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I believe that marriage does provide for those needs and I believe in marriage as an important institution. Not everyone is so lucky, but people who are happily married and stay together for life are usually very happy and very fortunate, although sadly, death of one of the spouses will eventually tear the bond asunder.
My parents stayed married until my mother died. My father clearly hated to let her go, but he never lost the gift of their relationship. He was better because of it. I also work with someone who is a widow, and to me she seems to have benefited despite the loss. I gather that a relationship has enduring benefits which you get to keep even after a relationship ends.
Looks like a loop-hole that really should be closed.
And the lesson is ... keep your documents. Glad you found it. We joke that we've been married 3 times to the same person. The first was the legal marriage, done at the Vital Stats office in the provincial capital. We had 2 witnesses. The second was a Hindu ceremony near the same time, but that was before we were integrated into the local Tamil Hindu community, back when we knew very little about Hinduism. The third was about 10 years later, after the Tamil community realised we had omitted the most important part. (Tying of the thali, similar to the ring, but a gold pendant) So we had another more grand wedding with all of our friends present.I don't really like talking about this, because my late husband passed on not long agobut since we are on the subject, I will tell you a story that people considered funny back when it occurred although it was not funny to me until I got it all resolved.
As I recall, about five years ago I was trying to sign up for my late husband's social security benefits, since I could get 50% of his social security from age 65 till age 70, rather than taking my own social security and having my benefit amount reduced. In order to apply, I had to have a marriage license, and I could not find one! So I contacted the Baha'i community where we had been married in El Cajon, CA, and they said they had no record of our marriage!
Then I contacted San Diego County clerk's office and they did not have any record of our marriage either. This got all around my office and I was telling people that I was worried because I might have been 'living in sin' for 32 years. Well, most people where I worked were Christians and they did not understand why I was worried, but since you know the Baha'i Laws on marriage I think you know why I might have been worried.
Mind you, it would not have been my fault if someone made a mistake and did not record the marriage, but if I had never taken out a license it could be my fault, and it could have had all kinds of legal ramifications. As the story turned out, my late husband asked me why not call the county clerk's office where we had been living when we got married, in Shasta County, CA, and when I called I found that is where I had taken out the marriage license and had it sent to me. We had been married all that time after all and I got my social security benefits. Now none of that seems to matter anymore.
It does, if you can endure the loss. Not everyone can.
By then they're stuck in a rut, so repeat the same thing, expecting better results.
Yes, with contraception and the social emancipation of women, the need for a provider-homemaker/nursemaid bond isn't so strong today. Women can make their own way in the world, and people can have sex without childbirth. Being single today has economic and career advantages.
That's why weddings were traditionally public affairs -- lots of witnesses. Written records were not always made.I don't really like talking about this, because my late husband passed on not long ago
As I recall, about five years ago I was trying to sign up for my late husband's social security benefits, since I could get 50% of his social security from age 65 till age 70, rather than taking my own social security and having my benefit amount reduced. In order to apply, I had to have a marriage license, and I could not find one! So I contacted the Baha'i community where we had been married in El Cajon, CA, and they said they had no record of our marriage!
Then I contacted San Diego County clerk's office and they did not have any record of our marriage either. This got all around my office and I was telling people that I was worried because I might have been 'living in sin' for 32 years. Well, most people where I worked were Christians and they did not understand why I was worried, but since you know the Baha'i Laws on marriage I think you know why I might have been worried.
Mind you, it would not have been my fault if someone made a mistake and did not record the marriage, but if I had never taken out a license it could be my fault, and it could have had all kinds of legal ramifications. As the story turned out, my late husband asked me why not call the county clerk's office where we had been living when we got married, in Shasta County, CA, and when I called I found that is where I had taken out the marriage license and had it sent to me. We had been married all that time after all and I got my social security benefits. Now none of that seems to matter anymore.
If you were never married or if you are divorced or widowed, why would you want to get married? In other words, what are the reasons to be married over remaining single?
I think people would want to be married if they plan to have children and raise a family, but other than that why would you have a desire to get married if you are not married?
I am mostly curious about people who are older and single but would like to get married. What are the reasons why older people want to get married if they were never married, or remarry if they were or divorced or widowed? In other words, why would an older person want to be married as opposed to remaining single and living alone?
If you are young or old, single and happy with no desire to get married, please explain why you have no desire to get married.
If you are young or old, and single and unhappy being single, and you have a desire to get married, please explain why you have a desire to get married.
As usual, I have a reason for asking these questions which will be revealed later.
Thanks, Trailblazer.
I almost forgot that you like cake.
Do you mean the rut of having to be married, so getting remarried and expecting different results?By then they're stuck in a rut, so repeat the same thing, expecting better results.
I guess being single is not so bad if one has friends and family and a wider social circle...
I can even recall that when I had thought I had failed to take out a marriage license the Baha'is who officiated the ceremony said I could fall back on the witnesses who attended my wedding.
That is easy to say, but you are married aren't you?
That is easy to say, but you are married aren't you?
I do not mind being alone and in fact I like being alone, as long as I have my cats for company.
However, I do not think it is healthy to be alone all the time like I am.
Just gotta find some non-fundy Christian baker to make the thing. Good luck in Biloxi!
Well, yeah, but tequila with salt and lime, right? Otherwise, I'm not sure it's legal!
Oh, sorry. Can't afford your patrician tastes!
I know a lot of people that are single, but then again Denmark is not really a hardcore religious country, so a lot of people chose to get married per tradition. Some just get registered at the town hall, either because they are atheists, not interested in the whole expensive party thing or because it comes with some benefits when you have kids.