Sexual orientation of forum members

[Sunstone]

57 votes so far ... not too bad. I wonder what a good/representative number might be.

Given that the respondents are self-selecting, wouldn't a representative number need to include just about everyone on the Forum? Or am I missing something?

 

[Quagmire]

Why comment at all if you're going to make sexuality a joke?

I'm not "making sexuality a joke", I'm trying to make a point.

If the only sexual orientations were "straight" and "not straight" I would understand people being dismissive of people feeling offended.

I think if you tried a little harder you'd understand why some people are being dismissive of other people being offended in this case too.

The fact is, this poll does not ask anything about peoples sexuality other than do they fit the societal norm. Why make a poll about sexual orientation if you don't ask about different orientations?

Why not ask the OP and then (here's a crazy idea) actually consider the answer he gives you?

 

[Aiden]

I'm not "making sexuality a joke", I'm trying to make a point.

Could you elaborate on your point? I would love to hear it.

I have read the OP's responses, and they have been pretty unconvincing. The only answer I'm getting is ignorance.

Edit: Also, why don't you answer my question. Do you think there are any similarities between pansexuality and asexuality?

 

[Quagmire]

Could you elaborate on your point? I would love to hear it.

OK: suppose someone created a poll like this:

I am:

A male coffee drinker.
A male non-coffee drinker.
A female coffee drinker
A female non-coffee drinker

It would be pretty obvious that the author of the OP is trying to determine the % of coffee drinkers vs non-coffee drinkers (or coffee non-drinkers?) and what the respective results by gender would turn out to be.

Fine.

Now suppose people started responding to that thread with posts like this:

Oh great: another ridiculously beanocentric poll that complete ignores the existence of people who drink tea!

or

well I guess the OP just figures that all non-coffee drinkers are the same.

.

or

Why not label the thread "morning beverage preference of forum members" if you ONLY want to know who fits the norm? "Non-coffee" isn't a beverage

See what I'm getting at?

Now, the OP posted this poll:

I am:
heterosexual male
non-heterosexual male
heterosexual female
non-heterosexual female

Why? Well I'm guessing he wanted to know what the % of heterosexual members was to those of ANY OTHER SEXUAL ORIENTATION.

Why in the world would it be necessary to list any (much less every) other sexual orientation in order to achieve that goal?

I have read the OP's responses, and they have been pretty unconvincing. The only answer I'm getting is ignorance.

That seems to be the only answer you're allowing any possibility for.

 

[Aiden]

Why? Well I'm guessing he wanted to know what the % of heterosexual members was to those of ANY OTHER SEXUAL ORIENTATION.

To compare preferences of drinks to sexuality is just laughable. Do you really not see the difference?

If you make a poll asking the SEXUAL ORIENTATION OF FORUM MEMBERS and only want to know who is heterosexual then your poll isn't named correctly. The data you receive means pretty much nothing... so what is the point again?

That seems to be the only answer you're allowing any possibility for.

I love when the privileged really show their true colors.

 

[Quagmire]

To compare preferences of drinks to sexuality is just laughable.

That's called an analogy.

Do you really not see the difference?

Do you really not see the similarities?

If you make a poll asking the SEXUAL ORIENTATION OF FORUM MEMBERS and only want to know who is heterosexual then your poll isn't named correctly. The data you receive means pretty much nothing... so what is the point again?

I really, really, hate having to communicate with people who insist that everyone else word every little thing perfectly. Without fail theses people turn out to be on a perpetual quest in search of things to be offended by, and they'll find them even if they have to make them up.

I love when the privileged really show their true colors.

I love it when people get owned in a debate and resort to cheap shots like that one.

edit: and thank you for showing your true colors so quickly. :yes:

 

[Quagmire]

Could you elaborate on your point? I would love to hear it.

Ah, so "I would love to hear it" was sarcasm. I figured. :yes:

 

[Aiden]

If you had a point you would have already made it. I don't know what you mean by "showing my true colors so quickly", as I am very opinionated on certain issues. Does it matter that I'm new?

