Haha good point brother but you are making misconceptions once again.
Suppose your daughter, if you had one, wants to jump from a ten story building. And she cries no matter what you tell her, she says i want to be superman, haha. You will obviously have to use some sort of force. You would have to hit her, it is not out of having hate, it is for her own benefit and that you care for her, brother. You are cruel to be kind. These are answers for the Hadith that refer to force on women. So, similarly Muhammad had to face occasions where they were disrespectful to the messenger of Allah. Not just a normal husband, but Prophet Muhammad. Not just one occasion but many occasions where she would disrespect him and things of such. She had caused pain to the Prophet, so his father in law had to slap her, they though Muhammad as the greatest person, they revered him more than there own lives.
Anyhow, now to the Qur'anic verses. Firstly, the Arabic word Darabah is beat lightly. After being disobedient and causing pain to you, you can beat
lightly There is a Hadith that says you should not beat your wife on the face. Also, when you beat your wife there should be no mark left on the body. There is an example of beating with the miswaak, miswaak is a toothbrush. So, to say that you can just beat them in the way you are thinking is wrong. It is saying that you can beat them if they disobey but lightly. And in Hadith it states beat with miswaak when they disobey and cause pain to you. Wife Bashing is HARAM in Islam, if that is what you think that is what it is portraying.
The rule is first you tell her she is wrong and explain to her that you should be peaceful. If she continues to do things of such and causes you pain, then do not share beds with her, and the last warning if she still refuses and disrespect you may beat her
LIGHTLY. This is not a punishment it is a warning, brother.
Islam portrays equality of both sexes. This is a symbolic warning.
[Quran 3:195] Their Lord responded to them: "I never fail to reward any worker among you for any work you do, be you MALE OR FEMALE, YOU ARE EQUAL TO ONE ANOTHER........."