I am a good man, so why don't I have a girlfriend? Do I need to be a jerk instead?

[Badran]

Well, I was being a bit facetious.

Certainly if someone can afford a great car, go for it I guess. Generally speaking though, the type of person who puts a lot of stock in a flashy, expensive car doesn't appeal to me, but hey, that's just me.

I understand, thats more than fine to not find that appealing. My objection was regarding making negative conclusions about the person (i didn't notice that you were being a bit less than serious).

Personally i have a personal limit as to how much money i would put in a car, regardless of how much money i have. But thats just me - my preference.

By the way, please note that I am talking specifically about "flashy" "look at me, I'm a ******" types of vehicles (for instance, really jacked up trucks with huge tires).

I understand that some cars, or kinds of cars, or level of cars, are tied with certain mind sets. My point was exactly that this is not the case.

Just because someone has one of those types of cars doesn't necessarily mean that he's trying to impress girls.

It could just be that he likes it. And i say this from experience, my best friend adores cars and would buy fancy cars if he had the money. And it has absolutely nothing, literally nothing at all to do with girls or impressing them.

 

[MissAlice]

I think what most of us are trying to say or at least myself is that not all women are into men who drive fancy cars or that fancy cars are requirement for a guy to get a girl.

 

[Kathryn]

I understand, thats more than fine to not find that appealing. My objection was regarding making negative conclusions about the person (i didn't notice that you were being a bit less than serious).

Personally i have a personal limit as to how much money i would put in a car, regardless of how much money i have. But thats just me - my preference.



I understand that some cars, or kinds of cars, or level of cars, are tied with certain mind sets. My point was exactly that this is not the case.

Just because someone has one of those types of cars doesn't necessarily mean that he's trying to impress girls.

It could just be that he likes it. And i say this from experience, my best friend adores cars and would buy fancy cars if he had the money. And it has absolutely nothing, literally nothing at all to do with girls or impressing them.

I understand, and point taken.

My answers were in response though, to assertions made by others that guys with expensive cars have better luck with women.

I didn't drive a Mercedes to please anyone but me. And I bought a brand new car FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE last year and I STILL get a thrill every time I get behind the wheel, because I love it so much.

Penumbra and I are talking about the same thing - she just said it better than me.

 

[Kathryn]

I think what most of us are trying to say or at least myself is that not all women are into men who drive fancy cars or that fancy cars are requirement for a guy to get a girl.

Right on.

 

[Badran]

I think what most of us are trying to say or at least myself is that not all women are into men who drive fancy cars or that fancy cars are requirement for a guy to get a girl.

Of course, one has to be out of touch with reality to think something like that. If for nothing else, then for the fact that most people don't have fancy cars.

 

[Father Heathen]

If some guy has a fast car and it's truly a passion of his, that's one thing. That's why I say it's not exactly a deal breaker, just a big hole that he'd have to work out of for me to view him as a potential date. If there's an explanation for it, like he fixed it up and loves it, then that alleviates the initial concern I'd have for seeing some guy in a fancy car. In that sense, it's a hobby rather than a character flaw.

But if the guy is like, "yeah this is my Porsche the ladies love it right?", then no way. I would view such a person as a boy, regardless of age.

You mean the "my car is cool, therefore I am cool" mentality?

 

[Penumbra]

My partner wants to get a Mustang. He's always wanted one, ever since he was a kid, and he can afford it now, especially if he gets it used. But he's still kind of playing with the idea, because his car still works fine, and he's more concerned about sustainability and so forth.

Now, if I saw a guy in his 20's with a Mustang, then for me that would not be a good first impression. It doesn't matter if he has it for girls or not; if he has it for girls then I view him as a boy, and if it's instead a major thing he likes, then it just seems like our interests are going to likely not align very well.

But since I already know him, his ego is not dependent on a car, and he's solid with his financial habits, then I don't view it as an issue. If he gets a used one, it'll be a hobby of his.

It's not really my cup of tea but, that's why we keep money separate! No arguments!

 

[Penumbra]

You mean the "my car is cool, therefore I am cool" mentality?

Yes. If some person is mechanically inclined and fascinated with cars, that's substantially different from a person who drives around a car for status.

 

[Kathryn]

Small penis alert!

Now THIS guy, on the other hand...

 

[painted wolf]

I admit I look at the fancy car guys.... but that's because I'm interested in the car not the guy. I could care less about him.

wa:do

Awe man I love Smartcars.... so wee and techy.

 

[MissAlice]

Of course, one has to be out of touch with reality to think something like that. If for nothing else, then for the fact that most people don't have fancy cars.

My middle sister is the one who drives and her bf is the one who rides. Not a fancy car but she's a few I know who debunk the many stereotypes I see so much of about women. True there are some women into guys with material and want men who do the providing. I have no problem with that but for myself, it has never been a requirement. As for guys and even girls who just happen to have a strong interest in fancy cars, that's something else. As one with Aspergers I may not understand the obsession with good looking cars but I do understand obsessions.

 

[Penumbra]

This is all such a crock of slop.

You didn't buy a car for the ladies, did you?

I've met many supposed 'spiritual girls' in my time , who pretend to crave for a spiritual guy.

but once the rugby player comes along, nice guy boyfriend (usually with a name like Che) is ditched.

Men and woman are animals - and animal lust is what rules the roost.

the rest is all just window dressing.

Meh, I'm not really into "spiritual" guys either. Depends on what he means by it, I suppose.

