Seeing That Women Can Go Topless Now Do You Suppose A Lot More Rapes Will Happen?

[MysticSang'ha]

In my opinion, the relationship between sex and rape is more complex than has been discussed by other side in this debate. A pox on both your houses!

Sexual desire is ancillary, not primary.

I don't know how many times I've mentioned this, but it seems to go unnoticed. Usually I get the "Mystic, rape is about sex, now just stop trying to make it about what the victim feels because that doesn't matter" kind of attitude.

I don't know. I'd prefer the science behind it, and my studies so far has led me to see the act of rape itself having very very little to do with sex. People who are not asexual get horny. But there is a distinction to what leads somebody to ignore consent. Entitlement mentality I'll accept. Dehumanization and objectification of the victim I'll accept. Sociopathic tendencies I'll accept. But because somebody got so horny they can't control themselves? I don't accept that. What I have read and studied just doesn't support that argument.

 

[DallasApple]

If so, why don't they "adapt however they may" via masturbation? Just curious.

I don't know why?Why ??You are a man you should know better than me why hetero sexual men would "ADAPT" to having great pleasure penetrating another mans anus or receiving oral from another man.I would say its to satisfy his sexual urges.

And don't pull the masturbation card.That is no substitute for sexual "relations".

 

[DallasApple]

I don't know. I'd prefer the science behind it, and my studies so far has led me to see the act of rape itself having very very little to do with sex.

I think a HUGE part for most of us our identity is our sexual being.Male and female.So rape having very little to do with sex ??For me as a rape victim is quite frankly dismissive of part of my being.To say RAPE is "not about sex" when I was (for one and I know others) DEEPLY sexually affected is saying we are WRONG..Saying its "not about sex" when it IS ????

Whatever I will dissenage and leave it to the "experts".The ones who understand rape has nothing to do with sex...So me and a LOT of other victims of rape need to realize its "not about sex" because regardless that it is ..it wasn't.

 

[Sunstone]

Sexual desire is ancillary, not primary.

I don't know how many times I've mentioned this, but it seems to go unnoticed. Usually I get the "Mystic, rape is about sex, now just stop trying to make it about what the victim feels because that doesn't matter" kind of attitude.

I don't know. I'd prefer the science behind it, and my studies so far has led me to see the act of rape itself having very very little to do with sex. People who are not asexual get horny. But there is a distinction to what leads somebody to ignore consent. Entitlement mentality I'll accept. Dehumanization and objectification of the victim I'll accept. Sociopathic tendencies I'll accept. But because somebody got so horny they can't control themselves? I don't accept that. What I have read and studied just doesn't support that argument.

We're in substantial agreement here, Heather. In fact, I could not have put my own position better than you've put yours. Thanks for that!

 

[Sunstone]

And don't pull the masturbation card.That is no substitute for sexual "relations".

Good Grief! What kind of "sexual relations" are there between a rapist and his victim?

 

[Sunstone]

But because somebody got so horny they can't control themselves? I don't accept that. What I have read and studied just doesn't support that argument.

So far as I know, not even people who have testosterone poisoning get so horny they can't control themselves.

By the way, just in case testosterone poisoning is unfamiliar to you, it's a rare condition that occurs in some young men. Its symptoms are indistinguishable from psychosis unless blood testing is used to distinguish them. But I've never heard of a higher incident of rape associated with men who have it.

 

[DallasApple]

Good Grief! What kind of "sexual relations" are there between a rapist and his victim?

Ask him..according to him.Its sexual relations though .Not just power and control.Maybe its getting off SEXUALLY?

Which was my point..It IS (can be ) SEXUAL..Not a "need " to dominate..not a "power trip" but sexual urges being realized and satisfied.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I think a HUGE part for most of us our identity is our sexual being.Male and female.So rape having very little to do with sex ??For me as a rape victim is quite frankly dismissive of part of my being.To say RAPE is "not about sex" when I was (for one and I know others) DEEPLY sexually affected is saying we are WRONG..Saying its "not about sex" when it IS ????

Whatever I will dissenage and leave it to the "experts".The ones who understand rape has nothing to do with sex...So me and a LOT of other victims of rape need to realize its "not about sex" because regardless that it is ..it wasn't.

What helped me with my journey toward recovery as a survivor was realizing that it wasn't about sex. To sexualize what happened when I was attacked seriously affected my sex life and my sense of security and safety. Also, in peer groups I have worked with and talked with at length discuss freely about the PTSD they continue to have from triggers that are all environmentally created....bare feet....the smell of fabric softener.....back country roads....wine bottles....truck beds.....and on and on and on. Theses triggers evoke the familiar feelings of the survival instinct since there was the acceptance of the possibility that we could have been killed during those moments.

