This thread is so gay

[Alceste]

And, as I've said before, it's not about offense. That truly is the least of my concerns. I'm concerned about hurting the gay community and their cause; about making a gay person feel less safe; about perpetuating the connection between gayness and undesirableness. Those are the reasons why I don't think this phrase should be used. Offense has little to do with it.

I've written letters to the government expressing my views on the applicability of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms to marriage rights for homosexuals (a successful campaign in Canada, FYI). I would never consider voting for a political candidate who did not explicitly endorse equal rights for homosexuals. I maintain close, intimate, non-judgmental friendships with both male and female homosexuals. I openly, strongly reject bigotry against homosexuals and do my best to correct misperceptions about homosexuality wherever I encounter such things, including my own family and unenlightened heterosexual friends.

And you think that, despite all of the above, by occasionally using the word "gay" in jest I am harming the cause of homosexual equality? Seriously?

I'm offended. :sarcastic

 

[Falvlun]

I've written letters to the government expressing my views on the applicability of the Charter of Rights and Freedoms to marriage rights for homosexuals (a successful campaign in Canada, FYI). I would never consider voting for a political candidate who did not explicitly endorse equal rights for homosexuals. I maintain close, intimate, non-judgmental friendships with both male and female homosexuals. I openly, strongly reject bigotry against homosexuals and do my best to correct misperceptions about homosexuality wherever I encounter such things, including my own family and unenlightened heterosexual friends.

And you think that, despite all of the above, by occasionally using the word "gay" in jest I am harming the cause of homosexual equality? Seriously?

I'm offended. :sarcastic

Because you do many admirable things doesn't mean you get to do something wrong and say it's just fine.

And I really don't think there's anything funny about using the word gay to mean uncool, undesirable, etc.

It's one thing when you're joking with your gay friends about being gay; I get that. It's good not to take yourself too seriously. It's another thing to look at something you don't like, or think is uncool, and designate that thing as "gay".

 

[Magic Man]

Because you do many admirable things doesn't mean you get to do something wrong and say it's just fine.

And I really don't think there's anything funny about using the word gay to mean uncool, undesirable, etc.

It's one thing when you're joking with your gay friends about being gay; I get that. It's good not to take yourself too seriously. It's another thing to look at something you don't like, or think is uncool, and designate that thing as "gay".

The point is we understand the disconnect. We don't view being gay as bad, and so we can understand how others can use the term this way and not see being gay as bad.

 

[Revoltingest]

Because you do many admirable things doesn't mean you get to do something wrong and say it's just fine.
And I really don't think there's anything funny about using the word gay to mean uncool, undesirable, etc.
It's one thing when you're joking with your gay friends about being gay; I get that. It's good not to take yourself too seriously. It's another thing to look at something you don't like, or think is uncool, and designate that thing as "gay".

It seems people need some thicker skins & a broader perspective. Language is always changing with culture. No one is in charge,
& there are no enforceable rules. There is no right or wrong, only what happens & how people react. It's a stochastic process resulting
from many people acting individually. Some will embrace changes, while others will bristle at them. I don't begrudge those who are
offended by the "so gay" phrase, & neither do I demonize those who use it. We should note that while Smoke was very offended by
this thread, even he is not above using insulting phrases against other groups. Tis all a matter of whose ox is being gored. It will always
be this way.

Btw, ain't none of us poifect. But the ones who really cheese me off are the guys who are in the business of making political hay by taking offense.

 

[Alceste]

Because you do many admirable things doesn't mean you get to do something wrong and say it's just fine.

And I really don't think there's anything funny about using the word gay to mean uncool, undesirable, etc.

It's one thing when you're joking with your gay friends about being gay; I get that. It's good not to take yourself too seriously. It's another thing to look at something you don't like, or think is uncool, and designate that thing as "gay".

Then, since the question was "Is it always wrong to use the word gay as an insult or as a joke?" your answer, in light of the above, is "no". Correct?

Mine too. So we don't disagree at all.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

This thread is so white.

 

[DallasApple]

I think ya'll are all a bunch of wet backs...!!!!!!

Love



Dallas

 

[monta]

I think ya'll are all a bunch of wet backs...!!!!!!

Love



Dallas

What are wet backs

 

[Revoltingest]

What are wet backs

It's a condition that illegal immigrants get when they swim from Mexico across the Rio Grande to the US.

 

[Just_me_Mike]

Mball has consistently used the excuse "I only say it around my friends".
If you used the N word just around your friends, cause "they know" you like black people, doesn't justify. It only solidifies bigotry.

You have repeatedly replied "to you it may seem that way, but to me and my friends it doesn't"

To that I say, one your lucky your friends haven't realized their being insulted, and two no matter what you say here, you sound like a child saying, "I know you are but what am I".

Actually this thread has exposed you for what you are. And I find it disgusting, and I'll take a warning or banning from the RF in order to tell you that.
I have been called out on the RF for using the word Jew ignorantly, and I changed. I saw my error and I hope you do too one day.

