Should Spanking Your Children Be Illegal?

[Shadow Wolf]

I do not see why spanking should be illegal. I think the problem is alot of people automatically think it is abusive.
I think it varies from child to child on which method of punishment will work, and the situation. For some, an isolated time out will work just fine, but for other's, sometimes a spank is necessary.

 

[methylatedghosts]

The same thing that any form of punishment does: Don't do that.

But the one point I keep coming back to:

Child hits someone
Parent hits child while saying "don't hit"



And it doesn't necessarily have to go like that for it to be hypocritical. Soon enough the child will see the hypocrisy in trying to teach no hitting, and then "spanking" for every other misdemeanor.

It makes no sense what so ever!

I think to "spank" is weak on the part of the parent, no matter how frustrated or angry you may be. That goes for everyone. In my eyes it is weak to hit instead of being the adult and punishing without violence. There are other ways to punish or discipline and these include using "naughty seats" or for older kids, taking away privileges. That's how it is done in our justice system! You break the rules, your privileges are removed i.e. you go to jail. To be so backwards in the home and hitting children for misbehaving is ridiculous. This is the ONE point I stand strongest on when I raise my future children. Violence should not be used to punish. Parents are supposed to be role models.

 

[fullyveiled muslimah]

I do not see why spanking should be illegal. I think the problem is alot of people automatically think it is abusive.
I think it varies from child to child on which method of punishment will work, and the situation. For some, an isolated time out will work just fine, but for other's, sometimes a spank is necessary.

Frubals for that. I hate it in discussions like these a spanking is automatically tying the kid up in the basement in the dark with a barbed wire. Goodness it's just a spanking. Plus no study of any scientist whatsoever is gonna make me deny my personal experience. I was spanked, I didn't die, I wasn't traumatized by it, I don't have deep seated issues with violence, I didn't become a violent criminal...none of it. A spanking is not abuse.


It being made illegal is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. It intrudes upon my right to raise my children as I see fit. if my kid is the type of kid that a good talking to will do the trick, all the better. If they need an attention getter, so be it. I'm not gonna kill 'em. They'll be alright.

I remember I was at the mall a while back. This lady had her two kids with her, the oldest looked about 9 or 10. Apparently she couldn't or wouldn't get him some kind of toy he wanted, so he went on a little rampage. He cursed her out, called her all kinds of B's and H's. Told her he hated her that she couldn't get the toy. All the while she was so embarrased. She couldn't get him under control at all. That boy hauled off and spit in her face. Oh boy oh boy, if I had done that I wouldn't be here today to talk to ya'll. The whole time I'm thinking, give me five minutes with the boy. He finally calmed down, and shut up. She just put her head down, and shuffled out of the mall with her kids. That whole scene was ridiculous. I could tell by the looks of it that whatever she was doing as far as discipline was NOT working. She needed to try something else.

 

[methylatedghosts]

I remember I was at the mall a while back. This lady had her two kids with her, the oldest looked about 9 or 10. Apparently she couldn't or wouldn't get him some kind of toy he wanted, so he went on a little rampage. He cursed her out, called her all kinds of B's and H's. Told her he hated her that she couldn't get the toy. All the while she was so embarrased. She couldn't get him under control at all. That boy hauled off and spit in her face. Oh boy oh boy, if I had done that I wouldn't be here today to talk to ya'll. The whole time I'm thinking, give me five minutes with the boy. He finally calmed down, and shut up. She just put her head down, and shuffled out of the mall with her kids. That whole scene was ridiculous. I could tell by the looks of it that whatever she was doing as far as discipline was NOT working. She needed to try something else.

But you don't need to hit to discipline that behaviour! The child obviously is used to getting his way and running the show

 

[Mr. Peanut]

Now they are trying to pass a law that if parents give their children more than one piece of candy a day, and more than one visit to McDonald's a month, and cannot prove they are getting 3 square meals including fruits, veggies, and dairy, etc., they should be arrested for abuse.

 

[Engyo]

It's legislating to the 2%.

98% of folks don't have problems with this, but then there are the other 2% (or whatever the actual percentage might be). Think of the little girl who at 2 couldn't remember all of her father's instructions, and ended up dead because the parents' discipline plan got out of control.

Mother's lawyer: Child killed for failing to say 'please' - CNN.com

Laws such as the one in the OP are aimed at people like these parents, not the 98% of people who can figure it out.

 

[Mister_T]

Child hits someone
Parent hits child while saying "don't hit"

Parents who also tell their children not to curse, use curse words.I think people are assuming that whatever is permissable for an adult is permissable for children, and it's not.

One thing my parents made very clear when I was a kid was "do as I say, not as I do." We see this type of "hypocrisy" in our everyday lives (Policemen are a good example). That's the philosphy I'm seeing here.

And it doesn't necessarily have to go like that for it to be hypocritical. Soon enough the child will see the hypocrisy in trying to teach no hitting, and then "spanking" for every other misdemeanor.