 

[Drolefille]

See, another example of being dismissive about other's lack of fashion sense.



By ignoring mine.

No, I find your attempt at making a point both unconvincing and still insulting.

OK: suppose someone created a poll like this:



It would be pretty obvious that the author of the OP is trying to determine the % of coffee drinkers vs non-coffee drinkers (or coffee non-drinkers?) and what the respective results by gender would turn out to be.

Fine.

Now suppose people started responding to that thread with posts like this:



or

.

or



See what I'm getting at?

Now, the OP posted this poll:



Why? Well I'm guessing he wanted to know what the % of heterosexual members was to those of ANY OTHER SEXUAL ORIENTATION.

Why in the world would it be necessary to list any (much less every) other sexual orientation in order to achieve that goal?



That seems to be the only answer you're allowing any possibility for.

As noted, more detail would have been inclusive, more accurate, AND still provided the info that OP was looking for. As it stands, the information is not particularly accurate, has insulted several people and the responses to people who raised the issue were dismissive of them as special snowflakes. It was clear that it was "norm" vs" abnorm" and yet OP titled it "Sexual orientation of forum members." Asking about "ethnicity of forum members" and making the categories "white" vs. "non-white" would also be insulting, IMO.

I hope it's clear to you that I did not ignore your point, I just don't think it's a valid response and that it is in fact, dismissive of the concerns of those who feel excluded as petty.

 

[dgirl1986]

I think someone needs to look up what pansexuality is and what asexuality is before they start trying to compare the two...

 

[Aiden]

Ah, so "I would love to hear it" was sarcasm. I figured. :yes:

Why not answer a question, instead of answering a question with a question? Since that's all you seem able to do.

 

[Quagmire]

No, I find your attempt at making a point both unconvincing and still insulting.

You were probably already prepared to find it that way before I posted it.

As noted, more detail would have been inclusive, more accurate,

If you want a poll like that why not create your own?

AND still provided the info that OP was looking for. As it stands, the information is not particularly accurate, has insulted several people and the responses to people who raised the issue were dismissive of them as special snowflakes. It was clear that it was "norm" vs" abnorm" and yet OP titled it "Sexual orientation of forum members." Asking about "ethnicity of forum members" and making the categories "white" vs. "non-white" would also be insulting, IMO.

I hope it's clear to you that I did not ignore your point, I just don't think it's a valid response and that it is in fact, dismissive of the concerns of those who feel excluded as petty.

See my first line in this post.

 

[Quagmire]

Why not answer a question, instead of answering a question with a question? Since that's all you seem able to do.

What are you talking about? I wrote you a friggin essay for God's sake.

Do me a favor: don't ask me to elaborate on my point just because it'll give you more satisfaction when you ignore it.

This kind of passive aggressive crap gets old quick.

 

[Drolefille]

I really, really, hate having to communicate with people who insist that everyone else word every little thing perfectly. Without fail theses people turn out to be on a perpetual quest in search of things to be offended by, and they'll find them even if they have to make them up.

Or perhaps, some of us perpetually attempt to not be invisible. I have no desire to be offended. But one does not have to be offended to raise an issue, what is insulting is when our concerns are dismissed as silly when we're the people being talked about, and separated out as the abnormal ones.

The concept of privilege is a real one, it means not having to consistently prove one's sexuality - "you're not really asexual, you just haven't met the one. You're not bisexual you married a guy, etc" , not automatically being assumed to be straight, not facing religious, legal, job, housing discrimination for one's sexuality.

Not having to learn about these things is also privilege. Just as I didn't learn about racial slurs until I was grown - because they were never directed at me as a white person - not having to learn about how, for lack of a universal term, heterosexism or bi-invisibility and the like affect people, is a state of privilege over those who do.

 

[Aiden]

This kind of passive aggressive crap gets old quick.

Really?

I hear ya: I also noticed he didn't bother to ask about people who wear socks with sandals, and it really ****ed me off.

See, another example of being dismissive about other's lack of fashion sense.?

 

[Drolefille]

You were probably already prepared to find it that way before I posted it.



If you want a poll like that why not create your own?



