I'm going to get into trouble with this.
Years ago (the 1980s) I came over to the USA from England to work on a contract. At the time, the PC thing in England was that "black" should not be used to refer to, well, negroes (I thought for some time what word to use there). The correct term was "colored" (yeah yeah, coloured) we were told, and I dutifully dropped "black" in favor of "colored". The first time I used the word over here (I now live in the USA) it was greeted with shock. "You shouldn't say that, it should be 'black'". OK, I thought "black" it is. Since then I have tried to be good and used "African American*" and so on.
I guess I've become old and grumpy, but I get more and more fed up with being told what words, in my native language, I am allowed or not allowed to use. I get it that people get offended and I don't want to do that, but isn't there some onus on the offended person to consider whether the speaker intends to be offensive? Is it unreasonable for me to ask that people should make up their minds what words I am allowed to use and stick to it?
Here's a good reason not to be so easily offended. Lots of people, myself included, really try to remove all traces of racism from their thoughts and actions. They also, and this is where the problem usually arises, try to express support for oppressed groups of people, only to be rejected because they don't use the "correct" word. Can you see how these well meaning people can be put off and just give up on the whole thing?
OK, flame away.
* I think it was Bush the younger that said (in South Africa) "Nelson Mandela is the first African American President of South Africa". OK, very funny, but think for a minute. What was he supposed to say? "African American" was the PC way to say it at the time in the USA. He couldn't use any other words and still be PC. But it doesn't make sense outside the USA.