Somehow, I don't think children are busy contemplating the "hypocrisies" of the world.

I think to "spank" is weak on the part of the parent, no matter how frustrated or angry you may be

I think to outlaw spanking is being overly pollitically correct and is absolutely ridiculous. And I think you should reread the posts from people who actually have children and spank their kids.....you'll see that for most people, it's not done out of anger.

 

[Mister_T]

It's legislating to the 2%.

98% of folks don't have problems with this, but then there are the other 2% (or whatever the actual percentage might be). Think of the little girl who at 2 couldn't remember all of her father's instructions, and ended up dead because the parents' discipline plan got out of control.

Mother's lawyer: Child killed for failing to say 'please' - CNN.com

Laws such as the one in the OP are aimed at people like these parents, not the 98% of people who can figure it out.

So because a handful of people are horrible parents, we should impose ridiculous laws on everyone else?

 

[Mr. Peanut]

Hi!

I would only say, guard your freedom, friends!

Cheers!

 

[Engyo]

So because a handful of people are horrible parents, we should impose ridiculous laws on everyone else?

I never said I agreed with it, just that I understand the impetus. In any event, I doubt seriously that any such legislation can be successful - the people who the legislation might actually constrain aren't going to do something like this to begin with, and the 2% won't pay any attention to the legislation.

 

[Shadow Wolf]

But it is a violent act. Hitting someone is considered violent no matter what the reasons or circumstances.

I am wondering Panda, have you your own kids or any nieces and/or nephews?
I have 9 nieces and nephews, and have seen several discipline methods work. One of my nephews just a quick swat on the wrist so he can feel it is enough for him to know he done something he shouldn't have. Another nephew of mine is grounded to his room until the end of this school semester (and has been since last month) for having a very foul mouth and only 9 years old. One of my nieces, a firm verbal scolding has done sufficient.

 

[Quiddity]

Yes that is very true but I don't think it would be hard for a person in this situation to restate both halves of their case so that they no longer conflicted. Whilst a person might state their arguments in such an inconsistent way, it is probably more likely due to their failure to communicate well than a deep seated contradiction in their worldview.

Possibly...or all they really have to go with for an argument is "it doesn't hurt anybody". Hurt seems to be the center of many arguments and although I agree that shouldn't be aimed or seeked, it need not always be a bad thing. How many times have you been hurt only for it create a change in you? Or to cause you to see things differently? The possibilities are endless and I do think there is a healthy way to discipline kids.

 

[Quiddity]

But the one point I keep coming back to:

Child hits someone
Parent hits child while saying "don't hit"



And it doesn't necessarily have to go like that for it to be hypocritical. Soon enough the child will see the hypocrisy in trying to teach no hitting, and then "spanking" for every other misdemeanor.

It makes no sense what so ever!

I think to "spank" is weak on the part of the parent, no matter how frustrated or angry you may be. That goes for everyone. In my eyes it is weak to hit instead of being the adult and punishing without violence. There are other ways to punish or discipline and these include using "naughty seats" or for older kids, taking away privileges. That's how it is done in our justice system! You break the rules, your privileges are removed i.e. you go to jail. To be so backwards in the home and hitting children for misbehaving is ridiculous. This is the ONE point I stand strongest on when I raise my future children. Violence should not be used to punish. Parents are supposed to be role models.

I think it's weak to call spanking violence. Try looking up "spanking" under injury? Tell me if you find it. It can't even be categorized as an injury let alone violence.

Can some parents get out of hand? Of course. But you don't outlaw something for the mistakes of a few.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I was spanked! Come on people! I am fine. Or am i?

 

[Pardus]

Parenting courses should be part of the standard school curriculum.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

I don't think so. Its like asking them to have a baby while they are 16.

 

[Panda]

I am wondering Panda, have you your own kids or any nieces and/or nephews?
I have 9 nieces and nephews, and have seen several discipline methods work. One of my nephews just a quick swat on the wrist so he can feel it is enough for him to know he done something he shouldn't have. Another nephew of mine is grounded to his room until the end of this school semester (and has been since last month) for having a very foul mouth and only 9 years old. One of my nieces, a firm verbal scolding has done sufficient.

My mum is a child minder, I am surrounded by small children from 8am to 6pm any time I am home. She can easily control them without using violence, even the one that is a little brat.

This may sound cruel. I think if parents need to resort to spanking to teach their children then they are weak parents and do not know how to handle children properly.

 

[Don Penguinoini]

My parents are not weak. I was spanked. My parents are not weak. I have become better due to this.

 

[Pardus]

I don't think so. Its like asking them to have a baby while they are 16.

:banghead3

 

[Mister_T]

I don't think so. Its like asking them to have a baby while they are 16.

Actually, I would think it teaches them how to be responsible parents when they get older.

Much like everthing else you learn in school, it is meant to be used through out your whole life, not just for the moment.