Why is it Important to Love Who You Sleep With?

[Falvlun]

Oh. This thread is about sex. And here I thought you were literally referring to "sleep".

Hehe. Is there this new craze of just sleeping with people, no monkey business involved?

 

[Alceste]

If I had to choose between sleeping with someone I loved and someone I didn't, I'd pick the one who was better in bed.

 

[DallasApple]

If I had to choose between sleeping with someone I loved and someone I didn't, I'd pick the one who was better in bed.

But wouldnt you love the one who was better in bed ?

Love

Dallas

 

[Autodidact]

if i had to choose between sleeping with someone i loved and someone i didn't, i'd pick the one who was better in bed.

srsly?

 

[Alceste]

But wouldnt you love the one who was better in bed ?

Love

Dallas

Not necessarily, IME.

 

[Alceste]

srsly?

Well yeah. This is of course assuming sex is the only consideration and there would be no hard feelings for the "loved" person. I'm thinking of the times I've been single, but dating a couple people, and had to go "Hm - I'm a little randy, who should I call?" Not the times I'm in a committed, "official" relationship with someone I love - it's not like I have a big list of contenders these days to choose from, and I'm always going "Hmmmm - who shall it be tonight, Wampus or that relentless, angry Irish drunk from a few years back?"

 

[DallasApple]

Well yeah. This is of course assuming sex is the only consideration and there would be no hard feelings for the "loved" person. I'm thinking of the times I've been single, but dating a couple people, and had to go "Hm - I'm a little randy, who should I call?" Not the times I'm in a committed, "official" relationship with someone I love - it's not like I have a big list of contenders these days to choose from, and I'm always going "Hmmmm - who shall it be tonight, Wampus or that relentless, angry Irish drunk from a few years back?"

Well I guess I lucked out because my husband is an awesome lover.And Im not just saying that I have had more than him.

I guess I never really thought about it that much either or really "appreciated " that aspect because he is such a poon hound. I talked with other women about sex and many of them are 'frustrated" because their husbands dont seem to put a lot of effort into keeping her flame lit.Some women even married to men who are pretty much wam bam thank you mam..and think thats a "thrill" for her.I talked to one lady that her husband wont evne touch her "you know what' with his hand because he thinks that "disrectful" to her despite her pleas to the contrary..Seriously he just 'lays there' and she does all the work .

I think the differnce is my husband is "turned on" by "turning' me on.He just isnt satisfied unless I have a "good time".I think it feeds his man ego.

Love

Dallas

 

[Alceste]

Well I guess I lucked out because my husband is an awesome lover.And Im not just saying that I have had more than him.

I guess I never really thought about it that much either or really "appreciated " that aspect because he is such a poon hound. I talked with other women about sex and many of them are 'frustrated" because their husbands dont seem to put a lot of effort into keeping her flame lit.Some women even married to men who are pretty much wam bam thank you mam..and think thats a "thrill" for her.I talked to one lady that her husband wont evne touch her "you know what' with his hand because he thinks that "disrectful" to her despite her pleas to the contrary..Seriously he just 'lays there' and she does all the work .

I think the differnce is my husband is "turned on" by "turning' me on.He just isnt satisfied unless I have a "good time".I think it feeds his man ego.

Love

Dallas

Yeh - you're lucky then! I've been in a few relationships with people I loved, and just due to bad luck (and maybe an unusual glitch in my basic psychology), the guys I've loved the most have often been the least fun in bed. Might have something to do with both of us being too caring and considerate towards each other to really let go.

 

[DallasApple]

Yeh - you're lucky then! I've been in a few relationships with people I loved, and just due to bad luck (and maybe an unusual glitch in my basic psychology), the guys I've loved the most have often been the least fun in bed. Might have something to do with both of us being too caring and considerate towards each other to really let go.

Well thats the thing..unless we are fighting(which has been a lot and we have both been very mean to each other)..he is very caring and considerate outside of bed too.He has a lot of "natural" ability to do some of the stereotypical things most women like.

If I only listed his good qualities as far as how he treats me most women think I'm a fool to ever complain.

He's a natural "romantic"...He also is very "domestic" as well and he does all the things other women complain there husbands dont do unless they nag.And his favorite thing to do is spend time with me on top of all that.I am his priority and he is always thinking of me.(that is unless he is beign an ***-hole! LOL)

He "cleaved" to me .