 

[Kathryn]

These guys are great! GO, REGULAR GUYS! WOOHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

 

[Badran]

I understand, and point taken.

Thanks.

My answers were in response though, to assertions made by others that guys with expensive cars have better luck with women.

I understand.

I didn't drive a Mercedes to please anyone but me. And I bought a brand new car FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE last year and I STILL get a thrill every time I get behind the wheel, because I love it so much.

Precisely.

And some people have enough money that its natural their buying habits would be higher than most. They can afford a great car, and it wouldn't harm them in the least financially, so they get one.

 

[Wannabe Yogi]

Stay in shape? Hard work. Be in better shape than your competition? Harder work.

Work out for your self not to get a date. Why do you need to be in better shape then the competition ? Most woman don't need a supper Athlete, unless of coarse that is what you are looking for, a super athlete.

Own a car? Work. Own a car that the ladies are known to pay attention to? Harder work.

When I was in my mid 20's I was dating a professional Ballerina. I did not even own a car. (I lived in a city and I did not need one)

Have work and a job to begin with? Work. Have work and a job that can compete with the rich players? Insane levels of work and luck.

I had a job to support my self. Self support is important nobody wants to pay your way.

Have a place to live to bring the ladies to? Work. Have a mansion to compete with the rich players? Insane levels of work and luck.

It is important to have a place to live but not only for dating. Independence is a sign of being an Adult. Yes, your right, you must work to have a good life. Once you get the life you want you will find that someone will want to join you on your path. You can look at it as work if you like. I prefer to look back at dating as a fun time.

In my early 20s I found what I wanted to do and be. I worked on it. I stopped Chasing girls and made friends, got a life. Then I found that naturally women liked me. Not all women just some, that was enough for me. Before I found my way, dating made me insecure and I was always working in desperation to get the fairer sex to like me.

I am a 53 year old simi-chubby single parent. I am middle class nothing to write home about. I was talking to two young (young in my book early 30s) totally hot lesbians (mostly about their 2 year old son) at a party this spring. They like me so much they pulled over a straight friend to meet me. The Woman looked like she was in her late 30s good shape and pretty. I hung out with them but since I am not dating at this time in my life nothing happened. Why was I offered the honor of meeting this woman ? Because we had things in common, they liked me, and I had something very simple to offer them. Kindness, an honest interest in their life, knowledge of yoga (thats what they were all into yoga), and I am funny or at least try to be. There was no work or chasing only kindness and fun. My young padawan this is the secret to dating.

 

[Quagmire]

Why does a caveman type always have a girl, but a nice guy not?

Well that's an easy one: cavemen don't talk, they just go "ugh" from time to time, so women just think he's a really good listener.

Exp:

*Woman walks up to caveman at a cocktail party:

Woman: "OMG, do you see what what'shername's wearing? Slutty much?"

Caveman: "ugh"

Woman: "I know, right? I can't believe some men actually go for women like that"

Caveman: "ugh"

Woman: "Well I'm glad to see some men still have some taste. It's like the other day when I was trying on a dress at the boutique --- oh and OMG! the cashier was so rude!"

Caveman: "ugh"

Woman: "I know! Don't you hate that? Well anyway. . . "


(Yeah, he's in)

 

[Badran]

I admit I look at the fancy car guys.... but that's because I'm interested in the car not the guy. I could care less about him.

wa:do

Awe man I love Smartcars.... so wee and techy.

You'd get along pretty well with my friend i just mentioned. When a music clip for example is on with fancy cars and hot girls, most people are looking at the girls, but he's looking at the cars.

And he would be just as mesmerized by the fact that people are not paying attention to the cars as others are mesmerized by the fact that he's not paying attention to the girls.

 

[Kathryn]

Work out for your self not to get a date. Why do you need to be in better shape then the competition ? Most woman don't need a supper Athlete, unless of coarse that is what you are looking for, a super athlete.



When I was in my mid 20's I was dating a professional Ballerina. I did not even own a car. (I lived in a city and I did not need one)



I had a job to support my self. Self support is important nobody wants to pay your way.



It is important to have a place to live but not only for dating. Independence is a sign of being an Adult. Yes, your right, you must work to have a good life. Once you get the life you want you will find that someone will want to join you on your path. You can look at it as work if you like. I prefer to look bake on dating as fun.

In my early 20s I found what I wanted to do and be. I worked on it. I stopped Chasing girls and made friends, got a life. Then I found that naturally women liked me. Not all women just some, that was enough for me. Before this dating made me insecure and I was always working in desperation to get the fairer sex to like me.

I am a 53 year old simi-chubby single parent. I am middle class nothing to write home about. I was talking to two young (young in my book early 30s) totally hot lesbians (mostly about their 2 year old son) at a party this spring. They like me so much they pulled over a straight friend to meet me. The Woman looked like she was in her late 30s good shape and pretty. I hung out with them but since I am not dating at this time in my life nothing happened. Why was I offered the honor of meeting this woman ? Because we had things in common, they liked me, and I had something very simple to offer them. Kindness, an honest interest in their life, knowledge of yoga (thats what they were all into yoga), and I am funny or at least try to be. There was no work or chasing only kindness and fun. My young padawan this is the secret to dating.

PREACH IT, you wonderful, regular guy, you!

 

[Kathryn]

Here's a role model for all you guys out there:

 

[Quagmire]

Here's a role model for all you guys out there:

Tell him Mr. Rogers wants his sweater back.