The last post is the WINNER!

[Revoltingest]

So Vinny ran off with the pot
cuz he saved his pennies & bought
it in Colorado.
Then he got blotto
and lost to this elderly Scot!

Note: It is no coincidence that Colorado rhymes with blotto.

 

[Vinayaka]

The elderly Scot did a dance,
When his kilt took the place of his pants,
No winner he was,
That's just because
Vinny didn't give him a chance!

 

[sun rise]

Vinny and the Scott danced a pas de deux.
To see this many lined up in a queue.
Sunrise took off
with a warning cough
because he knew all would say phew.

 

[Revoltingest]

That northerner done stole me kilt!
(He fancies the way that I'm built.)
But win here he shan't
and also he can't
compete with the way that I lilt!

 

[ShivaFan]

Kazi praised the curry squash
With a ghazal from the past
Then rushed out of his little hut
His hot pie killed the grass
The little ants complained no end
to the Lord of Kazi's curries
"His Maqta killed all my eggs!
Set fire to the Faeries!
His gasses blinded my eye!
His takhallus scorched my bride!
And the steam from his hot pie
Even killed the bird in flight!
Destroy this son of hot dung!
Before he lays another pie!
Send a drone upon his hut!
Or the entire world will die!"
So even the Lord agreed
The penalty is death
And sent a bolt of lightning
Straight through his balding head

 

[sun rise]

ShivaFan's a righteous dude
who brings poetic food.
But Sunrise wants dosa
and several samosa
so ShivaFan's offerings get booed.

 

[sun rise]

This is the end of the Yuga Kali
when Mother spreads wide her folly.
Sunrise looks for Yuga Sat
There's nothing strange in that.
He dances to tunes from Wood Bolly.

 

[Vinayaka]

It's morning, and not to be rude,
It's so good to hear about delicious food,
But the bacon nation
May need explanation,
A dosa is flat lentil pancake, oh dude.

 

[Revoltingest]

A birthday ode.....

She's hotter than Dawn Wells or Tina.
Her suitors could fill an arena.
She's now twenty one
and legal for fun.
To our very own....Willamena!

 

[Brickjectivity]

What?! Willamena is my mom
if you are shocked please remain calm
but she ain't twenty
and has shoes plenty
don't get me wrong she is da bomb

 

[Wu Wei]

Not the winner yet
later you will see
on this you can bet
very soon I will be

 

[Vinayaka]

There once was a lady from the cold north land,
Unlike others, her head wasn't stuck in the sand,
She passed another year,
Told all who would hear,
"I'm here to befriend, now isn't that grand?"

 

[Wu Wei]

Give it up
Go away
You can't win
I'm here to stay

 

[Revoltingest]

The funkiest most awful smell
is sharing a small diving bell
with Wu Wei, my foe,
who minutes ago
"announced" that he had Taco Bell.

 

[Wu Wei]

Revolingest is Revoliting
foul smelling fetid and molting
Revolingest is Weepy
disgusting abominable and creepy
Revolingest is Repulsive
and his stench will leaves you convulsive

 

[Revoltingest]

Wu bought a commercial grade juicer
and became a big smoothie producer.
It improved his well-being
but he now finds he's peeing
much more, & his stools are now looser.

 

[Vinayaka]

Revoltingest is not really insane,
But he's verily good at the feign
So if you truly want nuts,
No if, and, or buts,
Wu Wei's is the one with no brain.

 

[Revoltingest]

There was a Canuck of great mass,
who stood in surf up to his knees.
It doesn't yet rhyme,
but will, given time.
The tide will hit Vin pretty fast.

 

[Vinayaka]

You're no poet, and you just did show it,
You're some faker, and we all know it!
Some rhyme that was!
Didya kiss your Cuz?
Close that mouth, and shut we'll sew it.

 

[Revoltingest]

To not rhyme, & do it well is even harder.
Consider me ode to Bill McGonegall, the worst poet in history.
(It's very tough to do intentionally what he does naturally.)

I'll read you some poetry that's both pompous & abominable,
which will cause you much pain, both aesthetic & abdominal,
with meter inconsistent
& rhymes barely approximate
in tribute to a poet born in Dundee Scotland in 1825 or 1830 named William Topaz McGonagall.

It took me a while to write something of which I'm so profoundly ashamed.