Love

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Yeh - you're lucky then! I've been in a few relationships with people I loved, and just due to bad luck (and maybe an unusual glitch in my basic psychology), the guys I've loved the most have often been the least fun in bed. Might have something to do with both of us being too caring and considerate towards each other to really let go.

Lack of "passion".

If your going to love each other might as well let it all out..

I think thats one of the reasons my husband and I fight so hard when we fight.

Good times!

Love

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

Yeh - you're lucky then! I've been in a few relationships with people I loved, and just due to bad luck (and maybe an unusual glitch in my basic psychology), the guys I've loved the most have often been the least fun in bed. Might have something to do with both of us being too caring and considerate towards each other to really let go.

Not to go on..but I wonder how many men still have that she needs to be a "lady" attitude?

They say they want (what is it?) a lady in the streets and a freak in the bed?I wonder how many of them really mean that once they are presented with it?

Love

Dallas

 

[DallasApple]

SERIAL POSTING!!!

On that note..my husband says I "yell' too much and even I "talk too loud".I tell him you sure dont complain about that in the bedroom.He says "thats different ..thats "passion"..I said no its not.Im the same person and its coming from the same place.Just for different reason and different emotions attached but its all passion my passion.

I cant turn it on and off like a faucet my dear.

Love

Dallas

 

[linwood]

They say they want (what is it?) a lady in the streets and a freak in the bed?I wonder how many of them really mean that once they are presented with it?

Some of us have been presented with it and still do mean it.

Although I`m not disinclined to enjoy a little freak in the streets every now and again.

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Oh I've gotta take a crack at this one!

Assuming it's important to love whoever you sleep with, why is it important to love whoever you sleep with?
What makes it important? What are the consequences of having sex with someone you love compared to the consequences of having sex with someone you don't love?

Well, imo it is important to love who you sleep with, but not a requirement.

It is important because it makes sleeping with them more intimate and fun, sometimes.

It is important because if you love them, unless you're a psycho, you should know them well enough to know if they are dirty or not.

If you are sleeping with them and you do not love them, you are taking a risk:



:cover: Oh bleah...!!!

If you've slept with too many people you don't love, you could end up like right here:

or realizing that you saw this demotivational poster a tad too late.

Well let's see here, about more of these consequences...

I had sex with one of my best guy friends of 6+ years from high school who I had lots of friendship love for. The consequences of that? I am now in a relationship and I have lots of love-love for him now too Everything is perfect, but I am taking a huge risk cause if anything goes bad, it's going to be wretched bad.

The more you have sex with someone you love the more attached you get.

If anything goes sour it's going to SUCK.

Now, the joys of having sex with people you don't love... ha ha

You are taking a risk of developing feelings for them, but if you choose your friends with benefits wisely, you can keep each others heads on straight so that doesn't happen.

This is especially true to watch when you are using someone for a rebound. You know the saying,

"The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else."

It works. But due to your emotional state you have to choose your person wisely and set rules. Like, I will only have one Cuddle Buddy at a time, and, I will not speak openly about them...

lol

You are prone to finding many and over indulging which is bad.

You are also taking a risk if you are not a blunt person and you are sleeping with someone you don't love. If you do not have the capability to be blunt about how you feel in a polite up front manner, never sleep with someone you don't love.

They will end up thinking you are a manipulative skank, cause 8 times out of 10 they fall for you and are confused by your actions if you don't tell them,

"Just so you know I really don't want a relationship right now or anything remotely serious or tied down, although, you are really cool to hang out with, not to mention hot."

See you say something like that after he has made the first move so you don't make a fool out of yourself, and you've shut him down/aligned his thinking to yours, and given him a compliment... so he doesn't see it as an insult.

But you could still have drama, especially if you have bad choices in men. The good thing is though, sleeping with people brings out parts of their personalities that otherwise stay hidden behind walls they have built. Breaking down those walls is best done the dirty way, and more often than not you are glad you had safe sex, found out he is violent and likes to slap and choke p) and is forceful, which isn't your thing, and you move on and bypassed wasting your time.

Sexual compatibility is very important, and I for one, when I am interested in someone, like to get that factor out of the way before I fall in love with them.

Could you imagine waiting until marriage, and you find out on your honeymoon that your guy can only get himself off in the butt or something ridiculous like that?!

No thank you. Men hide things too well.

