Rape Victims: Do They Have a Responsibility in Getting Themselve Raped?

[HonestJoe]

Does this view cross over to males? Women always get hit with a "responsible by actions" clause.

Yes, I’ve quite specifically not made any gender-specific references. I’ve also highlighted that rape is only one potential threat the we could be considered “responsible” for taking reasonable actions to avoid.

Female, or male, getting stupid and walking down an alley inebriated and nude, still gives no rights to a rapist.

I agree. As I said in my first reply, it’s important to completely separate the guilt of the criminal and the actions of the victim. If a criminal takes advantage of someone who is unconscious to rape or rob them that’s the same crime regardless of whether the victim is unconscious because they chose to get blind drunk or because of some illness. If the person is lucky enough not to be targeted by a criminal though, it would be considered perfectly legitimate to treat their getting blind drunk very differently to treating their being ill (indeed, it would seem odd to treat them in the same manner).

 

[LuisDantas]

Hey guys, thanks for the feedback.

I thought it was double standard because it is done by the same person doing the same actions in two different scenarios but treated differently. It was just a wild thought.

I of course don't mean that it makes a difference with the offender. The offender is guilty and does not deserve special treatment based on the status of the victim unless maybe the crime was done for self defense, which is not related to this discussion.

Sorry, you lost me. How is it a possible double standard again?

 

[Aquitaine]

If a woman decides to walk home alone in a big city at 2AM wearing practically nothing, I would call that unintelligent.

However, any man who decides to do anything to her is 100% fully responsible because that is his decision, he isn't a mindless sex animal, and deserves a good chop to the wee-wee.

To my knowledge, the stereotypical "walking alone in the street at night" cases are significantly outnumbered by the scenario of the majority of rape cases: that they were raped in a building by someone they knew.

 

[FearGod]

What the others say according to one official survey.

Drunk or flirty rape victims often 'to blame', says survey

Official government figures show teenagers and older people are more likely to say sex attack victims who had been drinking, flirting or taking drugs were at least partly responsible.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ukn...-rape-victims-often-to-blame-says-survey.html

 

[Smart_Guy]

Sorry, you lost me. How is it a possible double standard again?

I mean like having the same person getting drunk and commit a crime because of being absent minded vs. getting drunk and getting themselves hurt one way or another because of being absent minded. Because they in the former do something wrong, they get penalized for it but in the latter they are left perfectly free of any kind of responsibility, I have this weird sense of paradox presence.

I know this sounds weird, but this is me getting lost in thoughts in my times of loneliness.

 

[FearGod]

I mean like having the same person getting drunk and commit a crime because of being absent minded vs. getting drunk and getting themselves hurt one way or another because of being absent minded. Because they in the former do something wrong, they get penalized for it but in the latter they are left perfectly free of any kind of responsibility, I have this weird sense of paradox presence.

I know this sounds weird, but this is me getting lost in thoughts in my times of loneliness.

Being drunk is the start of the problem, the other issues depends on luck and the situation, he/she may be a victim in
one case and a guilty in one other case.

EDIT: I don't mean that all cases are due to drunkenness.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I was raped when I made it known I was leaving the relationship.

Please, go on and tell me that my experience is neither relevant, nor applicable to the conversation.

And please try to tell me I had any culpability in the assault and battery.

I won't argue with you, but you'll show your true colors to the participants and the lurkers in this thread.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

Yes I also was having sex with a lesbian that wanted to experiment, half way through she wanted me to stop, but I went all the way, I did feel bad about that, but it was another experience to add to my already confused mind, relationships are too confusing for me.

yeah you raped her

 

[That one dude...]

I mean like having the same person getting drunk and commit a crime because of being absent minded vs. getting drunk and getting themselves hurt one way or another because of being absent minded. Because they in the former do something wrong, they get penalized for it but in the latter they are left perfectly free of any kind of responsibility, I have this weird sense of paradox presence.

I know this sounds weird, but this is me getting lost in thoughts in my times of loneliness.

If we use the scenarios from my earlier post, a double standard would occur if the drunk person was held responsible whether they were the aggressor or the victim. It would also be a double standard if the people around them were held responsible in both cases. As it is, only the one who causes damage to surrounding objects or people is held responsible.

It is certainly possible for a person to get drunk and have nothing bad happen. What would they be responsible for then?

I was raped when I made it known I was leaving the relationship.

Please, go on and tell me that my experience is neither relevant, nor applicable to the conversation.

And please try to tell me I had any culpability in the assault and battery.

I won't argue with you, but you'll show your true colors to the participants and the lurkers in this thread.

I'm very sorry you went through that. Did you notify the police?

 

[MysticSang'ha]

If we use the scenarios from my earlier post, a double standard would occur if the drunk person was held responsible whether they were the aggressor or the victim. It would also be a double standard if the people around them were held responsible in both cases. As it is, only the one who causes damage to surrounding objects or people is held responsible.

It is certainly possible for a person to get drunk and have nothing bad happen. What would they be responsible for then?



I'm very sorry you went through that. Did you notify the police?

No. I was alone and terrified. A woman who was attacked after I was by the same man went to the police and pressed charges. This was 20 years ago.

He is currently free and contacted me recently to let me know he's "back." I let him know what would happen if he came anywhere near me again and I haven't heard from him since.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

No. I was alone and terrified. A woman who was attacked after I was by the same man went to the police and pressed charges. This was 20 years ago.

He is currently free and contacted me recently to let me know he's "back." I let him know what would happen if he came anywhere near me again and I haven't heard from him since.

to be honest with you...I hope he dies asap. I'm putting that curse out there.

 

[Sunstone]

...half way through she wanted me to stop, but I went all the way...

Well, that was sick -- not to mention criminal.

I did feel bad about that...

I'm willing to bet the woman you raped felt worse than you did about it. What do you think?

 

[That one dude...]

No. I was alone and terrified.

I don't understand. By contacting police, a rape victim has the law on their side and is not alone.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

Thank you your so sweet, I had a bad experience with a girl friend, she left me for a lesbian, I was very upset about the whole thing, I then never trusted women. I then started to experiment with the gay life, which also didn't turn out great, I have always been confused about sexual relationships, these day I stay away from the whole thing, I am much happier on my own.

I'm happy for your ex and I'm glad to hear you're staying away from sexual relationships.

 

[Sunstone]

I don't understand. By contacting police, a rape victim has the law on their side and is not alone.

You think it's easy to tell people you've been raped?

 

[That one dude...]

You think it's easy to tell people you've been raped?

No. It isn't easy to do the right thing in many cases.

 

[Sunstone]

No. It isn't easy to do the right thing in many cases.

I think you're missing the point.

 

[FearGod]

Yes I also was having sex with a lesbian that wanted to experiment, half way through she wanted me to stop, but I went all the way, I did feel bad about that, but it was another experience to add to my already confused mind, relationships are too confusing for me.

Half way through?!
You should have stopped, maybe she wanted to fart or to pee and a shamed to tell you about it.
Imagine that you're the one who felt for urgency in the half way through, will you stop or poop,
or even for any other reason, you should have stopped.

 

[Wherenextcolumbus]

No. It isn't easy to do the right thing in many cases.

No one needs your self righteous input about reporting a crime that didn't happen to you, no one needs to explain themselves to you either. Google is your friend.

 

[That one dude...]

I think you're missing the point.

I suppose so, since I don't know what you mean. I get that it was hard, and I internalize things all the time rather than tell others. I'm trying to empathize with Mystic. Sorry if I caused any offense.