If you were to ask your children to pay some bills, you would be merely asking them to contribute towards the household.
There was no contract with the kids. It was all informal. It's the same thing, from my POV. But you're free to disagree. I called it rent, but really it was 'rent'. The only thing 'rent' about it was that they paid once a month at the beginning of the month. Money comes money goes, doesn't matter what you call it. But with that, I'm out. It's not such an important issue that it's reason for debate. The fact is every household on this planet varies, and even moreso between countries.
 

mangalavara

नमस्कार
Premium Member
Does anybody else also find this weird?

I'm an American who finds it weird. When I was close to turning 18, the number when one is magically an adult, I talked with my parents about paying them rent. They were opposed to it because (1) they already have their income and I should be able to accumulate wealth, and (2) I am their son, not a tenant. Today, when I give my father some money because I feel it's owed to him, my mother pays me back.
 

Revoltingest

Pragmatic Libertarian
Premium Member
Actually you are right, i would never think you were the one earning the money. @Wu Wei works enough to keep you in the manner to which you have become accustomed.

I was under the mistaken impression that Madam R was also a lady of leisure
She doesn't do "leisure".
That's my job.
It's how we apportion chores.
 

Polymath257

Think & Care
Staff member
Premium Member
Why do you think so? I would only kick a child out for extremely few reasons (extreme misdeeds), and other than that they would be welcome to stay as long as they will.

I think it serves the child ill to not require that they grow up and take responsibility for themselves. If they don't have a job and are not contributing, the length of time they are welcome to crash at my place is going to be limited. I make allowances for emergencies, but that is time limited and they better deal with their issues in a timely manner.
 

74x12

Well-Known Member
As a brazilian, one thing I find reallllly weird about American culture is the concept of paying rent to your parents once you hit 18 years old. How commonplace is this?

Does anybody else also find this weird?

Of course one should help paying the bills, but literally paying a monthly rent to keep living with your parents is completely alien to brazilian culture.
It's because in American culture we have the idea that once you hit 18 you should stand on your own feet and take care of yourself. That's why parents charge rent. Because they really wish their kids would learn to be less dependent for their own sake. Unfortunately rising rent prices/higher payments for buying a new house means that more people are stuck living with their parents than ever. Decades ago people could more easily afford to live on their own. But now we are being forced to embrace a culture more similar to other countries where people live as large family units their whole lives. But we aren't used to that.

The reason is that many environmentalists etc. don't want more infrastructure or houses. They don't want people to exist at all; much less spreading out. They want us all stacked up in the same areas. They look at humans as a virus/cancer that needs to be contained. They want us to die. They want animals to live more freely with open areas to explore while people are cooped up and only the rich elitists get to enjoy the outdoors.
 

Koldo

Outstanding Member
Once a child is 18, they are an adult and should be responsible for themselves. They should have a job and contribute to the household they are in.

I have a slight disagreement here: If you are studying, e.g. college, you should be exempt from contributing financially.

That can either take the form of rent or regular contributions to groceries and other expenses. As adults, they should be contributing their share.

I just find the whole concept of paying rent weird on these cases. It is as if your child was no longer your child but rather a stranger you are making business with.
 
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