 

[richardlowellt]

Of course sex is a mystical, sacred act, or at least it used to be before the modern world ruined it, like it did with a lot of things.

And what makes sex a mystical or sacred act, religion?

Something about the rush of hormones and the potential to create new life gives it more meaning, than, say, making out (which most people still don't do with new aquaintances).

One can have sex for the sheer enjoyment of it with never having the object being to create "new life."

The potential to transmit STDs and cause pregnancy means that sex requires a great deal of trust and commitment (and something about the hormones sex releases tends to build bonds of trust anyway). Condoms only work about 80% of the time, last I checked. What are you going to do if she gets pregnant and you don't love her enough to raise a child with her?

Sexually attracted couples can be tested before the act, and there are plenty of ways to avoid pregnancy besides condoms.

EDIT: Oh, right, you're homosexual, you don't have to worry about pregnancy. "Atheist queer." Bleh, I dunno about you then. But as for most people...

What a rude and insulting human you are. All the great qualities of a Christian--bigoted, rude, insulting, self centered, egotistical, and ignorant.

Besides, if you weren't in love, why the heck do you feel the urge to have sex in the first place? Sex without sexual attraction ("love," as it's most commonly used today) seems kinda pointless.

Nothing wrong with dinner and a BJ. two people can enjoy each others company, enjoy sex, and not feel the need to "be in love"

 

[DallasApple]

Could you imagine waiting until marriage, and you find out on your honeymoon that your guy can only get himself off in the butt or something ridiculous like that?!

Im sorry but I spewed my drink out of my nose when I read this..You are priceless girl..!!!

Love

Dallas

 

[richardlowellt]

Your question should be: "Why is it important to sleep
only with your husband/wife?"

Because it isn't important!!

 

[Vasilisa Jade]

Im sorry but I spewed my drink out of my nose when I read this..You are priceless girl..!!!

Love

Dallas

Oh I betcha it's happened to some poor unsuspecting girl trying to do the "right" thing.

You know, "No good deed goes unpunished."

Besides, when you're waiting until marriage, you're not really sure how freaky this guy is.

He could just be chillin at his place while you're getting your nails done, absorbing porn into his crippled horny brain, developing more freaky fetishes each day.

Whoo... scary.

Before I commit I wanna know how big you are, how good you are, how freaky you are, I wanna see your porn collection... and watch it with you...

No anal probes or medical fetishes or electro-sex gear dungeons. Nope nope. Not unless I say so.

 

[Alceste]

Oh I betcha it's happened to some poor unsuspecting girl trying to do the "right" thing.

You know, "No good deed goes unpunished."

Besides, when you're waiting until marriage, you're not really sure how freaky this guy is.

He could just be chillin at his place while you're getting your nails done, absorbing porn into his crippled horny brain, developing more freaky fetishes each day.

Whoo... scary.

Before I commit I wanna know how big you are, how good you are, how freaky you are, I wanna see your porn collection... and watch it with you...

No anal probes or medical fetishes or electro-sex gear dungeons. Nope nope. Not unless I say so.

Yeah, you know I was thinking about this the other day, because the expression "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" popped into my head. I was thinking, why buy the cow when you don't even know if it produces milk? Or whether the milk is all ***** and undrinkable? You'd be taking a huge cow-buying risk. Even car salesmen let you have a test drive before deciding whether to commit.

 

[DallasApple]

Oh I betcha it's happened to some poor unsuspecting girl trying to do the "right" thing.

You know, "No good deed goes unpunished."

Besides, when you're waiting until marriage, you're not really sure how freaky this guy is.

He could just be chillin at his place while you're getting your nails done, absorbing porn into his crippled horny brain, developing more freaky fetishes each day.

Whoo... scary.

Before I commit I wanna know how big you are, how good you are, how freaky you are, I wanna see your porn collection... and watch it with you...

No anal probes or medical fetishes or electro-sex gear dungeons. Nope nope. Not unless I say so.

LOL!!!

Here is the thing! YOu will NEVER "really" know untill they snatch you up and have you in their bed every night and "committed".(they could be holding back trying to "trick you")

PLUS they can "develop' fetishes AFTER you are married !

But I agree with the "no anal" probes or being electrocuted ....If I get electrocuted it will be from a lightening bolt trying to film it in a tornado and the "anal probe" will be a tree coincidentally lands in my behiny AFTER IM DEAD from the lightening bolt!

Love

Dallas