I'm a survivor. I'm not being raped right now. I'm not being left for dead like I was before. What happened to me was not an act of sex. I was targeted to be destroyed. But that is not what sex is, anymore than people who have survived abduction understand that kidnapping is not a joy ride.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

So far as I know, not even people who have testosterone poisoning get so horny they can't control themselves.

By the way, just in case testosterone poisoning is unfamiliar to you, it's a rare condition that occurs in some young men. Its symptoms are indistinguishable from psychosis unless blood testing is used to distinguish them. But I've never heard of a higher incident of rape associated with men who have it.

That's interesting to note. I hope it gets noticed since it should be made aware that males are not the only ones who rape.

 

[Sunstone]

I think this debate might come down to what people think constitutes sex. Or perhaps more precisely, what their sexual expectations are; what they expect from sex, and what they don't expect from sex.

 

[MysticSang'ha]

I think this debate might come down to what people think constitutes sex. Or perhaps more precisely, what their sexual expectations are; what they expect from sex, and what they don't expect from sex.

Precisely, Phil.

 

[Kerr]

I think a HUGE part for most of us our identity is our sexual being.Male and female.So rape having very little to do with sex ??For me as a rape victim is quite frankly dismissive of part of my being.To say RAPE is "not about sex" when I was (for one and I know others) DEEPLY sexually affected is saying we are WRONG..Saying its "not about sex" when it IS ????

Whatever I will dissenage and leave it to the "experts".The ones who understand rape has nothing to do with sex...So me and a LOT of other victims of rape need to realize its "not about sex" because regardless that it is ..it wasn't.

I think the point is that:
horny + situation =/= rape
while
horny + situation + wrong mentality = rape

The idea is not that people who rape doesnt care about sex, but rather that sex alone wont make anyone rape. It takes a specific mindset to do it, one that allows you to ignore the victims experiences. Or one that allows you to enjoy the victims agony. Either way, its not just a matter of sex. It takes more then that.

 

[idav]

Porn is a risk factor .Its not my "allegation".

Life is a risk factor but it is something more than seeing it. Healthy outlets are acceptable where in a repressed society that might not be so easy.

 

[garrydons]

just one sincere question. why do you consider sex as your religion?

 

[Alceste]

I've never heard of rape being a problem at nudist resorts.

I run around naked in the house all the time and somehow manage not to get raped by my hubby.

 

[Poeticus]

I've never heard of rape being a problem at nudist resorts.

I run around naked in the house all the time and somehow manage not to get raped by my hubby.

Namaste,

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

M.V.

 

[Kilgore Trout]

In my opinion, the relationship between sex and rape is more complex than has been discussed by other side in this debate. A pox on both your houses!

As is the case with every other human behavior, the drives and motivations are complex and varied. And, as is the case with explaining every human behavior, those whose primary aim isn't to actually understand tbehavior, tend to oversimplify things.

 

[Alceste]

Of course its "speculation" ..

But I guess I find it amazing and quite fascinating the resistance to believe rape is ever driven by "sexual" nature ..to "get sex" ..it must be something else nothing to do with sex..Cant be someone would rape to get sex..I think that is ignorant.

I think that is burrying your head in the sand .And people pointing at the likes of Ted Bundy as the "face of the rapist"..Minimizing and ignoring the majority of rapes.Its like a side note."majority of rapes are committed by those you know "..O.K and did you HEAR about "fill in serial killers name"

I think people are saying rape is a PARTICULAR kind of sex that rapists specifically desire, and it is distinguished from normal sex by violence, power and domination, not by extra-super-horniness above and beyond what people who desire normal sex feel. A large majority of convicted rapists were in a consensual sexual relationship at the time they committed their crimes, and most reported planning the crime in advance and being motivated by wanting to fulfil a fantasy.

 

[Alceste]

But rape IS sex to him. That's the point.

And "great " is subjective anyway.

No it isn't. To the rapist, it is rape. The whole point is to be forcing somebody to do something they don't want to do and getting off on it. Rape is not a substitute for consensual sex in the rapist's mind. It's a specific thing that they specifically want. A substitute for consensual sex is a wank.

 

[Me Myself]

I think the point is that:
horny + situation =/= rape
while
horny + situation + wrong mentality = rape

The idea is not that people who rape doesnt care about sex, but rather that sex alone wont make anyone rape. It takes a specific mindset to do it, one that allows you to ignore the victims experiences. Or one that allows you to enjoy the victims agony. Either way, its not just a matter of sex. It takes more then that.

no one said it is just a matter of sex, what is said is that sometimes sex is the motivation.