People vilifying and disparaging each other across religious and political divide:. Learning not to do it myself, not giving any attention to other people when they’re doing it, and giving friendly attention to people when they are targets of it.
This is hard not to do sometimes, for most people, including myself. The more strongly I feel about an issue the more difficult it can be. We are in tribes often and are emotionally attached to ideas, as much as intellectually, at least in the spheres of politics and religion.
Long term psychological damage to people sometimes from popular stereotypes and prejudices about groups and categories of people: Spending time with some of the people whose ideas ideas and interests are most opposed to mine, trying to see things their way and see the good in what they’re doing.
Yes we should address the words of the individual and not make presumptions. Stereotyping is a quick and easy way for our minds to assess others, sometimes that short-cutting turns out right, sometimes not. Walk a mile in another persons shoes is a good idea. You've got a new pair of shoes and a mile head start.
Behavior that stirs up emotional turmoil: Learning not to respond to some kinds of posts and not to respond to some people. Not pisting until I can do it with genuinely friendly feelings. Learning to respond to some behavior that infuriates me by discussing the issues it raises for me, without pointing fingers.
This is a great strategy if you can employ it. Good for the blood pressure. It's a judgment call between responding to something you think is important that should not go unchallenged and deciding you'd be flogging a dead horse. Sometimes you have to not bite the hook.
People persistently misrepresenting what a person is trying to say or diverting attention from it: After a series of posts like that, posting an update on the topic of discussion and what’s been said.
Personally I think in that scenario I'd just bail. Maybe you're more optimistic!
Putting a lot of time and effort into a discussion with someone. and then finding out that what it was really about for them was not at all what I thought it was: Learning not to put in a lot of time and effort until I see where the discussion is going.
That is discouraging but I'm sure we've all experienced it. Best not to speculate on the intentions of other posters, I suppose.
Thank you for sharing these ideas (again!)