You have a million reasons why you are right here, yet refuse to see you are trying to stand on a mountain made from marbles, and every time you stand on the top and declare the things you declare about your position, you sink right back to the bottom. It is because you can not stand on a mountain of marbles no matter how skilled you think you are.

 

[Dezzie]

I find it difficult to answer your poll because your original question was:
Is it always wrong to use the word gay as an insult or as a joke?

An insult and a joke two completely different things.

 

[Magic Man]

Mball has consistently used the excuse "I only say it around my friends".
If you used the N word just around your friends, cause "they know" you like black people, doesn't justify. It only solidifies bigotry.

You have repeatedly replied "to you it may seem that way, but to me and my friends it doesn't"

To that I say, one your lucky your friends haven't realized their being insulted, and two no matter what you say here, you sound like a child saying, "I know you are but what am I".

Actually this thread has exposed you for what you are. And I find it disgusting, and I'll take a warning or banning from the RF in order to tell you that.
I have been called out on the RF for using the word Jew ignorantly, and I changed. I saw my error and I hope you do too one day.

You have a million reasons why you are right here, yet refuse to see you are trying to stand on a mountain made from marbles, and every time you stand on the top and declare the things you declare about your position, you sink right back to the bottom. It is because you can not stand on a mountain of marbles no matter how skilled you think you are.

Wow...I see you got quite an inaccurate impression here. The fact is there's nothing wrong with using "gay" in a joking way with other people who understand that it doesn't imply that being gay is bad. You seem to have blown things way out of proportion.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

It's pretty gay that this thread is still going.

 

[Just_me_Mike]

Mball
So then answer the question posed several times throughout this thread.
What does it mean for something "to be so gay".

That needs clarifying if you wouldn't mind...

 

[Magic Man]

Mball
So then answer the question posed several times throughout this thread.
What does it mean for something "to be so gay".

That needs clarifying if you wouldn't mind...

It's hard to define. I'm guessing you already understand the meaning of it when it's used. It's a pejorative similar to saying something is stupid.

 

[Just_me_Mike]

It's hard to define. I'm guessing you already understand the meaning of it when it's used. It's a pejorative similar to saying something is stupid.

Ok, you need say no more. My initial post is firm in its position.

However, I will say that your standing up for what you believe is admirable, most people like you would hide those feelings and cower.

 

[Magic Man]

Ok, you need say no more. My initial post is firm in its position.

However, I will say that your standing up for what you believe is admirable, most people like you would hide those feelings and cower.

There's no reason to hide or cower. I'm doing nothing wrong. My use of that phrase is not perpetuating homophobia or the idea that being gay is bad or wrong. Please, if you're going to post, post something useful.

 

[Just_me_Mike]

There's no reason to hide or cower. I'm doing nothing wrong. My use of that phrase is not perpetuating homophobia or the idea that being gay is bad or wrong. Please, if you're going to post, post something useful.

What would be useful is to try for just a few minutes and think about why Smoke left, or what 9/10 penguin was saying.
I have not seen for one second you stop and say "guys, maybe I'm missing something here", and instead just stonewall anybody who has questioned your self viewed innocent stance.
That would be useful...

 

[Magic Man]

What would be useful is to try for just a few minutes and think about why Smoke left, or what 9/10 penguin was saying.
I have not seen for one second you stop and say "guys, maybe I'm missing something here", and instead just stonewall anybody who has questioned your self viewed innocent stance.
That would be useful...

What would be useful is to not fly off the handle and blow everything out of proportion. What would be useful is to approach the issue more rationally.

There is nothing I'm missing. Some people think that the use of the word "gay" in this way hinders acceptance of the LGBT community and promotes homophobia. It's a valid concern. However, since I generally only use it around people who already accept the LGBT community, that's not a concern. Also, when you consider how much acceptance of homosexuality has grown over the past 10-15 years, and the fact that in that same time the use of this phrase has proliferated, it only makes sense that that phrase is not having a negative impact on the acceptance of homosexuality.

 

[Just_me_Mike]

What would be useful is to not fly off the handle and blow everything out of proportion. What would be useful is to approach the issue more rationally.

There is nothing I'm missing. Some people think that the use of the word "gay" in this way hinders acceptance of the LGBT community and promotes homophobia. It's a valid concern. However, since I generally only use it around people who already accept the LGBT community, that's not a concern. Also, when you consider how much acceptance of homosexuality has grown over the past 10-15 years, and the fact that in that same time the use of this phrase has proliferated, it only makes sense that that phrase is not having a negative impact on the acceptance of homosexuality.

I have a dear friend for years who hung in his living room a Rebel Flag, and his roomate was black as well. When I discovered this interesting scenario, I thought it was a bit unique.

I asked my friend about it, and he said to him it didn't mean anything bad, but he was just proud of his heritage, and didn't mean to offend anyone.
As noble as his intentions were, he soon took it down and I have never seen it again. Our conversation was short and didn't go beyond what I just said, but clearly he came to the conclusion something might be out of place for his black roommate.

This is very similar to what I am seeing in this thread. It will take something other than this thread to set you right, but hopefully you'll get it one day. Until then, all us ignorant people on this side of the fence will just leave you be with your innocent playful use of the word Gay.