I haven't yet made a judgment either way, since you said you "truly sought" and I was curious what you meant--I mean, to be fair, we both know people who seek God in multiple different ways.
Assuming you are serious, a safe assumption I think (and again I am sorry I jumped on your case), I suppose I could expound a bit.
I grew up in Assemblys Of God brand. From the day I was born, I was taken to church, and taught the bible. I literally grew up reading it for myself, once I learned how (to read).
There was a point I could quote the Gospel of John, verse-by-verse.... of course, by that time, I was using Good News For Modern Man, and that was not on the Officially Approved Bible List™, and I experienced some of the first "in house" persecution by my fellow Christians...
... I got that a lot, growing up, as I was a curios kid, and would often see a Conundrum with a particular Bible Story, and ask my "teacher" about it. I was always dismissed; my questions belittled, and not uncommon, told to spend the rest of Sunday School in the hall, "thinking about what you just said".
I quickly learned that Asking Questions was Forbidden. But I didn't stop, I simply quit asking
stupid people. And indeed, as I grew older and older, I began to realize that "God's Leaders" were often mind-numbingly stupid.
Indeed-- I still remember to this day, a Sermon from the Head Preacher (who ruled his church with an iron fist) that described an Astronomical Phenomena that was going to take place in the 1980s. (this would have been the very early 70s, or perhaps the late 60s-- I remember the sermon, but I don't recall the exact date, other than it was on a Sunday Main Worship). As the preacher waxed lyrical about the Impending Doom? It hit me-- he had absolutely no freaking CLUE what he was going on about! He was clueless how fricking huge the Solar System was. He had zero knowledge of how gravity works by Inverse Square-- and that the gravitational pull of a car had 1000 times the pull on his person, as the gravitational pull of, say, Saturn, and that when an Astronomer says "lined up" it's not the same thing as a dance hall coreorgrapher telling his dancers to line up...
That was such a Moment Of Realization for me-- the preacher was literally spewing
lies direct from the pulpit, and god was doing damn-all to stop him-- not so much as a mild headache.... (well, *I* got one, due to the incredible level of BS coming down from that sermon-- he was preaching as if the "planetary alignment" would be causing Global Catastrophe from .... the combined pull of
gravity on earth...! Now, I doubt he knew he was lying, as he was (I realized) dumber than a box of hammers, when it came to anything science-related... It was amazing he could operate a car safely...) (Yes, the planets did "line up" in the 1980s, but not like a line of bowling pins, as he preached...)
That was one of many examples that seemed to thwart my attempts to be a Good Christian, and Follow Jesus. I gave it my all-- I went to all the right camps. I prayed all the time (for a little kid, that is--still).
I had faith enough to move not only
a mountain, but an entire chain....... !
But. Gradually, over a Life Time Of Me Searching? I began to realize: there simply was nobody else Out There--- and I could only wish I could have become comfortably numb to it all...
Time and time again, God let me, my family, and my friends
down. Over and over. If you hit even the most stubborn, the most faithful, on the head with a Two By Four, they either Get The Message, or they become permanently brain damaged...
God simply was not there-- likely he never was; the scant few times I had thought god was there? Were easily explained as happenstance, or worse-- my wishful thoughts...
I was in my 40's before I came to realize that it was all a giant load of dingo's kidneys.
But yeah-- I tried to find god well into my 40s. The failure wasn't on my end. You cannot talk to that which simply isn't there in the first place. I rang and rang that phone-- nobody picked up. Ever.
Call me stubborn, that it took me that long-- but I had to be sure...