Obedient to husband, is conditioned to that the husband is obedient to God. If anything he tells you is not islamic, you don't have to follow. If you followed that this is not islamic.
It is not about authority!
I think I didn't follow. For example if I told my elder son to be responsible for his younger brother financially and the younger brother said no I am fine I can do it on my own. Is the young brother wrong in doing that?
I will be more than happy to find a wife who would ask me not to spend my money
This depends on the nature of work and the reasons. It is being obedient to Allah and not the husband.
Besides, such an issue can always be discussed before marriage. Even between non muslims.
I prefer if my wife won't work. But I have to me realistic and evaluate the reasons.
Actually it is the exact opposite.
women were treated like slaves or property
Women were used for one purpose, and then discarded. They had no independence, could not own property and were not allowed to inherit. In times of war, women were treated as part of the loot. Simply put, their plight was unspeakable.
Furthermore, the birth of a daughter in a family was not an occasion for rejoicing, but was regarded with humiliation. The practice of killing female children was rampant.