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Ask an Atheist, Get a Snide, Sarcastic Response
- Thread starter Kilgore Trout
- Start date
ATS,
When are you giving me back my panties? I left them at your place the other night.
When are you giving me back my panties? I left them at your place the other night.
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
Dear stiletto,
Your query seriously makes me wonder whether humanity has any redeeming characteristics whatsoever! Aside from your ignorance of what is known in English as a "contraction," you are also apparently unaware that, as an atheist, it is virtually impossible for me to be wrong. The whole reason for being an atheist, is so that you can be your own god. And, as everyone knows, god is omniscient. Therefore, atheists know everything, and cannot be wrong. In conclusion, your question is not only grammatically nonsensical, but also logically impossible.
Sincerely,
ATS
I love this thread.
I'm seriously considering "accidentally" deleting every thread in this place except this one. :yes:
linwood
Well-Known Member
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
Dear Mystic,
If only your intellect was as robust as your libido! Apparently, you're unaware of the axiom that "possession is 9/10 of the law." Your panties may have been yours when you left them at my place, but now that I am wearing them, the law says they're mine. Therefore, I will not be giving you my panties. However, I will consider a trade if you have something in yellow or pink.
Sincerely,
ATS
Draka
Wonder Woman
The best response on this thread! :jiggy:
Yellow or pink pair? Those were the ones I thought I left at your place.
Looks like it was the crotchless ones I left instead.
Tell you what, since I really want my crotchless panties back (and I'm not worried about you stretching them out of shape either), are you willing to trade those back for a roll of duct tape?
Judging by your attitude, it looks like I didn't punish you enough. Duct tape for that loudmouth of yours, a pair of my favorite handcuffs to keep you still, and my rubber strap ought to put you back in line.
So? What'll it be?
JustWondering2
Just the facts Ma'am
Gee who needs cable when you know how to find this thread!!
ROTFLMAO
:bow:
ROTFLMAO
:bow:
Buttercup
Veteran Member
I'd vote this thread as one of the top 5 best threads of all time. :yes:
Now, gimme some frubals, ATS! :149:
Just_me_Mike
Well-Known Member
Why does ATS's response remind me of the Charlie Brown special...
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
Dear Mystic,
Simply reading your query is punishment enough! Believe me, I can appreciate the fantasy of a woman dominating and punishing a man as much as anyone. However, I'm beginning to fear that you've forgotten that it is merely a fantasy. Now, if you come back to reality, and apologize sweetly enough, I may let you play out your fantasy of "dominating" me. In the meantime, I definitely need to get some more of these "crotchless" panties, as I've never felt so free and unrestricted in my life.
Sincerely,
ATS
Buttercup
Veteran Member
Dear lord you've planted a horrifying visual in my mind. You've gone beyond the realm of what's moral now, mister.
The_Evelyonian
Old-School Member
Dear Atheist,
How can you be so smug knowing that God is going to condemn you to an eternity in Hell when you die?
How can you be so smug knowing that God is going to condemn you to an eternity in Hell when you die?
Kilgore Trout
Misanthropic Humanist
Dear Atheist,
Would you like a beer?
Love,
Meg
Dear Meg,
It's about time somebody has offered me something that I so richly deserve, after all the invaluable advice I've given out to all these free-loaders! And, although I do appreciate your offer of a beer, it's going to take a lot more than one beer to make me forget about the soul-crushing pointlessness of a world without god, and the utter lack of meaning when one realizes there is no afterlife, only an eternity of darkness. However, we all have to start somewhere, so I'll definitely have that beer, and follow it up with a few dozen more.
Sincerely,
ATS
Black_Shuck
...
Dear Atheist,
I heard that God loves you too, what would you do if it came from heaven to give you a hug and a kiss?
Also what do you as a Godless person think of my title? Is it attention grabbing enough?
I heard that God loves you too, what would you do if it came from heaven to give you a hug and a kiss?
Also what do you as a Godless person think of my title? Is it attention grabbing enough?
linwood
Well-Known Member
Ooooo..that`s a great thread by itself.
If you could bring only one thing to hell for all eternity what would it be?
hmmm....