See my first line in this post.

So you're dismissing my entire point without consideration because you think I dismissed your point without consideration despite my assuring you I didn't? I feel like you've set up a set of circular logic here where unless someone agrees with you, we can't possibly have taken you seriously. That's hardly conducive to discussion.

As I stated, I'm fairly certain that such a poll exists on the forums, though I don't recall which forum, but regardless the deflection of "why don't you do better" does not change the criticism of the existing work in the slightest.

ETA: Found it. It's Rainbow Room though so not gonna link here.

Straight Ally 46 42.20%
Gay 9 8.26%
Lesbian 7 6.42%
Bisexual 29 26.61%
Pansexual 7 6.42%
Non-Sexual 4 3.67%
Transgendered 4 3.67%
Intersex 0 0%
Other 3 2.75%

Although this one does not differentiate by gender it would be simple enough to make a ticky-box poll with categories for gender as well as sexuality and even gender expression, romantic attraction, mono/polyamory and the like depending on how deep one wanted to go. But sexuality and gender are fairly simple spectrums as these things go.

 

[Quagmire]

Really?

Yes, really. :yes:

 

[Quagmire]

Or perhaps, some of us perpetually attempt to not be invisible. I have no desire to be offended.

I disagree.

But one does not have to be offended to raise an issue, what is insulting is when our concerns are dismissed as silly when we're the people being talked about,

I thought your objection was that you're not being talked about.

and separated out as the abnormal ones.

The poll doesn't say "normal vs abnormal". You're the one reading that into it.

The concept of privilege is a real one, it means not having to consistently prove one's sexuality - "you're not really asexual, you just haven't met the one. You're not bisexual you married a guy, etc" , not automatically being assumed to be straight, not facing religious, legal, job, housing discrimination for one's sexuality.

The OP doesn't say any of that either.

Not having to learn about these things is also privilege. Just as I didn't learn about racial slurs until I was grown - because they were never directed at me as a white person - not having to learn about how, for lack of a universal term, heterosexism or bi-invisibility and the like affect people, is a state of privilege over those who do.

Then again, like I said: create your own poll. You want to foster awareness? Or would you rather just complain that other people aren't doing that for you?

 

[Quagmire]

So you're dismissing my entire point without consideration because you think I dismissed your point without consideration despite my assuring you I didn't?

You can "assure" me you're a pelican. Unless I see a big bill and some feathers I'll still have my doubts.

I feel like you've set up a set of circular logic here where unless someone agrees with you, we can't possibly have taken you seriously. That's hardly conducive to discussion.

I doubt you truly feel that way. I think that's just an all-purpose line you use whenever you don't have a legitimate rebuttal to something.

As I stated, I'm fairly certain that such a poll exists on the forums, though I don't recall which forum, but regardless the deflection of "why don't you do better" does not change the criticism of the existing work in the slightest.

ETA: Found it. It's Rainbow Room though so not gonna link here.

Although this one does not differentiate by gender it would be simple enough to make a ticky-box poll with categories for gender as well as sexuality and even gender expression, romantic attraction, mono/polyamory and the like depending on how deep one wanted to go. But sexuality and gender are fairly simple spectrums as these things go.

Except that that isn't what the OP wanted to know about.

What gives you the right to tell another member what they should and shouldn't be interested in?

 

[Aiden]

I disagree.

Why do you disagree with the statement? You think people want to be offended?

I thought your objection was that you're not being talked about.

You know exactly what was meant, they aren't referring to the poll they are referring to the people who are being dismissed by ignorant people.

The poll doesn't say "normal vs abnormal". You're the one reading that into it.

Really? Why is heterosexuality the only orientation represented then?

The OP doesn't say any of that either.

No one has accused the OP of saying that, we are simply referring to the meaning behind making a poll that recognizes ONLY heterosexuality as a sexual orientation.

Then again, like I said: create your own poll. You want to foster awareness? Or would you rather just complain that other people aren't doing that for you?

Can't people bring up concerns or disagree with a post without people being defensive? Why not discuss the concerns, instead of making them out to be ignorant.